HELP!!! Feeling pretty bad about asking my guests to spend all this money...

CarlaP · September 18, 2009

My situation is slightly different as I live thousands of miles away from my family... so they would have all had to travel anyway. Rather than them spending $$ coming for a long weekend to my wedding, it just made sense to make a weeks vacation out of it.

I've done the same thing - for my friends and family to travel to my new home, it would cost more for a round trip plane ticket than a week all-inclusive at a tropical destination!

SSNM · September 18, 2009

Hi! To answer your questions:

1. Is this right? - if your heart is set on a DW, then yes. BUT, the reality is you have to accept the fact that some won't go to your wedding no matter how cheap of a place you find whether it is for cost or convenience or both. If you can accept that, then it is for you.

2. Have we all felt this way? - I think this is a VERY normal reaction. I first balked at the idea of a DW saying that is too much to ask of someone for "my big day." Then I calculated the cost of a local wedding filled with people I don't even really talk to. Then I reconsidered the DW and saw the lucrativeness of a DW from an economic standpoint as well as something that suits my style better. It was an option I couldn't refuse.

3. How did I spread the word: I started with the word of mouth to my closest people to see if they would be up for making the trip. I had quite a few 'yes' at first, and then they started to get wishy washy. I will send STDs when I have my date confirmed at the resort and use my wedding website for updates.

I have no idea who will come to my DW...it may be just me and FH, it may be the entire clan. Either way, I am getting the wedding I want

svetayasofiya · September 18, 2009

Quote:

Originally Posted by Taylorbride

You have to decide if your going to be okay with it.

Biggest decision you will have as a DW bride... and easier said than done.

Sloan · September 18, 2009

Quote:

Originally Posted by gossip girl

I would rather have a super fun wedding of my dreams with people close to me who will definitely make the trip, than a wedding with tons of people in a boring banquet hall eating crappy food just so more people can afford it.

My thoughts exactly.

Our wedding = our choice. We picked a resort that cost ~ $2000/night. I didn't feel guilty at all. We never held a gun to anyone's head to fork out the cash to come. If you could afford it, great and if not... oh well. We still got married and had a great time with 9 guests. I figure if it's going to break your heart (not your's in particular) not to have the majority of your friends and family around than a DW isn't for you.

Everyone thinks its a super great idea and people are quick to hop on the band wagon to go away for a wedding, but when the time comes to actually pay for it... people start dropping off like flies.

Bottom line. Do what feels right for you and yours.