May 2013 Brides

[Dazeydawl]

Originally Posted by MissBubbles205 

 

 Thank you ) and thanks for the ideas. I have been buying dresses on ebay to see what I like.. lol.. <---Ebay addict here. The orange at Davids bridal is exactly our color orange.. I just bought a watermelon dress from Ebay, it should arrive this week so I can see if that color matches our pink..  but otherwise I may pick out a simple orange dress from DB and find someone with our color pink for the sash and might have to die some shoes unless I get lucky. these ideas just came to me, I'll have to share them with my girls. ) the one with the request is super tan, lucky girl!!! So she will look great in any color.

 

I'm now wishing I would have went with something more simple.. BM dresses are a toughy..

Lol also addicted to ebay! Been buying so much since wedding planning started! You can usually get any color you want in dyeable shoes so that should be too difficult.

[danak71]

Originally Posted by Emily11386 

 

Ladies I have a question for you,

So we are considering doing a catamaran tour for our guests. The only problem is we don't want to do it the day before or after the wedding which is a Friday. So we were thinking of doing Wednesday, however my family, his parents, and his groomsmen will all be there but none of my 6 bridesmaids would be. It definitely wouldn't be as fun for me without them there and I don't want anyone to feel left out, so we are debating if it's worth doing it. I'm so confused. I don't know if we should go ahead with the catamaran or if we should do a private dinner the night before so everyone is included.

I had the same dilemma! We wanted to take everyone out on a catamaran but we have people coming in on Wednesday and Thursday and our wedding is Saturday; so we're definitely going to do it on Friday. We finally came to the conclusion that it wouldn't be fair to take our guests on an excursion to say thank you for their love and support and not make sure that everyone could participate.

[cinnagirl]

Originally Posted by MissBubbles205 

 

 I know they really don't now, it made me lose a little respect for them, and I honestly thought they were the top 5 of dependable, honest people. I spoke to my FI, he seemed a little upset as I would if my best friend did something like that to me. I def feel for him.

 OH MY.. ( It's sad to see things like this happen with our own people that we consider best friends, or even fmaily. I'm very sorry to hear what happened in your situation with her being soo flaky. Def not a true best friend and I'm glad you were able to find your true friends in the process!  I too totally understand the money issues, and I wont ask anyone of their financials, if they want to be there, then I will be overjoyed and very appreciative. I'd rather them tell me they are sorry and the honest reason why they can't/don't want to come. For all I care they could say they don't want to save up and spend that kind of money for a place we chose. I just hate to hear everyone fall back on the excuse of "we can't afford it that kind of thing" when they have had well over a years notice.

 

I've suggested to my friends who want to honestly come, to save $100 a week from their paychecks. My FI and I have done this and we have come up with soo much money soo fast. Booked our travels $3011, Photog $2600, My Dress, $1000 and the best part we haven't even missed the money.

Ugggghh, I hate that excuse too that "we can't afford it". One of my bridesmaids bailed due to money issues a few months back (money issues in the sense that she didn't want to cut back on eating out all the time in order to be able to go). I got a message from one of my Maid of Honors over the weekend asking if she could book her trip outside of the group because she wouldn't be able to save up the money in time for the start of January when the final payment is due. She still hasn't paid her deposit and it was due a month ago! Never mind the fact that by the time the final payment is actually due, she would have had a full year to save up. 

 

If she had mentioned a few months ago that she was having problems and didn't know if she could pay the full amount, I would not have hesitated to help her out. It is so important to me that she be there. But she brought up the whole "no money" issue a month after deposit was due, after she had just got back from a trip to Cuba. Yeah, she went on a trip to Cuba and now she has no money. I've been livid for the past week.

[CourtandMatt]

Wow.  Sadly, I am happy to know that there are so many of us going through a similar friend/family issue.  I have to say the one thing that is keeping me sane through all the drama is that I am truly happy if only my mom and brother are there and I know 100% that they will be.  I just keep saying that the rest of our guests are just a bonus. 

 

 

BTW - I am so jealous of all of you who have guests booked.  My friends and family travel ALL the time, they talk about going, but only 1 room has been reserved (and it was one of my mom's friends who I don't know)!   I assume they are all waiting for the invitation, which hopefully will come out soon.  But, really?  Man o man. I hope people get their act together soon.  I set the deposit due date for December 15 (some people thought November 15 was too soon). 

[ChocoTaco7568]

Originally Posted by CourtandMatt 

 

Wow.  Sadly, I am happy to know that there are so many of us going through a similar friend/family issue.  I have to say the one thing that is keeping me sane through all the drama is that I am truly happy if only my mom and brother are there and I know 100% that they will be.  I just keep saying that the rest of our guests are just a bonus. 

 

 

BTW - I am so jealous of all of you who have guests booked.  My friends and family travel ALL the time, they talk about going, but only 1 room has been reserved (and it was one of my mom's friends who I don't know)!   I assume they are all waiting for the invitation, which hopefully will come out soon.  But, really?  Man o man. I hope people get their act together soon.  I set the deposit due date for December 15 (some people thought November 15 was too soon). 

