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Fiances Help


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best to ask him how involved he wants to be and in what aspects. Mine only wanted to be a part of the gift registry, food, drinks, venue, photographer and how was part of the bridal party

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My Fi has been similar to Cherany - couldn't be bothered with trawling through lots of things, much prefers me to narrow it down and then he helps choose. Think that it's always good to ask the question as to how much they want to be involved - I think too often it gets assumed its all about the bride, and I really think they should be given the option as it is their big day too.
+1... I have a bit of an obsessive personality and my Fi tends to get overwhelmed with excessive details. So o pretty much present 2-3 options to him for us to discuss and choose from. But he has been involved and has an opinion on everything, he just let's me do all the upfront research - wedding venue, photographer, colors/theme, invites, professional song- the only two he doesn't care about is decor and my wedding dress.
I think it can vary by the fiance.  Speaking from a grooms standpoint, I do care about the details of the wedding but I also know that she has been dreaming of this moment since she was a little girl.  So I will give input but in the back of your mind, don't you already know what you want? 
I am actually among the group of brides who hasn't been planning my wedding day since I was littl. The only thing I knew prior to my engagement is that I'm not traditional and never wanted to marry in a church. .
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My wedding planning process has looked much like most of yours — in the beginning I went a little crazy with the details and the researching, while my fiancé just chimed in with his opinion when he had one.  We decided all the big things together (venue, date, guest list), but I was on my own with the details. 

 

Honestly though, I think the men are smart.  Wouldn't you like to have someone doing all the research for the venues, photographers, decorations, music, etc., and then present you with three or four great options?  I know I would.  They know that if they don't do the work, we will.  Sneaky!

 

After I realized this, I decided to chill out, do nothing, and see what would happen.  What happened is that my fiancé started getting nervous about sending out the STD's on time, and he finished them up and sent them out while I looked over his shoulder and had a glass of wine.  Awesome!  So ladies, if you want your fiancé to do more work, I recommend that you take the initiative and do less. 

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Originally Posted by ChocoTaco7568 View Post

I am actually among the group of brides who hasn't been planning my wedding day since I was littl. The only thing I knew prior to my engagement is that I'm not traditional and never wanted to marry in a church.

 

+1 for the non-traditional, not-wedding obsessed brides!

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I'm finding that my fiance is pretty much leaving it up to me, but at the same time he has opinions on things I wouldn't think he would care about at all. I was working on the postcards we are including with the STD's (they have info about the group booking, etc.) on the front it is just a picture of the resort and the name (Now Sapphire Riviera Cancun) - he just happened to come into the room and looked at it and told me that he hated the font that "Now Sapphire" was written in - and that he'd rather it be a little bigger and not in bold. Seriously??? He doesn't have any opinion on the colors, flowers, etc. but he has a problem with the font????

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  • 2 weeks later...

LOL Seems like all of you ladies have a general concensus haha! My FI cares about the financial aspects, other than that he's good for a "yes" or "no", and most of the time it's "whatever you want honey". Sometimes I tell him it would be nice for more feedback, but I understand that he just doesn't care about flowers or colors haha But when you really want him to be a part of something, speak up! We sometimes forget to ask when we may be overwhelmed or stressed out, it's good to know there's always someone next to you. =)

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  • 3 weeks later...

My fiance isnt that involved at all - ill run ideas past him and he doesnt have many strong opinions either way

 

3 things he insisted on

- no pink

- no personalised M&Ms - he hates them with a passion (no idea why, i LOVE them)

- no blue glasses (there were two options - clear and blue)

 

everything else hes happy enough to let me decide so i think i can manage to avoid 3 three things he doesnt want (though i yearn for those M&MS haha)

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My FI has been very involved. We spent four hours together on the computer designing the boarding pass invatations and the jackets. He has even made trips to the craft store with me. I am the kind of person who has not been planning this day forever, so if it were all up to me it would be much simpiler. I was going to do a regular wedding invite but once he saw the boarding pass kind he was insistant that we do those.

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Originally Posted by lkterry View Post

 

Wow.  Since he went out of his way to come home w/ a card box...he must be somewhat interested.  That's great.  I don't think my FI cares that much.  If I ask his opinion, he'll give one...but I can tell he doesn't love me droaning on and on about stuff...lol

This is the same as my FI I can get an opinion out of him but I can tell that he isn't really interested in giving it. 

 

Also if I go on and on and on he gets a bit annoyed...sorta like I do with his sports lol

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