Off Your Chest

Dear cluless husband of mine~

 

Foreplay for me does not begin while sitting on the couch watching the Office while you scratch, adjust, and hold onto your boys, and then you go upstairs leaving me with the general cleanup of our tea cups, your ice cream bowl, turning the dishwasher on, locking the doors, switching over your laundry, putting the dog in her crate, turning off all the lights, checking on Liam, then climbing into bed to a very wet spot where you have thrown your wet towell from your shower that you just leisurly had, and end with you then looking at me and saying let's get freaky! I think maybe it might be time for some new moves my darling husband, if you wish, to continue, to get freaky any time soon.

 

Your loving, neglected wife~

Hahaha...not the wet spot! That would drive me up the wall, I have a problem with wet towels. Frustrated for you

To the 4 lazy men sitting next to me on the subway this morning,

 

When you see a pregnant woman get on the subway, you get your fat, lazy A$$ up and you give it to her!!! Stop pretending you don't see her and just do it. You IDOITS!!!! Why is it that only other women give up their seats for pregnant women

 

Oh, and to the man who cut me off and took that other seat once it became available - YES, I purposely positioned my wet umbrella to drip on you after you did that to me. And YES, I was waiting for you to ask me to move it so I could yell at you and tell you why I put it there. Morons!!!!

Tell me about it, sounds like some awesome parenting to me. Maybe you should start a school Maria.

Way to get revenge Jen! That was a good laugh. I've heard that your subways are totally crowded out there. Do you have to stand for a long time or is your ride pretty short? What a PITA!

There is a subway station on my corner and I never use it because it is so poorly laid out that it only goes through parts of L.A. I'd have to take the subway to a bus station and transfer twice to get to work - and I only work 15 miles from home. So I just drive my car like everyone else here....so sad

I'm not giving in on this one!! He doesn't understand why if there is a photographer included we need another one and we have to pay so much for it. First of all, I don't think $1000 is a lot for a photographer, I know plenty of people that have spent more, second I told him that we're not using the resort photographer, I've substituted other things we wanted in place of that so, its not like we're losing out or anything!

I hope he likes the pictures when we get them and doesn't still complain. Heck, I don't really care if he does or not, I know I will!!

Since my stop is the second stop on that particular subway line, I always get a seat. My ride is only 20 minutes and since I leave kind of early, it's never crowded. But there are days when I'm coming home that the trains are just PACKED. That usually means that the next train will be a lot less crowded but people still ram themselves in - morons!!! I never do that, I'm so spoiled. I'll just wait for the next train.

I can't believe I'm the only one that gave up my seat today for that lady. I was sooo pissed. One time, I gave up my seat for a pregnant woman and then a guy got up and gave me his seat because I did that.

Dear Starbucks,

 

My nonfat sugar free caramel latte just made my day. I swear nothing else compares, thank god I didn't stop at Dunkin Donuts for coffee this morning, I would have been so dissappointed. But why do you have to be so damn expensive, $5 for a coffee? I want you everyday, but I think FI will kill me!

I am with you on this one Jill, I hate to love it, but I love Starbucks and it also makes my day. And I must tell you before I moved to the city I live in now, I did have one everyday. Here the starbucks is too far away from my home and work, thank God.

I would wait for the next one too!! People aren't nice anymore, I swear. Thank goodness you have common decency )