RSVP's .... non-responders

[ktchi]

I know a lot of people are saying- don't bother to call the people who did not respond, but in my situation- I've had at least two people not RSVP and wind up booking and coming to the wedding. It is a good thing that we followed up with them or else they would have been surprises with no where to sit and no food to eat at the wedding. I would definately follow up with people who do not RSVP (from personal experience).

 

I also had a lot of people say they were coming, but when it came down to the wire they couldn't come- so having an RSVP date that still gave me time to plan and buy things, and following up with RSVPs really helped us.

[Sheree10]

I know ladies it's definately a pain. I got a few more responses way after the date but there are still about 30 ppl who we haven't heard from. The only person I planned to contact was a girlfriend who in the beginning said yes she will be there and wouldn't miss it for the world. Well she's probably not coming but I never heard from her until I called. I was actually going to ask her to be a BM when we first got engaged. I guess Im glad I didn't because that would be more $ for her.

[Sheree10]

Quote:

Originally Posted by meldal101010 Ughhhh.....I really can't believe so many couples have to go through this. When we were planning we sent out 100 invites & 55 people came back saying they were coming, just by word of mouth, email etc...well our RSVPs are supposed to be returned by June 1st & we've only recieved 5 back...5 out of 100 invites...ridiculous. The worst is that I really wanted to get some things bought so we went ahead & ordered 60 of everything because these 55 people were for sures...now people are backing out & we have a for sure guest list of 28 people....I even went ahead & ordered 60 mugs from discount mugs---not cheap & now we have double what we'll need. I can't even sell them because we had them personalized:s SUPER frustrating...but in a way my fault for taking peoples words & not waiting until they were booked...

I'm so sorry to hear about that!!Isn't this so annoying? I'm two months away and still afraid to buy anything yet. Maybe I will wait until the beginning of June. We have 57 confirmed but that doesn't mean everyone will come! I'm sure I will get someone who rsvp'ed but didn't buy ticket/reserve room and will back out at the last minute.

Are you having an AHR? maybe you can give out extra personalized items then?

I was planning on getting my oot bags made from discount mugs. They have such a great variety.

[katelynn]

I am soooo glad I found this as I am also going through the same thing. We still have 3 weeks until our deadline but I am in the same boat with getting stuff for OOT bags etc...I now know how fustrating it can be!

[cross]

I feel everyone's pain. I don't understand why people have no courtesy. It does not upset me that someone can't go - so just send back the RSVP already. I need to get an accurate count so that we do not over-spend for food, chairs, OOT bags, etc.

 

The ones I really like are the family members who tell us that they are going to book in September for an October wedding. We have several (10) guests like this. So frustrating, but that is just the way it goes. Those people who really want to be there will, and it will not matter in 6 months.

 

On a side note - I know someone who had 36 RSVPs and 70 people showed up to her DW. OMG!

[Sheree10]

Quote:

Originally Posted by cross I feel everyone's pain. I don't understand why people have no courtesy. It does not upset me that someone can't go - so just send back the RSVP already. I need to get an accurate count so that we do not over-spend for food, chairs, OOT bags, etc. The ones I really like are the family members who tell us that they are going to book in September for an October wedding. We have several (10) guests like this. So frustrating, but that is just the way it goes. Those people who really want to be there will, and it will not matter in 6 months. On a side note - I know someone who had 36 RSVPs and 70 people showed up to her DW. OMG!

It is crazy not to reply at all, especially to a DW!! I can't believe that so many people didn't respond but showed up anyway. I would be pissed. I think I may have the opposite happen- a few who said they are coming may drop at the last minute. I hope they at least let us know.

I hope your family doesn't get upset because a month before traveling the rates will be the highest. Good luck getting them to book a little earlier.

[CanadianLindsey]

This is exactly why we did not give out info on our resort(besides cost) until after people RSVP'd. That way they had to book thru our TA(yay group rate!) and we can keep all rooms in the same area of the resort and know exactly how many guests are coming for food, favors, etc. We also didn't allow random "dates" so this was really the only way to match up singles into double occp. rooms(for cost savings).

[AndreaD]

I could have written the original post. My deadline is in two days and I have not received any RSVPs in the past 10 days. What happened to courtesy? This is not a backyard barbecue at my house!

 

However, from experience, I know how difficult it is to say "I can't go" to a DW of someone close to you. This happened to me a few years ago when I was a broke grad student and received an invitation to a friend's DW.

 

My strategy is to follow up only with friends/family who said that they would make it and to assume that the rest are not going. I think that if I were planning on attending a DW, I would call or e-mail the bride to let her know that I am looking forward to the wedding.

 

I have a few extra favors on hand and to count on the RSVPs I did receive. The resort should be able to accomodate a few extra guests. If a guest doesn't get an out of town bag or favor, who cares. You can mail one to them later.

[hat0112]

This is so frustrating, but ours isn't as bad as some of you on here. We invited 88 people and never heard from 36 and today was the deadline. It just doesn't make sense. They get a stamped, addressed envelope and a card that they only have to check off yes or no and they can't even do that? I don't care if it is no, just tell me.

 

I don’t plan on following up with anyone. I am going to assume they are no.

 

And now I have to worry about the people who said they were going but haven’t booked. In my eyes, you aren’t coming till you’re booked. It is too easy to come up with an excuse on why you can’t go if you haven’t booked yet.

[mnh1983]

I sent out my invitations a few days ago, so we shall soon see how many people will RSVP. I made my response date about two weeks before I really need to know so that I can hopefully catch stragglers. I have to give a head count to the coordinator for our dinner, so I figure I will take the number I get and add a few, just in case. I don't see what is so hard about writing your name on a card and sending back in an envelope that already has postage on it!

 

My cousin got married last fall, and our aunt never RSVP'd for the wedding. She didn't even call. The wedding was in October, and now at the end of June, my cousin still never heard anything from my aunt about not coming or calling. It isn't like my aunt didn't know either. My cousin and uncle aren't mad that she didn't come but mad because of the fact that she didn't have the decency to fill out the card. It definitely has caused a rift on that side of the family. Just be courteous folks!!!