Gifts

[Kayla88]

Hey everyone,

I need some advice/ opinions. My FI and I have decided that we wanted a best wishes only wedding, no gifts since we believe that our guest are spending a lot to join us on our DW and we don't Need anything. However I am still have a bunch of people asking me where we are registered, since they are not able to attend the wedding. Should I make a registry for the individuals who want to buy? If so how would I inform family and friends without making them feel like gifts are now necessary? T iA

[kmk2016]

There are a few threads on this topic, and like you- most are graciously declining gifts. Most who feel this way don't register, even if asked to do so- and some do so but are very discreet about sharing the registry information. I think it's a personal choice really. Etiquette dictates you should never have registry information on any form of your invitation, so it's still handled discreetly in traditional at home weddings. I have opted to not do any form of registry despite getting the question. Those who wanted to purchase a gift weren't angry that I politely declined stating that their presence was truly the only gift we wanted... They were surprised- but weren't pushy about it. If we get a couple gifts... We can't control that... But they won't be selected off a registry!

[Moments That Matter]

Some of our wedding couples have opted to offer their guests the option to contribute to their wedding photographer's fee - which is a wonderful way for everyone to score a win/win scenario

A photo of the wedding couple with their guest also makes an excellent "guest-gift", another win/win !

 

 

 

Wishing everyone happy research, and all the best with their plans - cheers!!! team MTM

 

[beckys98]

I wouldn't register just because people asked - it is kind of them to want to give a gift, but they can always give something thoughtful/personalized or money/gift card if they feel they must. I feel like our other guests wouldn't take the "no gifts" seriously if they knew we registered. No one wants to be the jerk that doesn't bring a gift when everyone else does and I'm afraid people would buy out of fear of being "that guy."

 

We REALLY, REALLY don't want our guests buying gifts so we're being stubborn about it No shower, no registry.

[calgarybride2015]

We didn't do a registry either.

I didn't make mention of anything on any of our invites, brochures, website, etc.

When people ask I politely tell them that their presence is gift enough for us.

As it seems most people are ok with that, but close family has been asking a bit more -- my aunt asked me the other day if she could combine one of our wedding gifts with our Christmas gift so she didn't have to lug it to Mexico  OMG! I told her she didn't need to get us anything, but if she insisted we had no issue with receiving it at Christmas.

 

I'm personally not comfortable doing a registry, but as someone said above, they can either come up with a nice personalized gift or a card/money. 

 

Good luck!

Edited October 31, 2014 by calgarybride2015

[Kayla88]

Thanks so much I love this forum cause the minute I start doubting myself you amazing people understand and give the best advice.

[GingerBride]

We specifically said your presence is present enough no gifts.  With that said, we still have a registry as there are still some people who will want to buy you a gift, the ones who can't make it or even for showers, engagement parties etc.

 

It doesn't hurt to have one and no you will not look greedy

[veryvalentine]

We are in the same boat.  We had a nice engagement party about a 11 months from our wedding date and celebrated the engagement and announced that we are having a destination wedding.  We registered for that party and it was a nice way to include a lot of people that won't be able to attend.  We surprised everyone with mariachis so it totally got everyone in the mood for the party.

 

We aren't going to go as far as say no gifts, but we are not going to be sending out any registry info or anything like that...their attendance is a gift

[Kayla88]

Thanks for all the feedback.