At Home Reception (AHR) Do's and Don'ts

[nikkicraig10]

Sorry @@BusyBee280!! I forget only Canada has tooneys. It's a $2 coin! So all drinks cost the guests $2. If you think of how many shots are in a 40 of hard alcohol, x $2 per shot, it should generally pay for itself. (Give or take all the mix ins and cups and what not). I have a lot of guests that heavily drink, so an open bar was just not an option for us. I know when I go to a wedding that has $2 drinks, I am more than happy with that price.

and @@stefadile - I don't think it looks cheap at all to not offer an open bar. Every now and then we go to a wedding that has a open bar, but it is generally always paid for by the parents or something. To fund free alcohol for all yours guests, all night, yourselves, is a huge extra cost to the wedding! Not to mention how much get's wasted when its "free". People grab 2 at a time, the ice melts, they toss it and go grab another one. Plus people go overboard and then they're all a drunk mess. I would suggest just having a cheaper bar, such as $2 a drink or something. (or 2 free and the rest full price or something like that)

[NixSpade]

I have left the planning of the AHR to my FI because I am currently planning my own DW as well as my sister's DW. He is looking at either a club or the church hall. Alcohol will be $2/drink, we are providing catered appies and dessert, and Since FI is a dj and has tons of dj friends/family there will be a dj. We will be having my son nephew taking the pictures (I think) and hoping to keep this all under $2000.00. We will probably be doing this closer to christmas as we are getting married in Oct 2015. 

[becassidy]

we really went (and continue to) go back and forth on this...

 

1. we are spending as little as possible! we want our lives together to be where th money goes, not one or two days. but enough to be confortable.

 

2. Since my vote for a winery/brewery got axed b/c its 1500$ and yo uhave to do everyhting... were doing a 100$ banquet hall, my moms friend is bartending, and were making an ipod playlist. so its pretty informal, but i made the dress a resort formal, I want to wear my dress for some of it, and I want other to wear nice clothes, no jeans! the good thing about the hall is we dont have a time limit, so we're doing 5pm till.

 

3. Our wedding is April 16, our AHR is May 16.

 

4. We're doing tables with small meals, like burger and pulled pork sliders, pasta, potatoes, small meals and snacky food. we're also doing a smoores bar (my new last name will be moore).

 

5. I am going to start in my dress, then change later. I am leaving the FH up to him.

 

6. We're doing notecard invites (vistaprint so I can design them, but don't have to print and cut them, I am doing what they call "notecard"). Then I'll stick them inenvelopes, but no RSVP needed.

 

7. no photographer, we have a lot of cameras in the families.

 

8. we're doing a cake top and a cupcake tower

 

9. Decorations. We're doing chalkboard labels for everything, included in a sign for the dance floor "'trust me you can dance' -Vodka"

 

10. we're doing a banquet hall, so its just white (my FH won that battle because its 1400$ cheaper than where I wanted). So we're lining the walls with pictures in chronological order, him on one side me on the other, leading up to the tv that will play our wedding day and pics.

[Jamaica2016]

I love this thread! It is helping me get some ideas for things I've been struggling with for our AHR!

 

1. As cheap as possible, hopefully under $2000

2. Semi-formal

3. Just under a month after we return

4. Undecided. Maybe a little Jamaican twist somewhere in there since we're getting married in Jamaica?

5. I'll wear my wedding dress at least for the first part. Then, maybe change in to something easier to dance in?

6. NO IDEA?!

7. I'm hoping a friend who is starting out in her photography business can give us a deal. I'd like to capture some of the celebration.

8. Undecided. I'm considering making my own since I love to bake and it would be cheaper.

9. Also undecided. Strands of lights. Im thinking eclectic and mismatched to go along with our bohemian beach wedding.

10. I think we will play our wedding video and maybe do a slideshow of pictures from our trip. 

[rachelia160]

I'm having my AHR the weekend after we get back from Cancun (ambitious, I know!) on a Sunday afternoon because it was WAY cheaper than Fridays or Saturdays, probably from 1-4.  I'm going to be wearing my dress again after reading awesome posts on here about how so many other brides are doing it, cause HECK YEAH I want to wear it again!

 

Is it weird to have a DJ/Dancing during daylight hours?  When I originally booked it it was going to be really casual, thus the afternoon timeframe, but now that I know I want to wear my dress again, I think I might make it a little more formal.  Should I push back the timeframe into the evening, or is that inconvenient on a Sunday?

[jeffandrobyn]

Here are my answers: 

 

1. We want to keep it to $3,000-$3,500 tops. We included this in our wedding budget. 

2. It will informal. It's a Saturday brunch that is 4 hours. We will not be doing a dance. 

3. Our AHR is about 6 weeks after our wedding. 

4. Passed hors d'ouvres and a buffet 

5. I bought a white dress. It's not a wedding dress of any kind though. My FI will probably wear the tie he wears at our wedding. 

