A mentally tough week

lucy106 · April 11, 2008

Wow, this week has been tough for me mentally. I dont know what I would've done without RJ. Monday I had my 6 week back doctor check up. He basically told me we will talk at my next 6 week appointment about if I can go back to work. He told me it is up to me if I go back but I need to realize that I am at a greater risk for more damage to my spine. So now I need to decide if that is worth if or if I should disability out of work. Touch decisions.

Then I went to the gynecologist on Tuesday and she told me that if we ever decided we wanted to become pregnant that #1, it would be very difficult so she would immediately send us to a specialist and #2 the clots I had will more then likely come back. So again more decisions to make!

I feel like a medical disaster at the age of 30. I have been crying for days and feeling not worthy of being loved by anyone. But thanks to the wonderful man who is my fiance I am slowly getting my head out of my ass. I thank the Gods above for him daily!!!!

I know everything happens for a reason I just need to figure out what that reason is!