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Questioning if we will have an AHR at all?!?


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Through the course of the past year, Fiance' and I have been back and forth on having an AHR... Lately we have decided to have one.

 

Our dilemma is cost related. We are BOTH going to be in nursing school this semester (Fiance's 2nd year, my 1st). I can't help but think of that money going towards bills or something in case I need to quit my job...

 

At this point Im at the verge of having either a send-off BBQ or even a 1 year anniversary celebration. What do you think?

 

I also thought about sending invites to more people besides the 50 we intended to invite.. so that I wont feel guilty for not having an AHR? Is that wrong... knowing that most wont be able to make it...

 

HELP!!!!

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Originally Posted by August2010Bride View Post
Through the course of the past year, Fiance' and I have been back and forth on having an AHR... Lately we have decided to have one.

Our dilemma is cost related. We are BOTH going to be in nursing school this semester (Fiance's 2nd year, my 1st). I can't help but think of that money going towards bills or something in case I need to quit my job...

At this point Im at the verge of having either a send-off BBQ or even a 1 year anniversary celebration. What do you think?

I also thought about sending invites to more people besides the 50 we intended to invite.. so that I wont feel guilty for not having an AHR? Is that wrong... knowing that most wont be able to make it...

HELP!!!!

You need to do what works for you both.

I am having a AHR but that's because I'm getting married in Mexico, but live all the way over in the UK! so we've only got 20 people coming to our ceremony. We decided on the reception back home to celebrate our marriage with those that couldn't make the trip (or afford it!).

You can do AHR quite cheap though so take the time to look around and shop for what's reasonable.

At the end of the day, if any money spent is too much, don't do it - nobody is going to hate you for putting the money you do have towards your nursing school fees.

Maybe its best to do one at 1 year, then you'll know more if you can afford to do it then or not.

Hope that helps.

Katie.
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I agree totally with Katie. We're getting married in Australia, but with only 15 of our close family. We haven't invited anyone else because we want it to be a small ceremony. However, to celebrate when we get back with all our friends and extended family we're having a small bash at a local hotel. Nothing too fancy, and I think you'd be surprised what you can do with not too much money if you want too!

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I understand your predicament. My initial plan was just to have a few close family members over to my sister's house to watch the wedding video. But it seems that there are going to be more people coming than we expected so we had to rent a space to have the reception. Its still going to be pretty cheap though. Of course, the decision is up to you! BBQ's are always fun and can be pretty inexpensive but if you feel you just don't have time to put something together, a 1 year anniversary is always good too. Good luck!

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We just had our send-off bbq/picnic this weekend and it was a huge success. We had about 100 people come and total cost ended up being about $1500 (we ended up getting too much food and drinks and you could probably do it for less if you have less people). We bought everything at BJ's/Costco in bulk so that helped with cost.

 

Everyone had a blast and the weather was perfect. We prepped and cooked all the food ourselves which helped keep the cost down, and had our close friends and family bring some side dishes. We grilled all the food there at once and put them in chafing trays to keep them hot and put the cold dishes (salads, etc.) in trays and then stuck those in additional trays that had ice in them to keep them cold. That way, FH and his friend didn't have to be cooking the entire time. We hired another friend who knew how to bartend be a bartender for the day.

 

One thing you have to worry about is weather. If it rains, you will need to have an alternative plan. We made sure we rented a picnic area that had a large covered pavilion. If it had rained, we had planned to do a huge poker tournament with the winner getting a 50/50 jackpot.

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  • 5 months later...

I wish we never even considered having an AHR. I just thought it was something we had to do. I spent so much time thinking about it & worrying about it. Then i was so relieved when my brother got engaged and planned to get married right after me. It would be too much for the summer, so we canceled our AHR. Huge relief!

 

My inlaws ended up throwing us a small AHR the day after my brother's wedding. It was great. It was small, simple & I didn't have to plan it.

 

We also canceled the one where we live, because the couple who's house it was going to be at decided to sell. Another relief. I just don't think I was at all interested in AHRs. I wonder why I felt so obligated in the first place.

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I thought of having an AHR but only if it wouldn't cost us too much money!

I'm from Georgia and my family is HUGE! so the FI and I will probably end up having a BBQ at my grandmother's house. Hopefully, we won't spend a bunch of money!

Then again, I don't think anyone is expecting us to have an AHR so maybe we won't.

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