6. We made invitations on Vistaprint. They're nice but nothing fancy.

7. We hired a photographer, but he's a guy I work with and is really cheap.

8. A cake is part of the package we bought, but it's not a wedding cake. It's a sheet cake. 

9. Our venue has a very victorian, rustic look to it so we've matched that. We will have mason jars with flowers on each table along with a burlap table runner that has lace on it. 

10. We will display photos. The venue has a flat screen so we can rotate them, but there won't be any sort of formal presentation. We'll also buy some picture frames and put pictures along the bar. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[AbigelLuis]

Its really nice idea of not posting on Facebook. Even I don't like sharing all my special moments on Facebook.

[ValentineMrs2Be]

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?  We had to postpone our stateside wedding.  Everything was literally paid for.  The budget for that is twice the budget or the DW.

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?  It is formal.  When we postponed many of our guests suggested that we get married in a small ceremony and then recreate it.  The DW is only for the immediate family.  Everyone else is expecting to be invited to the "wedding" once we reschedule.  the AHR is a 5 hour event taking place on a Saturday evening.  We will have a ceremony where we say our vows, cocktail hour, and reception.   We originally asked for no gifts rather contributions to the charities that we feel strongly about.  

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?  The AHR is approximately 6 weeks after the DW.

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?  Sit down dinner.

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?  For the wedding I had to postpone I had a ceremony and reception dress.  I had planned to wear both.  Now with the DW I am going to wear my reception dress and the ceremony dress will be worn for he entire AHR event.

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We are thinking about having it in the small town where I grew up and many people just put an announcement in the local paper for people to attend but then it is difficult to determine the amount of food you need.  Formal invitations.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day? Yes

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?  Yes

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR?  We are having all the decor you would find for a ceremony and reception.

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how?  It is something we are considering if they are ready by the AHR event date.  I just don't know where we'd display them.  Maybe with the guest book or as part of the escort card table. 

[nadiakat17]

1. roughly 1000$. My parents paid for food and alcohol ( his parents brought some too) since it was at our lakehouse it was free but parking tight so we gave 200$ to a family friend to literally shuttle people all night. We paid like 300$ for decorations , plates etc

 

2. Very informal. It was from late afternoon to like 11 pm. No traditional wedding stuff like dances etc . We had a nautical theme it was cute. An inflatable lighthouse cooler, hanging red white and blue decorations, anchor straws, buoy, life preserver and ship wheel decorations, table clothes plates napkins nautical theme ( I tied the napkins in brown paper I stamped w nautical themes) pic I painted of our wedding coordinates, anchor table runner, sign that said "we tied the knot" etc. we also had a serve your own margarita station

 

3. We did ours a couple weeks ago like roughly 6 mo after wedding ( due to my schedule, weather )

 

4. We catered it from local company with burgers hot dogs side dishes and made a lot of apps. DH brewed an amazing beer and we made labels for it "hoppily ever after " huge hit

 

5. Way too casual for wedding dress so I wore a fringy flowy cream dress

 

6. we did paper invites from etsy. Super cute lakehouse theme. No presents

 

7. My professional photog brother who did amazing job w my wedding photos was unofficially supposed to shoot but I think was too busy relaxing so I mostly took some shots with my phone. Wished I would have talked to him more about it

 

8. our wedding cake was a rea let down so I wanted a re do. I spent a lot of time and money finding lakehouse miniatures to decorate a plain white sheet cake but the bakery kind of took over decorating it so I just added to it . I was bummed at first ( and wanted a 3 tier initially ) but it turned out cute. We had little Adirondack chairs w mini margarita , wine and cheese plate, Pail, sandcastle , flip flops, box of Pliny the elder beer ( DH big beer aficionado) and Mini books on the chairs of our interest ( engineering and mini grays anatomy ) the cake was blue like the lake with a big sandy graham cracker heart in the center with the scenery

 

9. Decorations. see above

 

10. Ugh I procrastinated then stayed up late multiple nights creating two beautiful lay flat $$ books on snapfish to have and paid for two day shipping. However they didn't say I needed to budget time for printing so they didn't make it! My mom had some printed photos she put in old fashioned album so people looked at that. That was the biggest bummer of the night

 

And his grandparents and sisters fam got sick and couldn't come but overall we had like 40 people and everyone had great time. Not too stressful glad I did it.

[acw271011]

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?  We ended up spending more on our AHR really than our wedding since our wedding was just the two of us, but with everything I think we were close to $5000

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?  Ours was sem-formal I think. We started with family photos ast 4 pm and went right unitl 1 am. We had a cake cutting, dinner and a dance afterwards with a DJ.
 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?  We had ours 2 weeks after coming home from Jamaica.
 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?  We had a sit-down dinner, family style.
 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?  I wore my dress again and hubby wore a tux since it was November and cool out. I had to get a shawl to wear with my dress since it was strapless and the weather got quite chilly.
 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We sent out flat card type invites ordered from Vistaprint.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day? Yes

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?  Yes

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR?  Not a whole lot. I have a friend with a business and she brought some twinkle lights that she put up and another friend made the table centerpieces.
 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how? The room we rented had a tv screen and we set up a slide show that ran all evening of photos from our wedding in Jamaica.