At Home Reception (AHR) Do's and Don'ts

brittmcfarlin · January 31, 2012

We are having ours 2 weeks after DW. We(including entire wedding party) will wear our wedding day attire into the reception. We will do the first dance, mother/son dance, etc just like a normal wedding reception. We are having a civil ceremony in Mexico. Since we have so many family that can't make the DW, my cousin is going to marry us at our AHR, but shhhh..... It's a surprise! We are having a band. For food it is going to be very informal, buffet style. My dad is bbqing. We will have a traditional wedding cake and since it's going to be in Texas in July we're having an ice cream bar in lieu of Groom's cake.

Krs398 · May 7, 2012

what should be included in the AHR slideshow?? Should i just do pictures from the DW and maybe some video clips? I just feel bad showing us all having fun when either the guests couldn't make it or weren't invited. should i include pics of us together prior to the DW?

katman · May 9, 2012

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of the tuxedo shirt for the FI haha...I think that would be right up my FI and his groomsmens alley! Thanks for sharing that!!

We are thinking of starting the night off in our formal attire (just so those who can't be at our DW can have a bit of a first hand experience) but making the switch just before or after dinner.
Has anyone else done the switch? How did it go?

Originally Posted by mmcst38

I don't know how I missed this thread, and actually was kind of shocked when reading it to see how many couples are basically having a formal reception. But, that is probably because my FI and I picked a destination wedding in part to avoid all that formality, since I have been in 7 weddings and he has been in quite a few as well, neither of us could conceive of having the traditional reception. Guess it just proves to each their own, not only with DW but the AHR as well!

So our "Encore Celebration" which is what we are calling it because it is by no means a reception, will be held at a local park that has pavillions for rent,

-we rented a 500 person pavillion has full kitchen in it, and enough room for people to be underneath in case of rain,

-we will have plenty of food, full bar, along with barrels of beer, also I will have the Jamaican rum punch made,

-will have cupcakes instead of cake, made by my favorite bakery

-we are having a DeeJay and, it will be for dancing and fun music, no dinner music here!

-there is a huge playground on the pavillion site we rented along with a baseball field horseshoe pits,

-we will setup some pics of our trip, along with some other things from the trip just so everyone can see

-I will not be wearing my dress obviously as this is informal, was loking to get a white sundress or maybe somethign tropical, my FI wants to wear a tuxedo tshirt..he thinks its funny, lol, I don't mind at all and if he does we will get matching kids ones for my two nephews

-we will decorate cover tables, flowers lanterns things like that, can't decide if I want to do our wedding colors for decoration or jamaican flag colors

- we will be sending out invites (got at michaels) 6 weeks prior and asking for rsvp since we will still need to know whether 50 or 150 people are comign to plan for food...

-our budget is not really set but minimal, my mom paid $400 for pavillion (it was $800 but we got half off for being residents!) she also paid for deejay which was $1000 but we got for $600 since we know him casually...

wel thats all I have so far, we wanted a party to celebrate our marriage with those who couldnt attend our wedding, nothing stressful, just fun

katman · May 9, 2012

I think I'm with you ladies....KayCee2117 & Brenners....
We are planning something casual and fun....more of a PARTY than a formal reception, but still a way for family/friends who are unable to make it to the DW to share our special event.

1. Budget.... Not to be included in our overall wedding budget, and hoping to keep costs relatively low (as in ideally under 2000$ but we shall see...)

2. Type.....Informal, backyard party!! My FI's parents live on a farm with lots of property. Thinking of getting a large event tent, and enjoying a BBQ style gathering with dancing (no DJ, just an
ipod) LOTS of drinks (open bar), home-made decorations and good times all around. A few speeches, and sharing of stories from the DW

3. When....This is up in the air for us as we haven't even solidified a DW date - but ideally thinking 2-4 weeks post wedding.

