Dress Dilemma- Am I Crazy?!

alexisinjamaica · August 6, 2012

So in April of this year I purchased a Vera Wang for David's Bridal dress http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_V-Neck-Soft-A-Line-Gown-with-Hand-Appliqued-Lace-VW351021_Bridal-Gowns-Shop-By-Designer-White-by-Vera-Wang (without the crazy huge belt) that I later had second thoughts on. Luckily because the store messed up and forgot to send in the order to the designer, they let me cancel it and refunded my money. Just a few weeks ago in July I purchased this Sottero and Midgley dress http://www.sotteroandmidgley.com/dress.aspx?style=ASM3588&page=0&pageSize=16&keywordText=&keywordType=All (again, without the sash or the bolero) and now I'm having second thoughts on this one, too. But it's already been ordered and paid for in full. Am I crazy if I look for a third dress? I now think I don't want lace and instead want a mermaid in a light fabric, like organza, with rouching on the top that's fitted and then goes out into something fun and flirty. Anyone else purchased more than one dress? Or even two, like me?!

AllieH · August 7, 2012

I really, really like your 2nd dress! I don't think it'll be too hot or anything else. I think you can make this one more fun and flirty with a cute belt or your bouquet or other accessories.

Do you remember how you felt when you had it on? What made you say "this is it!"?

I had a lot of second thoughts about my dress once I ordered it, but when it came in, and I put it on again, I remember why I fell in love with it in the first place.

That said, if you don't think it's the right dress, then by all means, keep looking!! it's not a day for compromise...

pacificgirl · August 7, 2012

I absolutely LOVE the Sottero and Midgley! I don't blame you at all, I've been through a few gowns myself. What I would suggest is that you go back in and try on the Sottero and Midgley gown and see how you feel in it. Can you see yourself getting married in it?

I had the same problem as you, and it's just due to my indecisive nature, personally. I never had that "AHA!" moment that so many brides get, but when I had the dress on I looked at myself on the stage in the salon under all of the lights, closed my eyes, and could really see myself walking down the aisle to my fiance.

Last November, I had begun to pay off a Lazaro sample, changed my mind. I bought a Maggie for $1k at a sale, changed my mind again, and took FI's aunt and cousin with me the last time and that really made me feel good about my decision was having that reassurance.

If you can't see that, then it may be worth it to try for another dress. If it comes to that, consider trying on some other styles, even if you think you don't want them. You never know what you really will wind up loving! I wanted a big, flowy ballgown and ended up with a fitted mermaid that is very simple.

Good luck, girl! Keep us posted on what happens!

chantal09 · August 7, 2012

It so nice to see that a lot of brides have this "dress doubt" too. I also purcased a dress with all my BM and mom then later that day I couldnt stop thinking of another dress that I saw first and loved. Luckilly I caught it in time before they ahd started to make the dress and they let me switch!

In regards to this dillemma, I looooooveeee the 2nd option. That dress is beautiful! I Think the lace and the overlay at the bottom will be perfect for the beach. Only you know how heavy it feels on, and you have to be the judge of that. As long as you feel like you wont be over heating in this 2nd dress I would stick to it! Just know its normal to have doubts!!! Good luck!

ChocoTaco7568 · August 7, 2012

I think Allie said it best and I agree 100%. While I canâ€™t say I had dress doubt, I did have a moment of regret regarding how much I paid for it (even though it came in under budget). I think itâ€™s natural reactions after purchasing the dress and kind of follows the clichÃ© â€œ the grass is always greenerâ€. Only you know what â€˜s best. I also think you should go back and try on the Sottero to see what feelings/emotions get evoked. Good luck and keep us posted.

alexisinjamaica · August 7, 2012

Originally Posted by AllieH

I really, really like your 2nd dress! I don't think it'll be too hot or anything else. I think you can make this one more fun and flirty with a cute belt or your bouquet or other accessories.

Do you remember how you felt when you had it on? What made you say "this is it!"?

I had a lot of second thoughts about my dress once I ordered it, but when it came in, and I put it on again, I remember why I fell in love with it in the first place.

That said, if you don't think it's the right dress, then by all means, keep looking!! it's not a day for compromise...

Yeah I'm hoping that once it comes in and I have my first fitting in December I'll love it again. It's just such a big purchase, and the pictures are forever, so I'm being even more indecisive than usual!

alexisinjamaica · August 7, 2012

I'm glad to hear others have had this issue too! I think part of my problem is that while dress hunting I was so set on lace, that it's really all I tried on. Seeing other brides in beautiful mermaid styles with fun ruffles at the bottom just makes me curious how it'd look on me and since I never really tried any on I can't rule them out just yet. I might just look casually with my best friend/MOH one day, and hopefully they look horrible on me and I can move on and keep the Maggie Sottero, which I do really like! Thanks girls for the input. Will let you know how it turns out.

Kassi22 · August 7, 2012

Iâ€™m one of the most indecisive people in the world, I swear!

Because of this I would be scared to try on anymore dresses. As much as I still look at pictures (which I really shouldnâ€™t) of other dresses, that I think â€œwhy didnâ€™t I try that one on!â€ I will never try on anymore as I would be afraid to like another one other than the one I have purchased, which I love. I wouldnâ€™t purchase a second dress (just not worth the money to me) and I canâ€™t return the one I have, so I would rather just avoid the situation.

The Maggie is beautiful! I do agree that you should go try it on again and see how you feel. I personally wouldnâ€™t taint my opinion on it by trying on any other dresses until you re-try this one on. If you try it on, and you donâ€™t love it, then go try on others!

Or, if you can purchase two dresses, then go for it! Have one for the ceremony and one for the reception J

wallabymeisje · August 11, 2012

i love your second dress it is beautiful i would go try it on again i was having major dress doubt in the months waiting for my dress to come in but when it finally came in i knew she was the right one for me

alexisinjamaica · September 3, 2012

Update ladies! I ended up going to a discount bridal shop in LA that has designer sample gowns straight off the runway for up to 75% off. I found this Jim Hjelm http://www.jlmcouture.com/Jim-Hjelm/Bridal/Spring/2012/Style-8208, which I didn't love on the hanger but ended up loving when I put it on. It looks heavy/like a lot for the beach but it's actually pretty lightweight and I'm thinking of removing the tulle from the bottom so it's not quite as poofy. So...third time's a charm! This is dress #3 and now hopefully the other bridal shop will let me cancel my order and I'll only be out the deposit, or I'll just keep it if they're going to keep all my money (I paid in full already) and try to sell it online. Stay tuned-- that Maggie Sottero may be available for purchase!

Here's a pic of me in the dress, but keep in mind this is a sample size and I am not. Haha. Need to either lose some in the hip/butt area or get it taken out a bit.