Off Your Chest

Dear Self,

Start focusing on what you love and figure out how you can turn that into a rewarding life/career

Oh, and stop shopping. You know you have a wedding dress to pay for. Those weekly trips to Jeremy's are not good for you since you can't wear a tunic at your wedding....even if it is white

with love,

nikki

Dear guy at work with the horrible gagging cough that is now getting on my last nerve:

Ok Ok Ok!!! Enough is enough!!! Seriously!! Go to the damn doctor. The coughing shit up is about to make me throw up. I've listened to it for well over a month. At first I felt sorry for you, but damn-it! You're getting on my f'in nerves now. Don't you know I'm pregnant and I get irritated very easily these days. Argh!!! GO TO THE DAMN DOCTOR YOU GROSS MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Signed,

Hormonal very irritated pregnant lady that is tired of hearing you cough shit up!

Dear guy Lisa works with,

Ewwwwwww

Thanks,

Danielle

Dear Alterations Lady:

See... when I said I wanted the dress to be short enough that when it's bustled I don't step on the hem, I meant ALL THE WAY AROUND, not just in the front. I understand that when I walk, it's only front to back. But I'll be dancing too. That's a pretty frequent occurance at weddings - the dancing thing. So, don't tell me it's normal for the sides to drag on the ground and that you only ever hem the front. I don't buy it.

I do appreciate your willingness to do the alterations today, but your attitude was unreasonable. We both know that a fourth fitting on the 27th with a pick-up date of the 5th is not a reasonable time frame when I'M GETTING ON AN AIRPLANE ON THE 6TH.

grrrr.

dear becks alteration lady,

you suck.

signed,

someone who has been frustrated by alterations before.

dear self,

what is your problem? get some sleep! that way you can focus during your workshops instead of staring into space...or what you thought was space but actually was your principal...

signed,

lauren

Dear Grass,

Why are you so hard to grow in Arizona?! I swear you take more maintenance than a delicate flower. Just grow, and stay green already!

Dear Weeds,

Why do you grow so quickly in Arizona?! I've never seen weeds grow so tall so fast in my entire life.

Signed,

a person who can't afford a lawn boy!

Dear weather,

Please cool down so I can let the puppies out to play...they are driving me nuts and the big one has gas so bad it's starting to peel the paint!

Dear DH,

Stop trying to blame the dog when you fart...I, unfortunately, know the difference and it's rancid and so NOT funny!

Cathy

Ok you are having surgery soon and you wanted to lose some weight so do it. Dont talk about it do it.

20 pounds is cute 30 is SEXY you are too old for this bs for once follow through with something