How Do I Tell my Sister to Step Back?

[Mrs. Williams]

Ok, I'll start from the beginning with this.  I have been dating my FI for 6 years now.  I've been looking forward to the wedding day for the last 5 and EVERYONE knows this.  We got engaged last November and planned our wedding for May 28, 2011.  My sister got engaged (when he put the ring on) on July 4th this year.  They have been dating for 9 months and have been talking about getting married for the last 5 months.  I picked my date before they started this talk about getting married.  Mind you, I am the oldest (25) and she is 21.  So, here is where the problem begins ...

 

My sister asked orginally if she could get married first and I flat out said no.  I've been waiting on this day for so long and how dare you try to get married first when I was engaged first.  So, then she decides to have the wedding 2 months after min, which means that our parents are paying for 2 weddings in one year.  I picked purple, gray and cream for my colors and she later picked purple and silver for hers.  I picked my bridesmaids dresses and she asked could hers wear the same since we are going to have 2 of the same bridesmaids.  She asked whether my daughter, both of our flower girl, wear the dress she's wearing to my wedding to hers.  She asked whether she can borrow the jewelry I plan to get to her wedding, and we're sharing table linen.  I have said yes to everything except the bridesmaids dresses because my wedding is first and everyone will know she's borrowing my stuff.

 

Today, she asks AGAIN, whether they can get married first and use my wedding as their honeymoon!  I wanted to have a conniption.  I just simply said, I would prefer that you wait but do whatever you want.  I'M FUMING.  I can't believe she had the audacity to go back to that.

 

How do I handle this?

[mimi73]

Oh my GOD! I don't even know what to say! I am having a hard time understanding how sometimes people can ask for so much and think it is ok. I feel so bad for you, you obviously love her and don't want to cause any hurt feelings.

All I can say is that I completely think that you are justified in all that you are feeling. I would be feeling exactly the same way that you are. WHY are her colours so similar too?!! I'm surprised that she just didn't ask to have the wedding at the same time!

[Mrs. Williams]

That was my mother's idea.  She said that we were being selfish.  I told her no, my sister is being selfish because I picked my wedding day WAY before this guy was ever in the picture and now she's jumped on the wedding train.

 

She used the excuse that both of our favorite color is purple.  I explained that she could have chosen many other colors to compliment purple instead of silver.  I mean really, why is she trying so hard to make this whole thing be about her?  She has faked this "I want to be respectful of you" attitude but I see right through that.

 

ARGGGHHHHHHHHHHH