Any Gran Bahia Principe Runaway Bay Brides out there?

[toesinsand30]

I will let you know when (or if) i do

 

Originally Posted by BusyBee123 

Hmmm...I can't figure out what the problem is then! My billing address is my home address, the same home address I am trying to have them shipped to!  And we tried this on my both, and my FI cards!  I tried emailing the company and they said there is nothing they can do to help me if the credit card doesn't go through and that they won't accept any other form of payment! Very frustrating! I guess I'll have to buy them from somewhere else!  Good luck with receiving yours!
 

 

 

[JayKay]

I'm sorry that your FMIL is being like this!  My FMIL is the same type of person, has to make everything about her and she says since she is contributing (barely anything!) she should have a say in things.  We too don't want speeches and have told her and she doesn't understand.  I guess maybe just sitting down and discussing why you feel the way you feel and maybe compromising on something not so big might make her feel better.  Good luck! Let us know how things go!
 

Originally Posted by katelynn 

Okay girls I need some advice from all of you about something...

 

My FMIL is being a total crazy lady right now and she is driving me to drink..seriously!

 

My FI and I decided months ago that we didnt want speeches at our wedding, and when we told her this she got all angry. She now has bugged us like 5 times about it, she doesnt take NO for an answer! She is the type of person to make everything about her, I cant even count the amount of times I have heard its her 40th wedding anniversary this year. Further, at her other sons wedding a couple of years ago she made their speeches all about them and my FI brother is still mad about it. She doesnt get the hint that we have told her NO sooo many times and keeps bringing it up, so what to do?!

 

FURTHER!!

 

My father and I do not get along, we never have and never will, therefore I dont want to do a father daughter dance. To make things worse we are not on speaking terms right now as we got in a fight the last time I was visiting. My FMIL is now demanding that she have a dance with my FI and is driving me crazy about it as she knows about my relationship with my dad, and therefore I think she should respect my wishes on the wedding day.....however not so much!

 

So, I really dont know what to do as she has said already she has helped pay and therefore she should have a say, but at the same time ITS OUR WEDDING! My FI has already spoken to her but I am thinking next week when we go back home to get ready we should sit down and talk with her about it??

 

any suggestions ladies to deal with FMILzilla?

 

[missy&eric2011]

Is your father going?
Could you just do a mother/son dance and skip the father/daughter dance, or would people ask intrusive questions???

My FI isn't very close to his mother, so he doesn't think he is going to do a dance with her, but I am for sure dancing with my dad...

 

But I agree, sitting down with her and being very firm about what you and you FI want for that day may be the ticket...
 

Originally Posted by katelynn 

Okay girls I need some advice from all of you about something...

 

My FMIL is being a total crazy lady right now and she is driving me to drink..seriously!

 

My FI and I decided months ago that we didnt want speeches at our wedding, and when we told her this she got all angry. She now has bugged us like 5 times about it, she doesnt take NO for an answer! She is the type of person to make everything about her, I cant even count the amount of times I have heard its her 40th wedding anniversary this year. Further, at her other sons wedding a couple of years ago she made their speeches all about them and my FI brother is still mad about it. She doesnt get the hint that we have told her NO sooo many times and keeps bringing it up, so what to do?!

 

FURTHER!!

 

My father and I do not get along, we never have and never will, therefore I dont want to do a father daughter dance. To make things worse we are not on speaking terms right now as we got in a fight the last time I was visiting. My FMIL is now demanding that she have a dance with my FI and is driving me crazy about it as she knows about my relationship with my dad, and therefore I think she should respect my wishes on the wedding day.....however not so much!

 

So, I really dont know what to do as she has said already she has helped pay and therefore she should have a say, but at the same time ITS OUR WEDDING! My FI has already spoken to her but I am thinking next week when we go back home to get ready we should sit down and talk with her about it??

 

any suggestions ladies to deal with FMILzilla?

 

[acw271011]

Ok. from the old lady that has been through this before many, many years ago and is silly enough to do it again when I'm this old...

 

you're going to be in charge once the reception gets going.  you'll be at the head table. if you can stick the parents at a separate table even if you have to use the excuse that the resort policy is that the tables are smaller so parents can't be at the same table with you.  unless someone starts a speech, or speeches, just don't do any.  don't open up an opportunity for any.  is she the type of person that doesn't mind looking stupid? would she stand up all by herself?  let everyone else know that you aren't doing speeches, ones you know who will respect your wishes.  if she stands up on her own, get someone to cut her off, either by changing the subject or set up a signal with someone you trust to start tapping their glass for you guys to kiss right in the middle of her talking. that will definitely shut her up.

