No Kids -- Need advice!!!

Okay...so this can really be a sore subject apparently. I think everyone needs to realize that we all have our opinions and what might be right for one couple may not be right for another.

In my personal opinion...YES, by having your wedding a destination one where people have to travel they may want to bring their kids with them for a number of reasons (want to vacation with them, don't want to leave them home, etc...) and that is perfectly fine, afterall they are spending their money on their vacation and they get to dictate who comes on their vacation.

However, the wedding is a different story. If you choose to not have children at your wedding, weather it's at home, or far away then that's your choice and I think you are entitled to that. In this particular situation it's a result of safety and I completely understand that! Guess who is signing the contract to accept liability if something happens...you are! So you need to feel comfortble and protect yourself!

This may be their vacation for the year, but they are taking it because of your wedding that you are paying for etc...If they can't or don't want to abide by your decisions to not have children at the wedding itself, and they don't feel comfortable leaving their kid with a hotel sitter or they can't bring someone with them to watch them for the one night...then I'm sorry but maybe this isn't the vacation they should take this year.

It's a hard situation because my fiance and I have been through this a little bit and I'm not the most sensitive person, but the first instinct when planning any of this has been to think of our guests because "they are traveling all this way for us". While I do appreciate that and respect that, at the same time, no one is forcing them to come! Yes, I want them there and yes, I want to cater to them to the best of my ability and make it a nice stay for them, but I can't please everyone and I sure shouldn't have to change a vision I may have had for my wedding day. It's about compromise really! This is just my opinion!

So bottom line, I think you should give them a heads up and tell that that you noticed on the response card 3 people and were wondering who the third person was. Don't assume it's the kid at first, let them tell you and then if they say their kid, just reiterate the policy you and your fiance laid out there and they either accept it or they don't.

Hmm, from my understanding the original poster isn't saying people can't bring their children on the trip, just doesn't think it's best to bring them to the actual wedding. And it's not because she doesn't want kids there, just thought it would be unsafe.

I personally wish people would have brought their kids to our wedding. No one did! I was bummed.

This is definitely a touchy subject, and has definitely been hashed out before:

http://bestdestinationwedding.com/fo...n-wedding.html

But, in reference to the original question, I think if you've set a precedent (whether or not it's one I agree with!) you should stick with it, otherwise you're going to have some pretty upset relatives.

I would call them right away and find out why the RSVP says 3 and like everyone else said, reiterate that you and FI have decided no children. Stick to it!!

As far as not wanting children at your wedding, it's your wedding, you should call the shots!

Let us know how they respond.

maybe they were just letting you know that the 3rd (the child) would be coming on the trip - maybe they don't intend on bringing them to the wedding afterall. i'd definitely talk to them, just to clear things up - hopefully it's not a huge deal!

This is definitely a topic that stirs up a lot of emotions! We're not having childern at our wedding (or rehearsal dinner/welcome dinner, for that matter), but we totally understand if some people decide not to come at all because of that. Every guest needs to do what's best for them, and we've decided early on that we can't let our feelings get hurt if some people don't come, for whatever their reason is.

I understand that Cabo is a vacation destination, but I have a hard time with the idea that since it's a destination wedding, you should reconsider your policies, etc. Frankly, I live in LA, and all of the East Coast weddings I've been flying to are much more of a destination for me than the 2.5 hour flight from LA to Cabo! And it really won't cost anyone any more than it costs us to go to NYC and stay in Manhattan for a weekend wedding. So IMO it's equally acceptable to have a no children policy, no matter which city/country you have your wedding in.

The way I look at it is - I checked with my absolutely most important people (2-3 best friends and family) before I booked my date and decided on these things to make sure that they could make it. All other guests, however many come, are icing on the cake of what will be a wonderful celebration. I'm excited to have as many of them come as possible, but if they need to skip it b/c of my child policy, then that is totally ok.

Okay Ladies, as many people have said this is an issue that everyone is obviously feeling very strongly about and we have worked really hard to create a helpful, happy, and peaceful forum, so please let's end the arguement and understand that everyone has their own opinions about this...