What's the Best Wedding Advice You've Ever Given/Gotten?

[shan0487]

Here are my pieces of advice:

 

1) Do not pick your bridal party too early- if you get engaged longer than a year before your wedding wait until at least the year mark or less.  I learned this from my friends as they picked their bridal party too early and there was at least one person they wish they would have included and or gotten rid of once the big day got closer.

 

2) It is your day and it does only matter what you want.  When you get those No's back your heart does sink and you get disappointed- but when you are in Mexico or wherever your wedding is- you forgot about those people that didn't come.  My motto for my wedding was "It's their loss"  they have to hear about how much fun we had in Mexico for the rest of their lives- sucks for them haha.  Don't sweat the small stuff- if you do not get in contact with your onsite wedding coordinator a week or a month before you wedding- don't worry- it will all work out- these ladies are AMAZING and this is their job and they will make all your dreams come true!!!

 

3) I def agree with Allie    Pick a good photographer- your pictures are all you have after your wedding is over- I love looking at my 800 plus photos.  And keep in mind it might actually be cheaper to fly a photographer from your hometown vs hiring local to your wedding location.  I contacted a few local photographers from home and asked if they would be interested if doing a destination wedding! I ended up getting a photographer for 3 days with a TTD session, some rehersal dinner shots and ALL day and night wedding coverage (10 am to 10pm) for the same price as I would have gotten a Cancun photographer for 6 hours on the wedding day.  So don't be scared to ask!!! Oh and she did our engagement photos at home so we got to know her a little bit better before our big day and that was also included.

 

4) I recommend this which is something we were not able to do because we were married in Nov and my husband started a new job in Sept so he did not have much vacation time- but def take a couple days after the wedding and switch resorts or make everyone leave the resort and stay longer.  We spent a week in mexico- and about 12 people stayed the full week with us and the rest of the people (we had 39 total) stayed for 5 nights and we did not get any alone time as we didn't stay longer than our guests.  I feel like I got cheated out of my honeymoon as we felt obligated to eat and hang out with our guests the entire time.  So the hubby better be taking me on a "honeymoon" for our one year anniversary!

[CourtandMatt]

Originally Posted by alexisinjamaica 

 

 

Best advice I could give: based on my planning thus far, I'd say don't bother putting postage on your RSVP cards. I took the time to pre-address and stamp them, and some people are still too lazy to drop them in the mail. I don't get it. I think it's rude. And that was a waste of money for me!

 

Alexis - Same issue!  I really wish we had not wasted our money on RSVP cards and especially on postage.  We sent out around 95 invites and only got 30 something back.   Really?? How hard is it to put a pre-stamped card in the mail box???    Another piece of planning advice:  don't waste money on invitations.  I think we spent way too much money on something that ended up getting thrown away.  One of my cousins even told me that her husband threw it away as soon as they got it since they knew they weren't coming!  What a waste!  Don't spend money on the invitations and instead spend the money on spoiling your guests that do come! 

[shan0487]

I sent out Save the Dates to everyone in the end of Jan/ beginning of Feb- everyone had to put their initial $50 deposit down by the end of Feb so by March we knew who was going who wasn't.  We did end up having 3 couples cancel in May when the flight prices came out and then a couple book late in August.  But we send boarding pass invitations to those who were coming to the wedding, I made cheap invitations on Vistaprint for all those who were not coming to let them know we were having an open house in 2013.  We did not include RSVP's as we already knew who was coming and who wasn't when the invitations went out in Sept!

[LKocelko]

Originally Posted by Billandstina 

 

I just remembered that I have to do RSVP's because we need to know food choices! I would have them respond on our website but there's no option for them to tell us what they want. How tacky would it be to not sent RSVP's and call everyone?? Lololol

What wedding site do you have? Ours is through The Knot and you can RSVP food options there.

[alexisinjamaica]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CourtandMatt 

 

Alexis - Same issue!  I really wish we had not wasted our money on RSVP cards and especially on postage.  We sent out around 95 invites and only got 30 something back.   Really?? How hard is it to put a pre-stamped card in the mail box???    Another piece of planning advice:  don't waste money on invitations.  I think we spent way too much money on something that ended up getting thrown away.  One of my cousins even told me that her husband threw it away as soon as they got it since they knew they weren't coming!  What a waste!  Don't spend money on the invitations and instead spend the money on spoiling your guests that do come! 

