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Before or After???


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We were going to have a legal ceremony in Mexico, but decided against it when we found out they are keeping our certified birth certificates.  We told our family to give them the opportunity to still come to Mexico or not.  It also gives those that weren't going to Mexico a chance to see us exchange our vows.

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We decided to get legally married before going to Mexico just to avoid the hassle and expense of marrying there. We had a few friends who wanted to come to JOP since they couldn't make the trip and Ken's uncle happen to be staying with us so he joined us too. We did NOT take our children or tell them because I didn't want it to be confusing to them. Some family members asked about the legalities of getting married in Mexico and I told them what we were doing because I didn't want to lie to them.

 

This is become a pretty heated topic on some of the etiquette sites ... some feel it's dishonest and that if you're already married then when you go to your DW it is a renewal of vows and this should be disclosed. It is not appropriate to register or expect gifts for a vow renewal so some feel brides/grooms are not lying to get more gifts.

 

I personally don't (and didn't) feel that way at all. We told our JOP that we were going to Mexico and she was excited for us. She still took her time and did a very nice little message/ceremony for us. We both teared up and it was a special day for us ... but we both agreed that we will ONLY celebrate our DW as our anniversary and our ceremony. It was just as special and not at all the same as going to the JOP and for us it didn't take away from our ceremony at all.

 

On a funny note ... we did exchange bands at the JOP and we all went out for some food and drinks after. That night we slipped our bands off and I felt a little sad LOL. But it was worth it ... our DW ceremony was only a week later! ;)

 

I say do what's best for you and I definitely vote for BEFORE because you are soooo exhausted after that you will feel like it's a chore. LOL

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