Why Do People Discourage Other People?

[DebbieSmith]

Since July of last year, I have felt more comfortable about my body. Most people that I have included in my diet have been supportive, while there are others that I have heard nothing but negative comments from almost since the start.
 

"Stop counting calories, you're ridiculous. You need to live a little!"
"You're not fat, you don't need to lose any more weight!"

"You were never fat!"

"Why do you want to lose weight?!"

These are some of the things that have been said to me as I've progressed. Thankfully, I have had the will to ignore it and keep progressing. I just want to know if anyone else experienced this and how did you respond to it? 

[amanda2016]

Basically it is simple. They are discouraged in themselves..

 

You know people dont want you to succed at something that they feel they cant succed at. Or the simple fact they hate for you to be or do better than them. Insecurity warrants for a person to someone in their corner whom they feel like they have leg up on so they can somehow make themselves feel better by an illution of always thinking someone is worse off than them..

 

I am sorry you are dealing with this. Stay strong, Keep your eye on your goal and if you ever need to vent I am hear to listen.. Good Luck!

x

[calgarybride2015]

I know this well! I lost 120 lbs and heard it. Ummm no if I lost that amount and still weigh 160 I definitely needed to lose it. So I agree with what was said about - a lot is insecurity in themselves. Also too, 'stop losing weight you look sick' etc could be more because you do look great to people. They only remember me large so I look better, just not what I want for myself. I usually just smile ... Or ignore them. If the words are sincere I thank them but mention I have a goal I'm working on. Don't stop moving towards your goals because of negative nellies. Good work!

 

 

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Edited October 22, 2014 by calgarybride2015

[beckys98]

First of all @@calgarybride2015 - holy smokes, 120 lbs! Great job!

 

@@DebbieSmith I'm sorry you've been discouraged. Sometimes people do mean it in a positive way and think they are paying you a compliment, but they just go about it all the wrong way. To avoid comments I've framed conversation around diet/exercise in terms of a lifestyle change and just that I want to be a healthier, stronger, more energetic version of myself. Losing weight is a side effect of that effort (albeit a welcome one)! People have a harder time objecting to you wanting to be healthy than to losing weight - as bizarre as that sounds!

 

Keep at it!

[VegasBride121314]

Since July of last year, I have felt more comfortable about my body. Most people that I have included in my diet have been supportive, while there are others that I have heard nothing but negative comments from almost since the start.

 

"Stop counting calories, you're ridiculous. You need to live a little!"

"You're not fat, you don't need to lose any more weight!"

"You were never fat!"

"Why do you want to lose weight?!"

These are some of the things that have been said to me as I've progressed. Thankfully, I have had the will to ignore it and keep progressing. I just want to know if anyone else experienced this and how did you respond to it? 

Don't let the haters get to you! It's easier for people to talk negative if they are not happy in their lives. This group will lift you higher than you ever imagined, especially when it comes to outsiders trying to spoil our joy. We are not having it, and won't let any of our BDW brides feel attacked. So, use this forum to allow us to carry you when others are beating you down! 

[amanda2016]

Don't let the haters get to you! It's easier for people to talk negative if they are not happy in their lives. This group will lift you higher than you ever imagined, especially when it comes to outsiders trying to spoil our joy. We are not having it, and won't let any of our BDW brides feel attacked. So, use this forum to allow us to carry you when others are beating you down! 

Well Said!!

[jeffandrobyn]

Don't listen to people that don't have anything positive to say. Something to keep in mind: people who are heavier who are listening to people who aren't fat talk about losing weight won't understand. Just my experience.

[helenk]

Well it's weird I've gotten some comments from my family who are back home in MA who aren't even here in person to see results, only from a few pics that were up online. My mom was all "you don't want to lose too much weight" and after seeing like a couple pics from a baseball game we went to "your face looks weird" well thanks MOM! Lol. My grandmother said the same thing about not losing too much. She's like "you don't want to have loose skin". First off, I don't think I was THAT BIG that once I lose all my weight I will have loose skin. And I'm trying to be healthier, don't they get that? Greeks I tell ya!

 

 

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[JoannaBanana]

I've lost 35, and this is all so true.  My favourite is "one wont hurt" or "oh it's just now and then."  Okay well that's the mentality that got me where I was in the first place.  You do you, I'll do me.

[JoannaBanana]

I had someone tell me I was losing too much weight twice today, because once wasn't enough.  I'm not even a healthy BMI yet.  They said I'm doing it "too fast."  Well I disagree.  I used to eat whatever I want whenever I want, and now I eat closer to normal.  Slow and steady.  It makes a difference.  I get that I look "different" now, but I don't think it looks bad, or that I'm doing it in an unhealthy way.  Man, people just have to throw shade.