 

 

 

Yep, totally agree. We sent out about 80 invites and got maybe 20 back. We had to just email everyone else because we really need a headcount and the deposits as we're getting close. So far we have 32 people who say they are coming but they definitely didn't all RSVP. I just would never think of doing that, especially to someone I consider a friend, so it baffles me that people really are too lazy to bother checking a box and dropping the card in the mail when everything else has been done for them!

 

Love your idea of just spoiling the guests that do come. Future brides take note!

[Billandstina]

Well y'all have convinced me but let's see if I can convince my very traditional parents (who are still blown away by the AI concept! Lol)

[gilkes]

I agree I only got about 20 RSVPS back and have 90 guests attending!

 

But the best advice I have gotten and am now giving is remember this:

It shouldn't be all about the wedding...it's about the marriage!

I think sometimes people get so caught up in the excitemnt of planning the wedding they forget that its only one day...the marriage is hopefully for a lifetime!

[alexisinjamaica]

Originally Posted by shan0487 

 

Here are my pieces of advice:

 

1) Do not pick your bridal party too early- if you get engaged longer than a year before your wedding wait until at least the year mark or less.  I learned this from my friends as they picked their bridal party too early and there was at least one person they wish they would have included and or gotten rid of once the big day got closer.

 

2) It is your day and it does only matter what you want.  When you get those No's back your heart does sink and you get disappointed- but when you are in Mexico or wherever your wedding is- you forgot about those people that didn't come.  My motto for my wedding was "It's their loss"  they have to hear about how much fun we had in Mexico for the rest of their lives- sucks for them haha.  Don't sweat the small stuff- if you do not get in contact with your onsite wedding coordinator a week or a month before you wedding- don't worry- it will all work out- these ladies are AMAZING and this is their job and they will make all your dreams come true!!!

 

3) I def agree with Allie    Pick a good photographer- your pictures are all you have after your wedding is over- I love looking at my 800 plus photos.  And keep in mind it might actually be cheaper to fly a photographer from your hometown vs hiring local to your wedding location.  I contacted a few local photographers from home and asked if they would be interested if doing a destination wedding! I ended up getting a photographer for 3 days with a TTD session, some rehersal dinner shots and ALL day and night wedding coverage (10 am to 10pm) for the same price as I would have gotten a Cancun photographer for 6 hours on the wedding day.  So don't be scared to ask!!! Oh and she did our engagement photos at home so we got to know her a little bit better before our big day and that was also included.

 

4) I recommend this which is something we were not able to do because we were married in Nov and my husband started a new job in Sept so he did not have much vacation time- but def take a couple days after the wedding and switch resorts or make everyone leave the resort and stay longer.  We spent a week in mexico- and about 12 people stayed the full week with us and the rest of the people (we had 39 total) stayed for 5 nights and we did not get any alone time as we didn't stay longer than our guests.  I feel like I got cheated out of my honeymoon as we felt obligated to eat and hang out with our guests the entire time.  So the hubby better be taking me on a "honeymoon" for our one year anniversary!

 

These are all great tips!!

[JovienCO]

Originally Posted by gilkes 

 

I agree I only got about 20 RSVPS back and have 90 guests attending!

 

But the best advice I have gotten and am now giving is remember this:

It shouldn't be all about the wedding...it's about the marriage!

I think sometimes people get so caught up in the excitemnt of planning the wedding they forget that its only one day...the marriage is hopefully for a lifetime!

 

I think your advice about ultimately...it's about the marriage...is so on point.  I know a lot of people who do get lost in planning the wedding and forget the bigger picture of everthing.

[Jenny2014]

Originally Posted by JovienCO 

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by gilkes 

 

I agree I only got about 20 RSVPS back and have 90 guests attending!

 

But the best advice I have gotten and am now giving is remember this:

It shouldn't be all about the wedding...it's about the marriage!

I think sometimes people get so caught up in the excitemnt of planning the wedding they forget that its only one day...the marriage is hopefully for a lifetime!

 

I think your advice about ultimately...it's about the marriage...is so on point.  I know a lot of people who do get lost in planning the wedding and forget the bigger picture of everthing.

 

Agreed completely. While we all have had our dream of what our wedding will be, and pretty much just needed the groom to fall into place to have it.... it is about the marriage and the life the two of you are creating together. It's what I keep reminding myself over and over again as I get stressed out that we aren't saving for the wedding because other things keep coming up. If all we manage to do it the courthouse marriage and a week's vacation just to the two of us... whatever! We know we did all we could, in this moment of time, and if things change later on in our lives and we can do a bigger wedding, or whatnot, then so be it!