4. Food.....Again with the small-town/far setting (and knowing the type of people I'm marrying into haha) we are thinking of going with a Pig roast/BBQ that we provide (and pay for) and have a
                 of our family friends do the grillin'....then do salads, dips, hors d'eouvres, etc. For those things, we are tossing up with having family & close friends each bring a dish or using
                 a catering company.... leaning towards the "pot-luck" style, just for cost sake. Do you think this is horribly tacky? I feel like our family wouldn't mind but not sure about the idea
                 No "formal" seating either...just tables and chairs around so ppl can mingle

5. Clothes..... Hoping to wear our formal DW attire to start...for a grand entrance - just to let ppl who didn't get to come to the DW feel like they were really apart of it. After speeches,
change into party clothes!

6. Invitations..... Unsure...nothing fancy, something DIY with an RSVP section for numbers sake

7. Photographer..... Nah. We are thinking about using half of our engagement shoot towards this day as our photographer is willing to divide the package, otherwise we are just going to put out
disposable cameras, have ppl write their names on them, take pics throughout the night and leave them with us. After the party, we will develop them all and keep
a set for ourselves and send a set to the person whose camera they came from

8. Cake.......Homemade cupcakes all the way

9. Decorations..... Undecided. Probably to mimic the theme of our wedding...or just simply "Mexican FIESTA"

10. DW Photos.......Defs on display!! Slide show to be presented after entrance of bride/groom, and frames around the event tent to show off a bit

Originally Posted by KayCee2117

Our AHR will be quite informal. We are having it at my future in-law's backyard, BBQ style and a catered early evening meal. It won't be sit down served style, just a bunch of tables and chairs so people can chat and hang out. Budget is around $5K. I won't be wearing my wedding dress again (too fancy!), but probably a cute white summer dress, FI will probably wear something comfy but not too casual. Our friends will take photos with SRL cameras. No DJ either. We want to show a slide show of the wedding so need to figure out how to do that outdoors. Our DW is in Feb 2012 and we are planning the AHR for July 2012 so the weather is nicer. Decorations will probably be balloons, table runners, and plate/napkins of our wedding colour. We will also hand out wedding favours as we will have leftovers from the DW. Happy planning everyone

Originally Posted by Brenners

KayCee, this sounds more in line with what we will be planning.

balibride · June 1, 2012

Katman that sounds exactly like wha I want! I think I might go one step further and (instead of gifts) ask the guests to bring a desert each and have a big pudding bar following our hog roast, but not sure if it's a bit tacky to ask them to do that?

Katie McLean · June 7, 2012

1. Budget. We are trying to keep things under $2,000.00 we are lucky to have my parents forking this bill for us, but we'd still like to keep costs to a minimum.

2. Type. What kind of AHR are you planning? Is it formal or informal? How long will it last? Will you also have a dance after the reception? We are planning on having a semi-formal AHR, with mostly a large spread of appetizers and a small BBQ style buffet. Luckily my mom used to own a restaurant that does receptions so we are getting the space for free and a good deal on the food. We are having it from 1:00-4:00 and any stragglers will come celebrate more at my parents house.

3. When. How long after your DW are you planning the AHR? We are getting married on April 12, 2013 and are having the reception July 20th. In Vermont you can't count on the weather being remotely good until August.

4. Food. Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner? We are doing a BBQ style buffet.

5. Clothes. What are you wearing to your AHR? Your wedding day attire or something else entirely? We are going to wear our DW attire so that people like my grandparents, FI parents etc can see us in our wedding day attire.

6. Invitations. Formal or informal invitations? Something relatively inexpensive with a RSVP for food purposes.

7. Photographer. Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day? We are having a family friend (who is a photographer) go to Jamaica with us and in the deal he agreed to do the AHR for a couple of hours as well.

8. Cake. Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR? We are doing a chocolate fountain instead

9. Decorations. What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? Probably a mock Jamaica theme....star fish, shells etc

10. DW Photos. Are you going to have these on display and if so, how? We are! We are going to print a bunch, and clothes pin them to a "clothes line" which will really just be twine.

Katie McLean · June 7, 2012