Hush hush legal ceremony

[leigh3124]

Our wedding is in Mexico in June. We are doing the legal ceremony here first and having symbolic in Mexico. FI is well connected, so he is asking the lieutenant governor to do it on the steps of the capitol building. We will only invite our parents and our dog (who obviously can't go to Mexico). We will not exchange rings or do the other emotional stuff, but will go out to dinner afterward. We like this idea because we are having a Jewish ceremony and one of the requirements in Mexico is that all legal ceremonies be conducted in Spanish. We thought having a Spanish-Hebrew-English wedding would be too confusing. We have a close friend who will conduct our Jewish ceremony in Mexico under the chuppa! Our wedding in Mexico will be our anniversary.

[bride81]

We are too going to the courthouse to avoid blood tests and more costs.  I told the MIL and I think we are going to invite both set of parents to be there and have dinner afterwards.  But we will celebrate our anniversary on the Mexico date.  I don't really want to tell anyone else, but this seems to be a question I am asked quite often.

[stella331]

I think I want to do the legal ceremony here but am scared of people finding out. I don't want people to get annoyed that they flew all the way to Mexico and we are already legally married. I really don't want the hassle of blood tests and translations.

[sgreen99]

We are also doing this.  We talked about it, and it's just really inconvenient the stuff you have to do down there - what if something happens in your travel and you get delayed so you aren't there for 4 days prior, what if there's an issue with the paperwork etc etc.  We both agreed that it's just easier to do it here as close to the trip as we can.  We would only tell my parents (my mom would like to be our witness) and his dad.  Everything down there looks the same whether it's "real" or not.  It's still your wedding, it will still be beautiful and emotional!

[teamboyd2012]

We are getting legally married here in actual formal ceremony, with all bells and whistles, before going to DR for our DW. The reasons for this is FI's family is not coming to DR (for financial reasons) and we want them to be able to be there for our wedding. The only ppl that will be at both the legal ceremony and wedding in DR is my mom so no one will be the wiser. But, if they did ask I would tell them and I think they would completely understand as the cost and process is extra. And I get to have 2 dresses!!! LOL

[dallace]

We are also getting married at home before or after our destination wedding - wherever it may be (still haven't decided LOL). My FI refuses to let anyone take blood from him in another country. Then silly me told him a horror story I read on here. The person got there blood tests done and had a great big lump on there arm at the injection site and the person that took the blood had actually gone right through the vein. Not life threatening or anything just leaves a bit of a bruise once the lump goes down. Also when I was looking into legally doing it in Mexico it is much more expensive then to do it at home.

Not sure if we'll tell anyone except for my family...his family is a bit finnicky and might get mad we're not doing it completley legal wherever we decide to go. Since my MOH will be living to far away to attend the "legal" ceremony, I'll have my sister as a witness. Then they both stand up with me at our beach wedding!

[SunsetLove]

We kind of have the same dilemma. I don't want to tell my family that our DW is not the "real deal" (especially those that are really stretching their dollars to make it to Mexico) because I'm afraid they will be upset that they are spending so much money to come to our wedding when we are already technically "married." So when people have asked I have just told them that our DW is legit and that we just have to get our marriage license signed by a judge when we return. No one realizes what I'm really saying We plan on getting hitched at the courthouse right before we leave for MX, but our anniversary will be the date we get married on the beach!

[mzthan6]

We did the same thing.  We got "married" here legally last year Nov and we're doing our real wedding this coming Nov. 2012.

[ChocoTaco7568]

Am I the only one who plans on having the legal formality after the destination wedding? We were concerned that if we conducted the legal ceremony prior, then it would take away emotionally from the destination wedding ceremony. Any thoughts on this?

[Dominican Ally]

I think we are still getting married legally in the Dominican....BUT if things change, I would also be doing the legalities after returning so that it doesn't take anything away from the ceremony in the Dominican.
 

I think it's totally different for everyone, and it's all a matter of what feels right to each couple.

 

Originally Posted by ChocoTaco7568 

Am I the only one who plans on having the legal formality after the destination wedding? We were concerned that if we conducted the legal ceremony prior, then it would take away emotionally from the destination wedding ceremony. Any thoughts on this?