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rdhbride

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Just wanted to vent a little based on the same topic. My whole family (mom and dad, 2 sisters and their husbands) were super excited about us having a DW. I asked them all to look into the resorts we liked and choose their favourite, and we would use their opinions in making our decision. Everyone came back with the same answer - IRHS in Jamaica. I told them all the amazing deal that we got and they all encouraged us to book. So I booked! I am super excited! I tell them all the great news that it is official! And...... instead of being excited, they say "that is too expensive, we will look into staying at another resort and coming over the day of the wedding". Now - I have only asked 2 people to be my MOH / bridesmaids - my 2 sisters. Both of them had problems with unreliable people that they chose to be in their wedding parties so I thought I would save myself the hassle and just ask my two best friends, my sisters, to stand for me. (Did I mention that I planned both of their recent weddings and never once complained about anything?). I am so angry (?) at both of them for making me feel like I made a mistake booking. I understand that it is a lot to ask someone to spend that much money to come to your wedding, but if they had told me it was an issue before this whole fiasco, I would not have booked! For them to stay at another resort and then spend $100 on a day pass to come to the wedding, totally defeats the purpose of the entire thing! It would end up costing them almost the same price to do that, but they would miss out on the entire week of fun that comes along with a DW. If you can't afford the place that I picked, don't make me feel guilty about it, just don't come!

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Yep -- I know exactly where you are coming from, sister!!

 

It's so irritating that some people don't understand the importance of getting back an RSVP to a DW bride-to-be so that she can accurately try to plan nice things....for the guests benefit, in the first place!!!

 

Just yesterday, I found out that one of my dear FI's guy friends that we sent an invitation to has had it for close to 3 weeks and hasn't even BOTHERED TO OPEN IT YET!!! I'm mean, he ought to just reach out and slap me in the face because it would hurt less than his blatant disregard for how much money and time I spent on the invitations! So, yes my dear, I FEEL YOUR PAIN and wish my guests would straighten us, as well!

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Ooo! Ooo! Oooo! ... Pick me.... My hand is raised for a turn to vent!

 

Talking to mom last night I was complaining about the number of RSVPs still not returned. She tells me 2 things that just made me want to cry.

 

1. Mom says not to worry about some of their friends because they have been telling my parents that they will be at the AHR. OK cool. I ask if she has kept track of those people and she says (in a very snotty tone) No, because you haven't sent me your RSVP list. OMG! All the RSVPs are coming to my house and she hasn't even asked for the RSVP list. Why can't people just return the pre-addressed, pre-stamped, instructions included, hold you hand RSVP card?!?!?

 

2. I ask mom if she has confirmed the caterer for the AHR. She says no. She has not even booked them (AHR is Jan 2). Personally I would have been doing the AHR planning, but mom was insistent on doing it, so I figured why not accept the help. Her reason for not booking them is that she doesn't know how many people will RSVP. OMG! FML - that just added another 10 things onto my To Do list.

 

But even through all of this FI just makes me laugh and says thats why we moved 1000 miles away from your mom. Not really the reason, but we can at least get a good chuckle over saying it.

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This is all so irritating. I am about to send out my STD's and on the website we put that as soon as you know that you plan to attend to notify us through the website. We are going to send formal invites as well (I think). And I guess get a formal RSVP? I dunno it's all so confusing. But when I make a cutoff for who is attending the wedding, I am going to adhere to it. If you haven't confirmed you are coming there won't be a seat for you at the wedding. Mostly because I'm a bitch but also, if you can't effing send an RSVP back or click a button on a website then you don't get to attend. We are inviting way too many people and are hoping a lot won't make it.

 

If they are booked anyway that's their thing they can have a great vacay and just not be in attendance and won't be on the seating chart.

 

I was thinking of making the final RSVP cutoff like 2 months before though because it seems that's when I need to start confirming numbers for vendors.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by gossip girl View Post
...But when I make a cutoff for who is attending the wedding, I am going to adhere to it. If you haven't confirmed you are coming there won't be a seat for you at the wedding. Mostly because I'm a bitch but also, if you can't effing send an RSVP back or click a button on a website then you don't get to attend...
LMAO!!! smile120.gif
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You are definitely not the only one. My wedding would be, oh three weeks away, and we still haven't received all of our RSVPs. The response card has a STAMPED envelope! How hard is it to say yes / no and send it back? Apparently, this task is quite impossible for many to complete. Even from people who recently got married (& should know better, and "feel our pain"). It's very frustrating. I have called a lot of people, and those we haven't gotten in touch with, I'm not bothering with. If they happen to show up (I doubt it), they will have to get chips and salsa for dinner. HAHA

 

PS. Can we get the money for our stamps back? haha

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OMG so funny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by gossip girl View Post
This is all so irritating. I am about to send out my STD's and on the website we put that as soon as you know that you plan to attend to notify us through the website. We are going to send formal invites as well (I think). And I guess get a formal RSVP? I dunno it's all so confusing. But when I make a cutoff for who is attending the wedding, I am going to adhere to it. If you haven't confirmed you are coming there won't be a seat for you at the wedding. Mostly because I'm a bitch but also, if you can't effing send an RSVP back or click a button on a website then you don't get to attend. We are inviting way too many people and are hoping a lot won't make it.

 

If they are booked anyway that's their thing they can have a great vacay and just not be in attendance and won't be on the seating chart.

 

I was thinking of making the final RSVP cutoff like 2 months before though because it seems that's when I need to start confirming numbers for vendors.

 

We ended up calling a few people that we thought were an actual posibility to show up..and guess what...THEY'RE COMING! While I'm super excited they are coming I was pissed. Did they just assume they would show up and I'd have an extra seat/bag/food, etc...!? We still haven't gotten their card back...its just boggles the mind. And yes...46 still accounted for...all OOT orders were made last night so anyone after yesterday is SOL!

 

And yes...I feel like I should send an invoice for the unused stamp!

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We have received all ours back but my FI's brother. They are distant but thought for sure he would be there.Both parents are deceased and really they are the only family they have. My FI is really hurt and I want to do something but whathuh.gif I have only met him twice and the second time I was by myself at a drug store and all he could say was he is my family but we will never be close if he needs me he knows were I am at. Seriously..... wow!

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