Angry. Why can't he help me?!

Wow. I don't blame you for being mad. If FI randomly assigned a "job" to me and then refused to help me with it when I asked I would be beyond pissed. Umm, what exactly is it about this task that makes it your job, by the way? What is it he's doing (or thinks he's doing) that makes up for it? I would try to explain to him that you guys are a team now and that you are asking for his help. He's your partner and you need to be able to depend on him to pick up the slack if you're struggling or stressed. You know- appeal to his chivalrous side.

Usually I'd say just don't do it but he's got you between a rock and a hard place because you'll both look bad if it doesn't get done. He's acting like a jerk- a good, polite Canadian boy should be writing his thank you notes like his mother taught him to!

Ha! chivalrous, that's funny. Yeah, that's not him. He will point out when I use the wrong fork but doesn't think thank you notes, holding the door open for me, or helping me when I ask for it is necessary. Yesterday I had to swap out wireless router and now our tv in the bedroom won't stream netflix. So he's making all these snooty comments about how he deals with the tech stuff in the house and "hopefully that tv works again soon". We've had it all of three days and he's the one who set it up so I tried but have NO idea how to make it connect to the internet again. He's holding it over my head because that's "his job" and something I want him to do. It's not like I wouldn't if I could - I tried, I just don't know what's wrong with it!

At first I tried talking to him, negotiating, reasoning. I even opened a bottle of wine last night when I sat down to start them and told him we could drink wine while we write. No such luck. Now he's in a pissy mood because he didn't get lucky last night and is blaming ME for us not getting along right now! He is INSANELY good at turning things around and making the situation into why he should be mad at me when i'm pissed about something. Then I have to move from "attack" mode to "defense" mode. I really don't like this part about him either. Haha. So now i'm just furious and can't hold my tongue. He'd better grow a brain before I get home from work otherwise it's gonna be a nasty night.

And like I said before, it's not even so much that he doesn't care to write them - it's the fact that I asked for help and he won't do it. What kind of partner is that?! I NEVER turn him down when he asks me for something/help no matter what i'm doing.

wow!!! I hope everything is ok now. Do you have kids? He needs to work on his attitude ASAP b/c when the time comes, you'll be doing everything, since that's "your job". He needs to help you with stuff when you ask because you need a supportive partner. I would definately get this sorted out, don't let it go.

It's ok. I'm pretty much over it. No, we don't have kids yet and aren't planning on it for a good five or six years. I really was mostly upset that I ask for help and he refused. He kinda just goes through these moods where he's so darn stubborn! Sometimes he's great help - other times, not so much. Thanks for the moral support!