If This is Your Second Marriage....

Martha · July 25, 2007

We are getting legally married in the US before we head off to Mexico. I do not plan to change my name back beforehand.

This is why I never changed it back:

It's Spanish and much more convenient down here. Also, my maiden name is hard to pronounce and being a teacher, I wanted to make it easy on my students. I am hyphenated on my college diploma and am still hyphenated in grad school...I never wanted to "lose" my maiden name, ya know? So...all my colleagues and newer friends know me by my married name only.

Jesus Lord, why is this so complicated?

lavalos · July 25, 2007

As much as I do not get along with my ex, I decided to keep my married name for many reasons. I've been divorced for over 10 years, now, so it would be kind of weird if I changed back to my maiden name right before my new marriage. The majority of invitees know me by my x's married name even though they knew me before I was married.

If the divorce is new and the majority of people invited to the wedding still use your maiden name, than I'd say use your maiden. If you've been using your married name for a long period of time and a majority of the invitees know you by that name, I'd say don't put the maiden on the invite. I'm sure there will be plenty of other keepsakes and memories that will have your new name blasted all over it.

Martha · July 25, 2007

Thank you for your help, ladies! I still have some time to think about it. Maybe I will get 1/2 the invitations printed one way and the other 1/2 printed a different way. ha!

dragonfly · July 25, 2007

I say don't use your last names at all, and if you must then use your married name if that is how people know you. I have my ex husbands last name, it is who I am, and have been for 19 years.

I didn't put our last names on the invite, because it is a dw everyone invited knows Everton and I well, so there was no need for last names. I also didn't put my parents on the invite, Everton and my parents are guests to our wedding they are not hosting it. I believe you would only put their names on it if they were hosting the wedding.

I did put my children's names on the invite. I put their names inviting everyone to join them in the caribbean for the marriage, of their parent's, Kelly and Everton. Hope this helps.

Kelly~