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What to register for... and where??...


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Anything offered should be accepted with grace and gratitude. If you've stated up front that you don't expect gifts (from anyone, much less those who travel with you), and they still offer a gift, then  that is their decision, and I wouldn't make a scene or awkward moment by refusing it. 

 

Originally Posted by Kel123073 View Post

Actually they were yelling at me in regards to a wedding gift at the reception.  A lot of friends told me not to expect a gift but if someone gives an envelope then you just accept it.  As far as the bridal shower, my mom is insisiting on throwing me one, especially since many people will not attend a destination wedding.  I was okay with that, but kind of feel like we shouldn't accept an envelope at the reception.  If someone spends that amount of money to attend the wedding, I definitely think that this is their gift to us.

 

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 Omg I would never cause an awkward moment or a scene!  Sorry if I gave that type of impression.  We were thinking of putting something on the invitation stating that your presence is your gift.  That is when my friends intervened and said to just accept a gift if someone offers it.

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Hey Britney! As you know, we've been living together for 5 years and bought our home together 2 years ago, so conventional regiestries didn't really work for us. We actually signed up with simpleregistry.com, which is a cash registry but very tactful and enables you to list big ticket items and have people contribute in a way that's financially comfortable for them and at least they know they that they're helping you achieive a much larger goal/gift that better suits your needs than a set of towels.  Check it out, I know you said you didn't want to ask for cash, but it's an option that may work for the two of you and other BDW brides who are reading this.

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Bubbles- I swear we always have the same concerns & questions! LOL

I am having the same dilemma. My mother & BM's insist I need a shower and have to register- but I am living with my FI for 2 years now.

I've asked my friends & parents for advice, and they suggested putting just some around the house "updates" we could use. So things like a comforter [we still have a full for our new king bed], maybe some new pots & pans, or some kitchen gadgets/utensils. Other than that, some smaller options could be: cleaning supplies, mops/brooms, decorative frames [perhaps some wedding inspired ones for the big day!]. I was also thinking of maybe asking for fun stuff like gluten-free cookbooks [i've been diagnosed with Celiac for almost 2 yrs] and even some gluten-free goodie bags [cake mixes, baking products, etec]. I'm just trying to think of anything we could really use and not have our friends & family buying us things we'll never need.

I would say Bed, Bath, & Beyond and maybe Macy's, and maybe even put Home Depot gift cards down if you have any "fixer-uppers"

 

One really cool site I heard about was My Registry- Where you can add anything from any store onto one main registry, online! So guests can shop online and go to any site to purchase what you need. I like this idea, b/c I personally LOVE Ikea and since they don't offer a registry, this is a great way to put lots of little things on the list I wouldn't be able to otherwise =)

 

http://www.myregistry.com/wedding-Registry.aspx?gclid=CKa20_69xrACFQjf4AoduRJaUw

 

Hope this helps

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Hi Kel!

I was wondering the same! This is how I feel: Guests that are coming to your DW will know you and your FI appreciate them making the effort & spending the money to join you. I went to a DW in Jamaica with my FI for a cousin's wedding. They didn't expect a dollar, yet most of the guests gave them something. Later we found out [through the grapevine] some gave whatever they could [$50 or a gift card], others gave large sums of money, a few gave nothing. So know your guests understand that YOU understand what they're doing to make being a guest possible. So if they want to give you something, that's completely up to them. If not, they know you appreciate just them being there. So even if you don't put that statement, I'm sure guests will look into "the ettiquette" of it if they're questioning it.

 

Hope that didn't confuse you LOL Don't know how to say it any more clear haha!

 

Originally Posted by Kel123073 View Post

We are in a similar situation. We live together and at first wasn't sure what we would register for. But towels, sheets, glassware, new dinnerware, and pots and pans are what we came up with too! Several people gave me suggestions but I don't feel comfortable registering for my honeymoon! A down payment on a house fund is a cute idea but I don't feel comfortable since guests will be incurring quite an expense to travel for our wedding.
Actually I was also considering stating on invitation that your presence is your gift for those that attend the wedding! Some friends were yelling at me! What do u ladies think about this?
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I'm in a similar situation, being already settled in a home and having a lot of typical wedding gift stuff.  We are going to register for some updated stuff, pretty much what has already been mentioned - pots & pans, towels, bedding, etc.  In addition to that a friend of mine made a suggestion that I thought was helpful.  She suggested keeping in mind additional stuff you may need if you plan to move into a bigger home anytime soon.  She said they lived in a small apartment when they got married so they kept the registry small, but wished she had thought ahead and registered for items for an additional bathroom or bedroom, for example.   I've also been told not to shy away from the more expensive items, because sometimes groups of people like to chip in for a bigger item.  I know my friends and I have done that for weddings and baby showers before. 

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@JennyBenz.... thank you :)  That was very well said!  I think that is exactly how we are going to handle it!  We are also in the same boat regarding living together for 2 years now, and really just needing some updates!  I love the idea of the website where you can register for anything from any store on one website.  Definitely gonna check it out!

kelly

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Originally Posted by AllieH View Post

 

We aren't including registry info in our invites at all - I've been told by wedding gurus that it's a big no-no. I included it on our website (and our invites do have an insert with our website on it), but also said that for those going with us to Mexico, their presence is all we need. 

 

 

that's a great list!!! do you have a simple human trash can? I love those darn things....lol 

 

 

 I agree, we wont add this on our invites either.. We'll just tell people if they insist and on our website for our AHR guests.. But I def wish I could just pack everyone up and take them to our DW with us!!.. Their presence is more than plenty for me!! :o)

 

Simple Human treash can?.... what is that?

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Originally Posted by ChocoTaco7568 View Post

 

Hey Britney! As you know, we've been living together for 5 years and bought our home together 2 years ago, so conventional regiestries didn't really work for us. We actually signed up with simpleregistry.com, which is a cash registry but very tactful and enables you to list big ticket items and have people contribute in a way that's financially comfortable for them and at least they know they that they're helping you achieive a much larger goal/gift that better suits your needs than a set of towels.  Check it out, I know you said you didn't want to ask for cash, but it's an option that may work for the two of you and other BDW brides who are reading this.

 Thanks girl for sharing.. I'll share this with my fiance and get his thoughts.. We seem to already have all the big items we could possibly need or want though.. His family insisted that we register for small things for the guests that want to buy us gifts. But I will def check it out. Thanks!   What type of items did yall do?

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