At Home Reception (AHR) Do's and Don'ts

[jennaba3]

Im having a pretty formal AHR as its important for us to include our grandparents etc who couldnt make the DW.

 

Having a sit down meal in the day for everyone that came to the DW and family who couldnt make it. Then will have an evening reception for everyone else along with a buffet.

 

I will de displaying the photos from Mexico and a screen.

 

We will all be in full wedding attire also xxxxxx

[Peach]

The plan so far for us is to try and find a happy balance between formal and casual AHR. Originally we just were thinking casual, but we got some flack from family who will not be attending the DW; and we also want to ease it on my grandparents as much as possible, so we are adding some traditional elements. It will be a buffet style, and we will be wearing our wedding clothes (but they are going to be pretty casual anyway). We are doing a slideshow of us as children up to engagement pictures, with music, then playing the wedding video right after that, and then leaving wedding pictures rotating all night. There will be dancing, but I am just hooking up an iPod. I will be making decorations and centrepieces (already started!). We are hoping to keep it around $5000. Basically, the DW is for us, the AHR is the compromise for my family. That's the way we are looking at it, anyway.

[zbwedding]

I havent even thought much at all about an AHR... everything right now is budget, budget, budget.  But I really appreciate threads like this... gets me thinking of the possibilities.

[MsBlissMpls]

We are planning an AHR 3 weeks after we return from Mexico. Our location is a private events room at a newer Mexican restaurant to the area. It has an old world Mexican feel to the room with lots of window and a beautiful chandelier. We chose this place because of the cool atmosphere, easy ample heated parking next to the restaurant and the minimum food & beverage is $2,500 (which includes the free room reservation, 3-4 servers for our event & no extra fees) compared to $6,000 + fees at all the other places we looked at. We are hoping to keep the cost at $5,000 - so far we are on track!

 

The plan is for eveyone to arrive at 6:30pm (adults-only). Everyone will be welcomed at the door with a drink from the 3-4 servers that will be providing tapas & drinks butler style. We are hosting wine, beer, sangaria's and margaritas (with a cap at $1,500-$1,800 or so, then turning to cash bar) At 7:00 we will have a celebratory toast and do a slideshow of wedding photos for about 5 minutes.

 

After the slideshow on a huge projector screen the projector screen will go up and we will have hundreds of wedding photos playing on a flat screen TV to on the side wall for the rest of the evening. Also after the Celebratory toast we will have a taco bar open to everyone as well as additional passed tapas & drinks.

 

We found center pieces at TJMaxx/Homegoods and are having a friend's company do red up-lighting and a gobo with our names and wedding date. Those were our two splurges. We plan to have tres leches cake from a local bakery. To keep the cost down we are buying a bunch of regular sized cakes and then having the pieces butler passed around 8:00 that evening (rather than buying a special wedding cake which can get expensive). One round cake with our cake topper from the Mexico celebration and an elaborate cake stand will be displayed at a table with flowers & candles and a little sign that says "Cake will be enjoyed at 8:00" - or something like that so people will know that dessert is coming later in the evening   I plan to have a little table with "to-go" cake available after the inital serving of the cake, if there are left overs.

 

I'm also thinking of having little programs welcoming everyone that tells an approximate timeline of events for the evening - just so people know what to expect. In general people are kind of used to a full sit-down reception with chicken and mashed potatoes, so I don't want people to think they will not be fed when they walk into our cocktail-style reception with no place settings.

 

Everything is pretty much figured out. Now all we have to do is wait for the RSVP's to come in so we know how to set up the tables.

 

Oh, we sent save the date magnets 4 months before the reception. The magnets came in a holder that announces that we will be married in Mexico and are excited to celebrate with them at our Mexican Fiesta, it also has our wedding website and asks people to visit the website to RSVP. The holder also said that we will send an RSVP email reminder 1 month before the reception. We do not plan to send out additional invitations - we would if it was more formal, but it's a Cocktail Fiesta, so I'm okay with just an email reminder to RSVP. - plus we only invited our close family and friends, so they do not mind the "informal" RSVP reminder and they all LOVE the magnet. - actully lots of people have already RSVP's "Yes".  

 

We are SO excited to throw a party celebrating our wedding! Sometimes I forget that we GET to go to Mexico & get married before the AHR!

 

Hope that helps anyone who is thinking of a cocktail style Mexican Fiesta.

 

 

 

 

[Brenners]

Our AHR will be May 5th - almost three months after our wedding.  We are holding it in my hometown.  Nothing fancy.  I don't want a dance but this is my mother's show (it has turned into what she wants rather than what we want) so I have no idea how that will turn out.

[Peach]

Hmmm... that could be interesting. I am kind of in the same boat. How are you dealing with that?

 

Originally Posted by Brenners 

Our AHR will be May 5th - almost three months after our wedding.  We are holding it in my hometown.  Nothing fancy.  I don't want a dance but this is my mother's show (it has turned into what she wants rather than what we want) so I have no idea how that will turn out.

 

[Brenners]

A little update.  Talked to my mom today and she was in a more reasonable mood.  Three hour reception from 2:00-5:00 and no dance.  Buffet kind of food - no formal dinner and no seating arrangements so not quite the big to-do that she originally was pushing for.  I am taking advantage before she changes her mind!
 

Originally Posted by Peach 

Hmmm... that could be interesting. I am kind of in the same boat. How are you dealing with that?

 

 

 

[nancya]

Our AHR is going to be a chinese banquet. Our DW is sort of a secret haha because we both have very opinionated extended families so the DW is a need to know basis. So it will be formal we will both be in our full wedding gear and our guest list is at about 200 right now!! I am really hoping to keep it around 150 so we'll see. We are having a band at the reception with dancing and a formal cake and we will have our first dance again. We will also have a table with photos of the DW so it will be like.....your invited to our wedding....surprise!! we already got married hahaha. Our seperate budget is probably around 9k.

[lolo411]

 

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception? I plan for it so be semi-formal and last anywhere from 3-5 hours. We will be having it at in the backyard of FI's dad's house. 

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?  No more than a month later. 

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner? Buffet (thinking luau)

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely? I plan on wearing my dress for a bit and then changing into a party dress. 

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  I plan on buying some from Michael's to send. 

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day? Not sure yet. We have a friend who is trying to get into the business so we may hire him. 

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR? No. I want to have a dessert table. 

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? Simple. Lanterns and white lights. 

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how? Didn't think about this before, but this is a great idea. Maybe we'll put them on the dessert table. 

[lolo411]

Oops. I forgot to answer the first question. I am not sure. We'll have to get chair and table rentals, food, and alcohol. We don't plan on having a DJ or anything like that. We'll just play music from the ipod. It won't be very big so I am thinking we can keep it under $1k.