What we have here is failure to communicate

townie princess · July 14, 2008

Planning a wedding from a distance without the help of a wedding planner is difficult.

Especially when there is little unbiased help from the family and friends who live in the wedding location.

My FMIL is heading to NF this week until the end of the month and has offered to do some wedding tasks for us while she's there. Which I really appreciate, but it's more like meddling help than listening to what we want and doing that.

For example, we were talking about wedding cakes on the weekend and how much the caterer is going to charge to cut it ($50). I had just planned to get a few fav cakes from Costco and serve them. Our caterer also refuses to serve "our" dessert as part of the meal (they don't want credit for something that's not theirs, understandably).

So FI and I said we'd probably get a small cake and serve that, because who would want cake after eating and drinking half of the night! My FMIL has been nudging us to use a "buddy" of her's from Facebook (of all places!) to do the wedding decorating. FMIL says "oh, this lady does cakes too. She can bake one for ya and get you the cake forms and all that stuff"

I kept saying "no that's ok, we're not going to use her, she's so far away from the wedding location" (150km at least). But she STILL keeps talking about this lady.

My feet may be small, but they're made of lead, so when my foot comes down, there better not be any arguements about our decisions.

FI stepped in to keep the peace by saying "yes mom, ask her about it and we'll think about it".

I hope to gad that FMIL doesn't book her as a "surprise" for us. I'll freak! If you don't have a website and you just randomly met on Facebook, why should I trust you with one of the most important days in my life!

FMIL also dropped the bomb on the weekend that we should invite her partner's mother. Whom we have never met. And she probably won't show up. And I don't think FI considers his mom's partner as related to him at all.

I dread to think of how many people she's going to invite to this wedding while she's back in NF... I think FI needs to have a little chat with her before she leaves.

And on top of all these family matters, I'm having a hard time getting the contract from our venue. I called there about 2 weeks ago and tentatively booked it. I called there last Friday to give them my mailing address so they could send me the contract. I got ahold of the catering manager and she said she emailed me the contract while we were on the phone. I gave her my email address twice!

She also told me if I had any questions to send her an email so that I don't have to rack up long distance charges on the phone. Nice.

So it's now Monday and I still haven't received it. I checked my spam just in case, but nothing. And she took her time answering my earlier questions too.

I don't like the sound of this. But this is the venue we can afford and is most accessible, so I guess I'll just add it to my list of wedding woes.