+1... When we first started planning our wedding, our guest list only consisted of our parents and our siblings (less my dad b/c he's not deserving of an invite). The only person that we truly care about that might not be able to make it is my brother.  He's in the military, and even though our specific locations doesn't have any travel advisory, he still has to ask for permission to travel to Mexico. Initially he wasn't going to ask and was just going to come, but he's in the midst of completing his Masters and is up for a promo in the spring. My wedding just isn't worth jeopardizing that especially since it's highly unlikely that he would be denied his request. My fingers are crossed, because I have also asked him to be or officiant.

 

At some point we decided to open it up to friends but with no expectation that any of them would come. Time will tell.  One couple has already declined since they’re expecting in February (understandable). And another couple that was seemingly excited about coming just got engaged two nights ago.  I think that’s why we didn't bother with STDs and we don't plan on sending any kind of reminder.  We're not going to babysit people in this process; if it's not their priority, then it won't be ours. We figure if it's important for them to be there, then they'll do what they need to do in order to make it happen.

[Tulumbride2013]

Well said choco. If its not their priority, it won't be mine either.

[uhura526]

I too am jealous of all those who have several guests booked already.

 

I know this is the May 2013 bridal thread and I am getting married in April BUT there isn't really a thread like this on here for people getting married in Apirl and we've got similar deadlines and such and I want to bond with other destination wedding brides.  I also wanted to throw my hat in to those who are experiencing anxiety about bookings for the wedding.  The time will come when RSVP's are due and we'll all want to punch some people in the throat.  I have not sent out invites yet but I have sent out STDs and so far I've got 4 rooms booked and one of those is ours lol  We've got my mom and dad, my matron of honor and best man (they are married to each other) and my FI's stepmom and her boyfriend..(yes it's a long story).  Anyway, I am in the same boat as you Courtney (we also both live in DC!)  and my family travels a lot (his does not ..in fact we have ongoing drama with his mom about getting her passport taken care of) but not one of them has booked yet with the exception of my parents.  I should be just happy with the group we have as they are the closest people to us, but still, I wish people were more on top of this and just at least book their rooms at the extremely discounted rates we blocked off for the guests. 

[MissBubbles205]

Choco, very very well said! Not their priority, then not mine. Of course I want everyone to be there, but if they don't want to be, then that's on them. I was considering a reminder in our Christmas cards, but I really don't think we will. Why should I go to the expense of extra stationary if it gets overlooked and ignored. And I really hope your brother gets to come! I don't see any reason for them to decline his request! )

 

Uhura, you are more than welcome to bond with us May girls ) I too wish our guests were on the ball and making any types of arrangements. We have 1 room booked, ours!  and only one person has contacted our Travel Agent. My bridesmaid whom I have known since I was 2, which was honestly the last person I expected to go. My invites have been out for almost 2 weeks. 2 have confirmed via our RSVP card and mailed it to us, but no contact with the TA.   I need all of you ladies secrets!!

 

I to am sad to see everyone have dilemmas with guests that are friends and family, but I'm happy to know I'm not the only one wanting to throat choke people! lol. I would never do that, but I hate thinking it at times. lol

[melnryluvco]

Originally Posted by CourtandMatt 

 

 

It is interesting how people's true colors really do come out when it comes to weddings and, in particular, destination weddings.  My former best friend (she has become a former best friend through this process) told me right after getting engaged, "you better not be doing a destination wedding."  Then, we picked a date and place and she goes, "I guess I will have to come by myself and it will be so expensive because [her now fiance] may have job by then and probably wont be able to get off of work."  BTW, this was Jan 2012 and I still don't think he has a job.  Then, we change the date because we wanted to find a cheaper date (it was like $100 cheaper per person to switch from April to May for a three night package), and she goes "I can't go.  I will have finals then."  She hadn't even gotten into law school by then!   So long story short: I no longer consider her a friend.  I don't mind if people can't make it because of a legitimate excuse: (1) money; (2) illness; (3) what not.  But, she was looking for an excuse not to come.  And, after all of this, she got engaged and of course is going on a super expensive honeymoon to Mauritius and Tanzania around the same time as my wedding. 

 

My point of this story is (1) we will all find out who our true friends are and (2) we have to do what is best for us, which is a destination wedding.  I am truly not that sad about the loss of her as a friend.  Instead, I am so happy about finding my true friends - the ones that told me "what are you doing looking at venues in the U.S., we know you have always wanted a destination wedding."  They knew me better than I knew myself. 

 

Wow! Yeah I would thank god she showed her true colors before it was too late instead of leading you on to believe she was going to to be there every step of the way and then back last minute leaving you in between a rock and a hard place. Sorry friend! I know you'll have a beautiful wedding surrouned by true love and hapiness of friends and family.

[melnryluvco]

Originally Posted by Emily11386 

 

Ladies I have a question for you,

So we are considering doing a catamaran tour for our guests. The only problem is we don't want to do it the day before or after the wedding which is a Friday. So we were thinking of doing Wednesday, however my family, his parents, and his groomsmen will all be there but none of my 6 bridesmaids would be. It definitely wouldn't be as fun for me without them there and I don't want anyone to feel left out, so we are debating if it's worth doing it. I'm so confused. I don't know if we should go ahead with the catamaran or if we should do a private dinner the night before so everyone is included.

Is there any way to do both? Would your parents and his welcome the idea of hosting the dinner and then doing the catamaran as your treat? If not I say don't hold back on something that is fun and will make your and your FI's DW more memoriable. Yes you will miss not having them there but the whole point of the trip is to make new and fun memories with your FH. Best of Luck!