Helping Guests with Travel Expenses

leonina · June 24, 2013

I'm just curious if anyone else has encountered a similar situation as mine. I have 6 siblings and a few have significant others. As they are all younger than me a lot of them don't have jobs. I'd like to take the pressure off my parents who also don't have much money to spend by possibly paying for hotel rooms for all of the siblings. They would have had to travel across the country for my wedding regardless as they live in TX and I live in PA.

When I think about the details of offering to pay for their all-inclusive hotel rooms it gets a little confusing. Originally I was thinking of getting the siblings that are couples their own hotel rooms and pairing up the single ones. They will all have the option of bringing a +1, so the pairing up singles might not work in the end.

Also, a couple of my siblings have had a past childish tendency to destroy hotel rooms. How would I go about telling them to use their own credit cards for the deposit so I can avoid any damages to the room put on my card?

Then I was thinking of offering to pay for their flights instead, but that would be a lot more expensive to do than paying for hotel rooms. Plus, my parents usually have frequent flyer miles to spare, so they could help out with the flights.

Ah, good intentions lead to more stress and over-thinking.

Any ideas or suggestions?

Carlota1981 · June 25, 2013

Hello Leonina,

Your wedding is in Nov 2014, so this is more than one year... Dont they have the possibility to look for a job to pay sth? If not, I would talk about this with your parents, I do not think is fair you pay all the expenses... At least half and half.

And regarding the rooms... yes of course, I will not be responsible of possible destroys at the rooms so ask them for their credit cards. Say sth like the hotel does not accept the same credit cards for so many rooms... (just in case they decline to do it).

For what I have learned about guests and family in particular, about my destination wedding is to try to do not involve too much in things like that. I started doing this at the beggining of my compromise and I have fastly learnt to do not do it. So I would not really give your credit card. If not, give your parent's one. OK I know they are your siblings but you are not their parents.

I have two sisters and the smallest is 25 years old and no job. My parents are paying her the flight and hotel. I alredy have a lot of expenses to do that. Believe you are still have a lot of months until your wedding day arrives so I suggest you to not start adding more, at least at the moment.

Hope to be helpful ; )

Lydia1120 · June 25, 2013

I agree with Carlota.....given that they are of age to have significant others, and that you are giving plenty of notice, they should be incurring the cost of the trip themselves....or at the very least, pay for most of it.

Backy · June 26, 2013

i agree too. I give my guest 1 year notice and ask them to save up monthly putting $100 away. that's would be a lot less burden for them

leonina · June 26, 2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Backy

i agree too. I give my guest 1 year notice and ask them to save up monthly putting $100 away. that's would be a lot less burden for them

Thanks ladies for your input! I think I'll keep my offer about paying for hotels quiet until I found out people are struggling to pay for the trip. All of my siblings are college students, so they can't really put away money over the next year, but they graduate 6 months before my wedding and hopefully will be able to save up in that time. If not, I'll help.

Kyliewylie · April 4, 2014

I'm in the same situation! I have 5 younger siblings who don't have a lot of money (in school, young, etc.) and some of which have significant others, and I'm not sure who to help and by how much, but I think I will wait and see what they come up with and then help out for whoever couldn't otherwise make it