In laws from h*ll

[MilitaryMrs.s-to be]

Ok, So, My FI parents arn't coming down to the wedding, and his mom constantly shits on me about having the wedding down there, and they its to much money and they can't afford to go....We told them a year before the actual wedding date that we were going and they could made payments to the tour operator, which they still wouldn't do...fine.

 

My FI has been away for almost a year and wanted to come home for a week in July, they flight (return) was $1200, we didn't care much because we wanted him home, So she gives us $400 to help with his flight, we told her to keep it and put it towards coming down south because the down payment was only $300. She said no they couldn't afford it....fine...

 

Earlier this week I get a text message from a number I don't know, so I didn't bother replying. Mike later tells me it was his mom......So now they have a cell phone thats $50 a month, and they still won't come down to the wedding....ok so I'm getting seriously pissed offffff...........

 

Today I had to stop at their house to pick something up, I walk in to the house and whats in the living room, A BRAND NEW LIVING ROOM SET!!!! I'm talking the whole living room, coach, chair, loveset, tables, ottoman.......

 

I'm ready to punch her in the face. Is it just me or is that strange......I'm so tired of her and her stupid drama that she brings on all the time.....I don't know what to do about it.

 

I feel much better now that I got that out!!

[jk1101]

In laws can be so frustrating. I would be pissed too. I know in my first marriage, my ex-inlaws told my parents they would split the wedding with them, then told them they had no money. But they showed up to the engagement party in a brand new Cadillac, and got their house re-sided and a new living room set as well. It's sad but not all parents consider their child's wedding a priority.

 

What does your FI say about all of this. Is he upset that they aren't coming or does he think there might still be a chance they will since there's still some time?

 

Remember if they don't come, it's THEIR loss.

[azulskies]

Wow..that is horrible! If they really wanted to be at their son's wedding, they would be. How does your FI feel about it? If they don't want to come, fine, that'd be one thing. But to continuously harass you about it and try to make you feel guilty about it..that's just so wrong.

 

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that crap...this is supposed to be a happy and exciting time. Well, you'll still have a great day and you'll be enjoying it with those that really want to be there. Good luck hun

[MilitaryMrs.s-to be]

Mike is away right now, until November, So when I talk to him tonight I'm going to tell him that its time he says something to her.

 

She's always make stupid comments to me when he's not around, and he always wants to say something to her but I won't let him becuase I don't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing that shes getting to me, cause I know thats what shes trying to do...urghhh

 

But I'm done, I've had it....He's going to have to say something.

 

As for him and them not being there, the DW was his idea...its what he wanted and talked me into, when they said that they weren't coming I told him, before we book and make it official do you really want to get married without your family there, he said yes, thats where he wants to get married.....But I think they think thats its all my idea.

 

She emailed me and asked me to go to lunch with her and his sister on Saturday, but I can't go because I will tear a strip off her...............

[michelle6114]

Maybe they really cant afford it?

They probably got a furniture store credit card. And a cell phone is a not a big deal, you pretty much HAVE to have one). I don't know what their financial situation is.

When we looked at having a destination wedding, we considered all the people who we thought "needed" to go. My FI parents are pretty well off, his sister is as well, and my mom and sister said they would save up and never miss it. Anyone else going is an added bonus. But I would never expect anyone to go without necessities just to be able to see me get married.

I know it sucks that they won't be there. But aside from paying their way, there is not much you can do.

[LadyTrunck]

It's good that your FI is ok with it. Just live and let live, don't let it bother you.

[brandynd]

I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through! In laws have a tendency to be difficult, and I don't mean to sound crass, I'm just playing the devil's advocate, but something that we all have to remember is that the location we pick for our weddings may sound like a vacation to us, but not necessarily to those who we're inviting. Maybe they're saying that they cannot afford it, not just due to the money they'll have to spend, but the vacation time from work as well. Perhaps they don't want to use their vacation hours to go down there, because they have something else planned?

I don't know. Maybe if you sit down and talk to her, and calmly voice your concerns and get things out on the table it will get better. Good luck hun!