 

as to the dancing, tell your FI to wait until you're dancing with someone else to go over and ask his mom to dance. there isn't any law that says it has to be in a specific order. so just do your own thing and when the opportunity presents itself, he can go ask her to dance.  make sure your dj knows that you aren't dancing with your dad. believe me - that's no big deal either.  if people are rude enough orignorant enough to make comments or ask questions tell them it's none of their business.  which is the absolute truth.

 

and finally ladies - don't worry about what everyone else thinks.  I know it's hard when you've had financial help in terms of planning the wedding. the people that pay think they have a say in it.  the comment to that is that's fine. when you get home you'll pay back the money. that generally shuts people up because it makes them feel guilty.  you emphasize that it's YOUR wedding and that there are certain things that you want and don't want. and if they can't agree with it, they can just stay home!!  it's your wedding.  enjoy it!!  and if you have to, be blunt and tell the offending person that if they aren't willing to cooperate, then you don't want them there.  when someone has paid that much money for a trip, they generally think twice if there is a chance they might lose the money because you tell them you don't want them there.

 

hope this helps. everyone is stressed at this stage because your wedding is so close.  if she's driving you to drink, then go ahead and have one and beat her to it!!!
 

Originally Posted by katelynn 

Okay girls I need some advice from all of you about something...

 

My FMIL is being a total crazy lady right now and she is driving me to drink..seriously!

 

My FI and I decided months ago that we didnt want speeches at our wedding, and when we told her this she got all angry. She now has bugged us like 5 times about it, she doesnt take NO for an answer! She is the type of person to make everything about her, I cant even count the amount of times I have heard its her 40th wedding anniversary this year. Further, at her other sons wedding a couple of years ago she made their speeches all about them and my FI brother is still mad about it. She doesnt get the hint that we have told her NO sooo many times and keeps bringing it up, so what to do?!

 

FURTHER!!

 

My father and I do not get along, we never have and never will, therefore I dont want to do a father daughter dance. To make things worse we are not on speaking terms right now as we got in a fight the last time I was visiting. My FMIL is now demanding that she have a dance with my FI and is driving me crazy about it as she knows about my relationship with my dad, and therefore I think she should respect my wishes on the wedding day.....however not so much!

 

So, I really dont know what to do as she has said already she has helped pay and therefore she should have a say, but at the same time ITS OUR WEDDING! My FI has already spoken to her but I am thinking next week when we go back home to get ready we should sit down and talk with her about it??

 

any suggestions ladies to deal with FMILzilla?

 

[lmarie]

Katelynn, Im sorry you are going through that! I think it will become an issue for myself as well. What you described sounds exactly like my situation too. I also dont want to do speeches or the traditional dances. My FI is always concerned with pleasing his parents, so I hope they just leave us alone and let us do it the way we want to do it. Our wedding and travel dates have been changed for his parents already. So I really hope there is no more interference.

 

But I'm quoting ACW's advice because it was great!! Thanks Acw for the  wonderful suggestions on how to deal with the situation. You have helped me out possibly too, in case I also run into this situation.

 

Originally Posted by acw271011 

Ok. from the old lady that has been through this before many, many years ago and is silly enough to do it again when I'm this old...

 

you're going to be in charge once the reception gets going.  you'll be at the head table. if you can stick the parents at a separate table even if you have to use the excuse that the resort policy is that the tables are smaller so parents can't be at the same table with you.  unless someone starts a speech, or speeches, just don't do any.  don't open up an opportunity for any.  is she the type of person that doesn't mind looking stupid? would she stand up all by herself?  let everyone else know that you aren't doing speeches, ones you know who will respect your wishes.  if she stands up on her own, get someone to cut her off, either by changing the subject or set up a signal with someone you trust to start tapping their glass for you guys to kiss right in the middle of her talking. that will definitely shut her up.

 

as to the dancing, tell your FI to wait until you're dancing with someone else to go over and ask his mom to dance. there isn't any law that says it has to be in a specific order. so just do your own thing and when the opportunity presents itself, he can go ask her to dance.  make sure your dj knows that you aren't dancing with your dad. believe me - that's no big deal either.  if people are rude enough orignorant enough to make comments or ask questions tell them it's none of their business.  which is the absolute truth.

 

and finally ladies - don't worry about what everyone else thinks.  I know it's hard when you've had financial help in terms of planning the wedding. the people that pay think they have a say in it.  the comment to that is that's fine. when you get home you'll pay back the money. that generally shuts people up because it makes them feel guilty.  you emphasize that it's YOUR wedding and that there are certain things that you want and don't want. and if they can't agree with it, they can just stay home!!  it's your wedding.  enjoy it!!  and if you have to, be blunt and tell the offending person that if they aren't willing to cooperate, then you don't want them there.  when someone has paid that much money for a trip, they generally think twice if there is a chance they might lose the money because you tell them you don't want them there.

