Who Pays For The Welcome Dinner?

TracyK · August 28, 2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by ncainey

We are having a welcome thing on Thursday night at Cabo Surf. I told Armando I just wanted some apps. (like nachos, quesadillas etc.) and I think we are going to have beer only for two hours. He quoted me $14 a person for the food and $17 a person for beer. It's still like $35 pp with tax. That's alot! However, we are going to do it. Still up for debate who is going to pay for it. I will not let my parents spend over what they have budgeted for our wedding so it's either us or my inlaws. I noticed someone said etiquette says the grooms family usually hosts it. I wish I could find proof of this and show my FI! Anyone know where that's at?

Try these sites....
Wedding Etiquette

The Knot - Rehearsal Dinner: The Basics

LCBride2007 · August 28, 2007

i was just going to say - almost any "wedding etiquette" book will tell you that traditionally the groom's family pays for the rehearsal dinner, and the brides family pays for the wedding and ceremony. but unless you're going by total tradidion, which most of us aren't (a DW is hardly traditional in most cases) then not sure you can waive that over his head!

starchild · August 29, 2007

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ryjaxs19

I might look into actually hosting something but I dont want my guests to feel like the whole vacation is about US, I want to make sure I give them enough space, so if I just casually say lets meet up rather than host and pay for something it might be received as a little less intrusive on their vacation.

I know what you're saying here, I thought about this too. A few of my guests didn't land in PV until like 3 hours before the WD so I worried that it would be hectic for them to rush around to go to our dinner. In the end, my aunt & uncle's room wasn't ready (for some reason) so they got to the hotel and had to use the hospitality suite to get changed for the dinner,leave their luggage there, and get right back in a cab.

I felt bad because they really rushed, but they had a great time at the dinner. Plus my aunt said they were going to eat dinner anyway so why not be with us. They were glad they got to meet everyone and see another side of town (where the restaurant was).

ncainey · August 29, 2007

My inlaws are nice enough to pay for the Friday night rehearsal dinner at Baja Cantina along with the two buses it takes to shuttle everyone there. I think that will be atleast a couple thousand. So I guess they are paying a fair amount! My parents and me and my FI are paying for everything else, so we may have to end up splurging for the Thurs. Welcome Party

gkashmira · August 29, 2007

Honestly, I think that if you can't afford to foot the bill (which is totally fine) then you just shouldn't have a welcome dinner at all.

We did have a welcome dinner that we invited a everyone to and paid for. However the night before we ended up going out to dinner with all our friends (like 20 of us) and just split the bill. I think if it's casual and impromptu then you can get away withh it without being cheap. If however you are planning a "welcome" dinner and expecting people to pay for themselves I think it will not be well received.

I also don't think you should put anything about it in your invite if you're not planning on paying. Just my 2 cents...