Need To Vent!

[deecol]

@@calgarybride2015  Crazy isn't it! lol can't help but laugh.

 

We're expecting a few guests to book on their own after the deadline, and we still have a few from the UK that need to book, and may have some stragglers book in towards the end.  When do you think I should make my final RSVP date for? I've accepted that those people who book super last minute won't get favours etc that I need to preorder.

[calgarybride2015]

We had ours November 1st ish for our January 21st wedding. 3 months out my resort wanted a final head count so we said that after that date we couldn't change it. That said by that point we only have 2 couples unsure and they had booked by then. I actually ended up just buying 50 of everything so had 5 to many! Just because I ordered stuff early on! I'd say 2-3 months before is reasonable and if people can't commit by then I would assume it's a no. Ie most people need to book holidays off work, the trip, etc. But we made special exceptions where needed. We had one couple would couldn't request 2015 holidays until November 1st 2014 so we chose that date for for them. That said they approached us about it early on. They didn't come to us last minute.

 

 

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[deecol]

@@calgarybride2015 Great advice thanks!  I was thinking 2-3 months.  3 sounds great.

[TinkerSofi]

We did 3 months as well when the final payment was due. It worked out and we were able to get final numbers then  

 

I also had a few extras of everything because I had bought them so far in advanced, but oh well. Better to be prepared. 

[deecol]

@@TinkerSofi Sounds good!  Thanks for the advice.  I'm Italian, always better to have more than not enough lol

[Cablelove11]

I am going through something similar now with someone who I believed to be super close. Waited two months before final payment to question my motives for picking such an expensive resort and even said that she felt as if I was asking the guests to pay for our wedding! The audacity! Now I see that she was just looking for a way to back out and I'm fine with that... All that matters is that my future husband and I are happy

[calgarybride2015]

@@Cablelove11 as I said above last year and I still stand behind it --

We DW brides see it all. It's so unbelievable the actions of people regarding weddings. I lost who I thought was my best friend from getting married but I have gained many more valuable friendships from

People who I never thought would be there for me. Focus on the good and on the people who step up -- they mean the most and the relationships you'll build thru this and your wedding week you'll cherish forever

 

 

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[bride2016]

I don't know how I just saw this thread now, but wow.. the nerve of some people. It honestly bothers me sometimes how insensitive people can be when you're having a DW as opposed to an at home wedding. I can't even begin to explain how frustrating it was when some people's attitudes were that I got a free wedding because of them. Little did they know that our wedding actually cost us $10000.00 and yes, the free trip is an extra perk if you get it, but we weren't banking on it either.

 

My aunt actually backed out of our wedding week the week before we left and my mom was extremely upset because it was her only sibling going. After the wedding, I received no card from her.. absolutely nothing at all. Not that we were expecting money or anything, but she backed out the week of our wedding and got her trip amount reimbursed because she bought insurance. Not even a card to say congrats? 

 

I saw her at a family gathering a few weeks ago and she brought it up to me saying how her booking benefitted me and that's why we didn't get a card. I was so offended that I actually told her "You did nothing for me. I paid for my entire wedding and you didn't help me in ANY way, in fact it was quite the opposite because you backed out the week before we left and I had to pay a per person rate for many things for my wedding in advance".

 

She knew she offended me and I honestly haven't spoken to her since. I do hold a grudge sometimes, but in this case I don't feel wrong for it. I honestly can't stand when people are this ignorant and don't understand.

Chester and I are a young couple just starting out and worked hard to pay for our whole wedding. No one assisted us.. it just bothers me how someone can discount that with some ignorant words and thinking that our guest list paid for our wedding because they attended it.

[calgarybride2015]

@

OMG I want to hope your kidding but I know your not. WTF?!? Even if her booking benefited you - a $4 card is to freaking much to ask? Wow I don't blame you for not speaking right now. I have no words. Hugs

 

 

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[bride2016]

@@calgarybride2015 thanks! xo 

 

I know.. I was so mad and honestly I still am. The worst part is that her and her husband are retired and super well off.. again.. i'm not expecting money from her, but it's like.. have a heart. A card with some nice words would have sufficed.

 

She was also bragging about some trip she went on right before my wedding.. it was so infuriating to me. I will never look at her the same after this and I know my parents feel the same. My mom was super hurt and still is.