Not Choosing Bridal Party Attire- Am I Crazy?

[missb0308]

I was the same way, I only have a MOH, and I told her that it didn't matter to me what she wore.  Whatever she wanted was fine with me.  She kept pressing me, so I finally suggested maybe a color to blend with my colored shoes and necklace.  I also knew it was a color family that would look amazing with her skin tone and hair color, so we shopped online together for a dress that she liked and found a fantastic convertible dress online at Target for $29. 

 

As a MOH or bridesmaid, I can see where a little guidance in the way of a color or at least color family would be helpful. 

[Jenny2014]

Originally Posted by missb0308 

 

I was the same way, I only have a MOH, and I told her that it didn't matter to me what she wore.  Whatever she wanted was fine with me.  She kept pressing me, so I finally suggested maybe a color to blend with my colored shoes and necklace.  I also knew it was a color family that would look amazing with her skin tone and hair color, so we shopped online together for a dress that she liked and found a fantastic convertible dress online at Target for $29. 

 

As a MOH or bridesmaid, I can see where a little guidance in the way of a color or at least color family would be helpful. 

 

Agreed. I see now that I could pick out a couple of colours that would work, just to give some guidance.

[Jenny2014]

Well, in updated news, I don't need to worry about colours for two people. My best friend and MOH told me yesterday she won't be able to make it to my wedding because it was going to cost her so much money. She would have just been made a permanent teacher (finally), so it wouldn't look good for her to leave the second week into the school year. Plus, they arent going to let her use all her personal days for it, so she would be out a week's pay, plus having to pay for a substitute teacher for a week, and then paying for the trip in and of itself.

 

So my logical, understanding, brain- side of me completely and totally understands. I would never, ever, ever ask her to be out nearly $6000 for my wedding. Or potentially put her job, that she has worked so hard to get to, at risk.

 

But the emotional, this is my best friend, this is my person (like Christina and Meredith from Grey's are to each other) side of me is crushed. I just don't see how this beautiful, wonderful day will be as beautiful and wonderful without her there. I'm just sad, but I do get it and I'm not upset with her at all. It just is life, but it makes me sad.

[lgerry]

I have told my girls that I would like the dresses to be beachy and in the teal color family, but they can choose whatever style and shade in that color. That may be a good way to still have some guidance but they can still choose a shade and style that works for them.

 

Here's a couple pics to give you an idea:

 

 

 

[lgerry]

Originally Posted by Jenny2014 

 

Well, in updated news, I don't need to worry about colours for two people. My best friend and MOH told me yesterday she won't be able to make it to my wedding because it was going to cost her so much money. She would have just been made a permanent teacher (finally), so it wouldn't look good for her to leave the second week into the school year. Plus, they arent going to let her use all her personal days for it, so she would be out a week's pay, plus having to pay for a substitute teacher for a week, and then paying for the trip in and of itself.

 

So my logical, understanding, brain- side of me completely and totally understands. I would never, ever, ever ask her to be out nearly $6000 for my wedding. Or potentially put her job, that she has worked so hard to get to, at risk.

 

But the emotional, this is my best friend, this is my person (like Christina and Meredith from Grey's are to each other) side of me is crushed. I just don't see how this beautiful, wonderful day will be as beautiful and wonderful without her there. I'm just sad, but I do get it and I'm not upset with her at all. It just is life, but it makes me sad.

Awe, that's too bad. Sorry that she won't be able to make it

[shan0487]

Aww I'm so sorry to hear that- that really sucks!!! She will be with you in spirit!!

[Jenny2014]

Originally Posted by lgerry 

 

I have told my girls that I would like the dresses to be beachy and in the teal color family, but they can choose whatever style and shade in that color. That may be a good way to still have some guidance but they can still choose a shade and style that works for them.

 

Here's a couple pics to give you an idea:

 

 

 

 

Yeah, that looks really nice

[Jenny2014]

Originally Posted by lgerry 

 

Awe, that's too bad. Sorry that she won't be able to make it

 

Yeah, it's sitting heavy with me today. But it is what it is, and she still want's to be involved in everything she can be leading up to the day.

 

Originally Posted by shan0487 

 

Aww I'm so sorry to hear that- that really sucks!!! She will be with you in spirit!!

 

Thanks love. I know she will be- she want's me to somehow find a way to skype the whole day, so she can be there at least online haha. Reminds me of that commercial about the girl getting married and her dad being on the computer.

[shan0487]

Originally Posted by Jenny2014 

 

 

Yeah, it's sitting heavy with me today. But it is what it is, and she still want's to be involved in everything she can be leading up to the day.

 

 

Thanks love. I know she will be- she want's me to somehow find a way to skype the whole day, so she can be there at least online haha. Reminds me of that commercial about the girl getting married and her dad being on the computer.

You'll figure something out!! At least she can be involved with everything leading up to the big day..and hey you never know- with your wedding still over a year away- a lot of things can change between now and then!

[Jenny2014]

Originally Posted by shan0487 

 

You'll figure something out!! At least she can be involved with everything leading up to the big day..and hey you never know- with your wedding still over a year away- a lot of things can change between now and then!

 

I know! I'm going to sit on it for a few months, see how I feel about "promoting" my now only bridesmaid to Matron of Honour. Elisha will and always be my first and only choice for Maid of Honour, but Kandis just might fit the bill for Matron (it also helps that she lives only 45 minutes away, instead of Elisha's 3 provinces away.... and she just got married in the Bahama's this past August, so her brain is still set to wedding planning). Your absolutely right, I may find someone else to be my bridesmaid. But I am completely fine with just having the one person be there, and then having a "flat" Elisha there, either through technology (read: Skype), or through a picture/ whatnot.

 

I know things could change for Elisha too, but that would make me more sad, if she could suddenly come and it was because something happened with her job.