Guest assumes they can bring someone

[hiccups]

We are having a few single friends coming and we're expecting that they will bring a guest which is fine for us as long as they're not coming with a whole entourage! The FI convinced me that it's their vacation too and they should be able to bring along a friend. I totally get though that you'd much rather extend the invite to the few people that you had to cut off your list due to budget, etc and then the single friends bring guests that you don't even know!!

[LChavez]

I don't agree with guests assuming they can bring a guest. You wouldnt do that at home. They can bring a guest to the destination just not to the wedding if they're not given a plus 1.

[*kellis*]

I had a friend that rsvp'd with a plus one. I called her to see if she was dating someone I wasn't aware of, in that case I probably would have been fine with her bringing him. But she said that she was talking about the wedding with a friend(that I've met ONCE) and the other girl was excited about it so she was going to bring her along. It was hard to do but I explained to her that we had a small guestlist and such. I thought she was fine with coming by herself and had her sat with lots of people she knew for the reception. But she didn't even show up for the wedding. It was kind of disappointing and not sure if she's offended or just have "better" stuff to do.

 

A wedding definitely changes your perception of your friendships with some people.

[MrsJones2Be]

I never considered this and now I worry about my guest list getting crazy! I think if I know that my friends or family member is in a serious relationship then I will extend the invite to a plus one. But otherwise I will have to put my foot down. This is our day and we need to make sure we keep the costs manageable for our budget.

[eholt]

This question came up this morning and my thought is that if someone wants to travel all that way to be with us on our day, and we really want them there, then they may bring a guest. Some people do not wish to travel alone. I planned/budgeted accordingly and think it will be a good time had by all. Now if they want to bring 2-3 additional people...thats a no-no!

[alundy]

Even though these "single people" may not be in a long term committed relationship at the time, they may be dating someone, and since most ppl don't get that much vacation time and vacations are expensive, this may be the only vacation they can take all year. So I can understand if they want to spend it with this person they are dating even though you don't know them or necessarily want them at your wedding. I look at it as one of those things that comes along with having a DW.

 

I know if I was asked to come to a DW and not bring anyone, I probably wouldn't end up going.

 

I do agree that a good comprimise would be to have them bring a guest to the resort, but not bring them to the actual ceremony/reception since that's costing you quite a bit.

[QueenDiva]

Oh this is so pi$$ing me off! We have the whole resort, but that is still limited to 34 rooms/villas and there are couples that are inviting their friends. Well, actually their friends are inviting themselves after seeing the STD's! I have a contact form on our website where potential guests put their contact info, desired room type and whether they are staying 3 nights only or the entire 7 nights- then there's a space for comments. I just had someone send me a contact form that said in the comments section "Hi! We are friends of so and so". WHAT!! This is wrecking my nerves as we are paying for the 1st night for specific room types, the catamaran cruise, and the reception food! I have a FAQ's page on my website, but the answer addressing that question was a quarter of the way down the page so I just moved it to the top of the page. What is wrong with people??

[alundy]

I can't believe random "friends of friends" would invite themselves along... I mean it's one thing to bring a date but not a whole group of people.

 

I think I would contact these people individually (by email or whatever) and just say "I received your room request via the website, but unfortunately we have a limited number of rooms available for the wedding so I have to reserve them for the people we invited who haven't RSVP'd yet. If spots open up once everyone has RSVP'd, I will definitely let you know." or something like that. I don't know where people get these ideas....

[Cindy*]

For all our single invitees, we have purposely told them that they can bring a guest. I figure if they are coming all this way to our wedding, I can pay for an extra plate so that they are not by themselves. Besides, the single rate for travel is so much more expensive, I knew a lot of people were more likely to come if they could bring a friend. As it turns out, only one of our single friends is bringing someone. The rest are coming on their own as they know they will have plenty of friends there and have arranged room sharing with each other, etc. As far as friends of friends who we haven't invited. I wouldn't mind them coming and staying at the resort during our wedding week but I certainly wouldn't include them in the wedding festivities.

[dcjackie]

I'm getting married in November in a small town in Mexico. We're just doing travel arangements now, and admittedly this hasn't happened to us yet. I don't see the problem with guests inviting friends to stay at the resort, or in my case in the town at the same time. They wouldn't need to be invited to the actual wedding. I view it that these folks have travelled a long way to be with us, but we just get one day. Not the whole week. it is probably the only vacation people will get in a year. I'm just honoured that they're choosing to spend *part* of it celebrating with us.