 

hope this helps. everyone is stressed at this stage because your wedding is so close.  if she's driving you to drink, then go ahead and have one and beat her to it!!!
 

 

 

[BusyBee123]

I feel for you Katelynn! Family stuff is never easy, and just think we're all marrying into another one! What were we thinking!?!

 

I agree with the others, although they might be financially contributing, it is still your day.  Ultimately all decisions come down to you.  Its nice to give them a chance for input, but once a decision is made, your FMIL needs to accept it.  

 

This may sound silly, but what if you told her that you would really appreciate a letter or poem instead of a speech? Something that she could write to you and your FI that could be framed and given to you as a gift or something like that.  Then you could make some wonderful statement about having it forever, even though you wont be able to squeeze it into your big day?  It may make her feel special and get her off your back! Who knows!  

 

In terms of a dance, I would say hold firm on that one! You absolutely don't want to feel uncomfortable on your special day!  Maybe you could let her pick on song later in the evening that her and your FI could go and ask her to dance to it while everyone else is dancing.  Then it wouldn't be a formal mother/son dance, but she'd still get a song and dance!  

 

I'm all about trying to compromise, yet still get what you want!  Best of luck! 

 

Originally Posted by katelynn 

Okay girls I need some advice from all of you about something...

 

My FMIL is being a total crazy lady right now and she is driving me to drink..seriously!

 

My FI and I decided months ago that we didnt want speeches at our wedding, and when we told her this she got all angry. She now has bugged us like 5 times about it, she doesnt take NO for an answer! She is the type of person to make everything about her, I cant even count the amount of times I have heard its her 40th wedding anniversary this year. Further, at her other sons wedding a couple of years ago she made their speeches all about them and my FI brother is still mad about it. She doesnt get the hint that we have told her NO sooo many times and keeps bringing it up, so what to do?!

 

FURTHER!!

 

My father and I do not get along, we never have and never will, therefore I dont want to do a father daughter dance. To make things worse we are not on speaking terms right now as we got in a fight the last time I was visiting. My FMIL is now demanding that she have a dance with my FI and is driving me crazy about it as she knows about my relationship with my dad, and therefore I think she should respect my wishes on the wedding day.....however not so much!

 

So, I really dont know what to do as she has said already she has helped pay and therefore she should have a say, but at the same time ITS OUR WEDDING! My FI has already spoken to her but I am thinking next week when we go back home to get ready we should sit down and talk with her about it??

 

any suggestions ladies to deal with FMILzilla?

 

[BusyBee123]

Turns out I'm going to get my sashes after all! PHEW!

 

Apparently their system couldn't comprehend that I had placed my street address THEN my condo unit number, rather than my unit number THEN street address! Makes all the difference in the world apparently!  For something that's processing tons of credit cards its not very smart!  Oh well, trial and error paid off this time!
 

Originally Posted by BusyBee123 

Hmmm...I can't figure out what the problem is then! My billing address is my home address, the same home address I am trying to have them shipped to!  And we tried this on my both, and my FI cards!  I tried emailing the company and they said there is nothing they can do to help me if the credit card doesn't go through and that they won't accept any other form of payment! Very frustrating! I guess I'll have to buy them from somewhere else!  Good luck with receiving yours!
 

 

 

[JayKay]

Glad to hear you will be getting them!!  Which ones are you getting??
 

Originally Posted by BusyBee123 

Turns out I'm going to get my sashes after all! PHEW!

 

Apparently their system couldn't comprehend that I had placed my street address THEN my condo unit number, rather than my unit number THEN street address! Makes all the difference in the world apparently!  For something that's processing tons of credit cards its not very smart!  Oh well, trial and error paid off this time!
 

 

 

[BusyBee123]

Thanks JayKay! Unfortunately the company was of zero assistance but it worked out in the end!  I was a nervous wreck about it all day! For such a simple thing as sashes! lol!  The things we do for our weddings! 

 

I ended up getting the organza ones in coral. I was hoping to get the satin initially, but the coral colour was too orange-ish and dark! Here's hoping they match! 
 

Originally Posted by JayKay 

Glad to hear you will be getting them!!  Which ones are you getting??
 

 

[JayKay]

I'm glad everything worked out! I'm just waiting to find out exactly how many people before I order mine.  Too bad we aren't using coral or we could have shared!!
 

Originally Posted by BusyBee123 

Thanks JayKay! Unfortunately the company was of zero assistance but it worked out in the end!  I was a nervous wreck about it all day! For such a simple thing as sashes! lol!  The things we do for our weddings! 

 

I ended up getting the organza ones in coral. I was hoping to get the satin initially, but the coral colour was too orange-ish and dark! Here's hoping they match!