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Invited To Destination Wedding, Guest Allowed, But Not To Ceremony?


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I started on one side of this topic and ended up with a totally different opinion. At first I didn't want to invite singles with a guest, mainly because I didn't want random people at my wedding, but after I sent out the invitations I realized that was not very nice of me and there weren't even that many singles to begin with. Even though i didn't address my invites with "and guest", I just told them they could come with someone if they wished and I added a +1 on their online RSVP. I feel much better about this decision because to be honest, i won't be able to be with everyone all the time, and this way it will be nice that everyone has at least one person to spend their time with and plan their days. I probably wouldn't go to a destination wedding that didn't allow me to bring someone only because I'm single. There's only a handful of people who are bringing someone else, many actually ended up rooming together with other single friends :) 

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I started on one side of this topic and ended up with a totally different opinion. At first I didn't want to invite singles with a guest, mainly because I didn't want random people at my wedding, but after I sent out the invitations I realized that was not very nice of me and there weren't even that many singles to begin with. Even though i didn't address my invites with "and guest", I just told them they could come with someone if they wished and I added a +1 on their online RSVP. I feel much better about this decision because to be honest, i won't be able to be with everyone all the time, and this way it will be nice that everyone has at least one person to spend their time with and plan their days. I probably wouldn't go to a destination wedding that didn't allow me to bring someone only because I'm single. There's only a handful of people who are bringing someone else, many actually ended up rooming together with other single friends :)

 

You definitely can't be with everyone all the time!  Thankfully everyone got along and everyone had a blast together.  We had one little blip with someone (long story) but they just preferred not to partake in anything and spent a lot of time in their room.    With larger resorts you also don't run into everyone everyday, especially when people have different interests. Our resort wasn't MASSIVE, but we had people upgraded to the beach front side and they had all their own pools, food, etc. so they had no reason to venture over to our side.  After the first day when noone could find eachother haha we sorted it out and had regular meeting times and spots!  So with that said and with what I experienced I stand even stronger on everyone should be offered that plus one.

Edited by calgarybride2015
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There's another side to this as well. Are you going to pay the dollar cost between double and single? Something else to think about. If you invite someone and don't include a +1 you're also asking them to pay more than everyone else. Not everyone wants to be "doubled up" with someone they don't know just because they're a single that wasn't allowed to bring a "buddy".

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You definitely can't be with everyone all the time! Thankfully everyone got along and everyone had a blast together. We had one little blip with someone (long story) but they just preferred not to partake in anything and spent a lot of time in their room. With larger resorts you also don't run into everyone everyday, especially when people have different interests. Our resort wasn't MASSIVE, but we had people upgraded to the beach front side and they had all their own pools, food, etc. so they had no reason to venture over to our side. After the first day when noone could find eachother haha we sorted it out and had regular meeting times and spots! So with that said and with what I experienced I stand even stronger on everyone should be offered that plus one.

Did you get to do some excursions? If you did, How many did you do and did your guests tag along? :)

 

 

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Did you get to do some excursions? If you did, How many did you do and did your guests tag along? :)

 

 

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I only did the dolphins with the kids but that's on site at the resort. We booked a time slot that our friends with their son were doing it. I wasn't overly interested in what the others were doing but they all booked in groups. Some went to chicken pizza (chintzenitza lol) and some did a small catamaran and others playa del Carmen. People just talked and found people with similiar interests. We talked about coco bongos a lot but never did it.

 

 

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I am having an issue with this also. I have invited all of my family and very very few friends (mostly wedding party are made up of friends) and then family as the rest. I have invited family who's S/O they have been with a long time, but there is one cousin that just started dating a guy and I didn't say +1 on her invitation and i'm not really sure if that was proper. For me it isn't a matter of cost, but numbers... I have 143 person guest list and have only booked ceremony/reception for 80 guests. My fault totally, but i really wanted to get married on the beach and it only allows 80 people including the wedding party! I don't want to tell her she cant invite him but on the other hand if he puts me over what am i to say? Maybe check with the resort to see if one extra body makes a difference?? ahh so hard!! 

 

Love my family to death! But MAN there are a lot of them!! On my FI side too!

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@@breezie I mean...1 more wouldn't be my concern. My concern would be you only allowing 80 people bc of space and have invited 143. Lol

 

Not everyone will come, I'm sure. But you might wanna look into squeezing all 143 in first, before worry about 1 person.

Edited by LisaAnthonyPoppy
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  • 2 weeks later...

@@breezie I mean...1 more wouldn't be my concern. My concern would be you only allowing 80 people bc of space and have invited 143. Lol

 

Not everyone will come, I'm sure. But you might wanna look into squeezing all 143 in first, before worry about 1 person.

 

 

Iv cut my list down, and feel as though its not fair to cut certain people out to fit someone iv never met before....But I also think its not fair to not invite a SO of a guest.....surely you can see the dilemma 

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Iv cut my list down, and feel as though its not fair to cut certain people out to fit someone iv never met before....But I also think its not fair to not invite a SO of a guest.....surely you can see the dilemma 

It's a really tough choice and I've been there before, but in a way I have to agree with @@LisaAnthonyPoppy. Take your guests as if they come in a non-negotiable package of 2. If a guest is really important to you, you have to take into account that they might come as a package with someone else, even if you don't really know the other person. It does feel somewhat unfair for others who get cut off the list, but at the same time I would rather have my A-list guests there, either with a plus one or not, rather than them not come in order for me to accommodate my B-list guests. I don't know if that made any sense? 

 

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