Can you ask guests to "rsvp" to a STD?

[Can'tHardlyWait]

Since I am officially in the process of booking the Xcaret, (YAY!!!) I am now starting to think about STD. Here is my issue: Is it tacky to ask guests to rsvp to our STD? The thing is, my FIL are going to pay for our guests' rooms and AI (I know, how great are they?), which means we need to have atleast a rough estimate of how many rooms to book.

 

Would it be better to just send them out without an rsvp and just make phone calls to everyone a couple of weeks after they get them?

 

I know its still really early, but I am just SOOO excited about everything and I really want to have this all booked!

[RaydensMama]

I dont really think you should ask people to RSVP to a STD because the purpose of the STD is to give people time to see if they can afford to come or not. I think you would be better off just waiting a little longer to block your rooms, since you do have tons of time still.

[MikkiStreak]

We asked them for tentative information. We included a postcard and explained that because the resort books quickly, we wanted to have a tentative headcount for reserving room blocks, etc... We didn't ask for quantities of people, just yes, they knew they were going to attend; no, they knew they couldn't; and a still up in the air option.... We got about 3/4 of the ones we sent out back from people.

 

I can say this tho---- in our case, after I had sent them out, a part of me wished I wouldn't. Like they say, 'hindsight is 20/20'.... If I would have stepped back from the guest list and looked at it objectively, I would have had a realistic idea of where to start with room blocks, head counts, etc....

[Ashleigh]

On my STD I told them to visit my website, and RSVP. But, I do not have a lot of people going.... All the people I asked to go are going, so I just told them to RSVP so I would know the number of REAL invitations to mail out.

[Can'tHardlyWait]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikkiStreak We asked them for tentative information. We included a postcard and explained that because the resort books quickly, we wanted to have a tentative headcount for reserving room blocks, etc... We didn't ask for quantities of people, just yes, they knew they were going to attend; no, they knew they couldn't; and a still up in the air option.... We got about 3/4 of the ones we sent out back from people. I can say this tho---- in our case, after I had sent them out, a part of me wished I wouldn't. Like they say, 'hindsight is 20/20'.... If I would have stepped back from the guest list and looked at it objectively, I would have had a realistic idea of where to start with room blocks, head counts, etc....

Can I ask why you would have done it differently? Is it just that the rsvp wasn't necessary because you could have figured it out or was it something else? The thing is, we are inviting 150 people and I know that 100 or so are definitely going to come, but the other 50 people are complete unknowns.

I originally wanted to put the rsvp on my website like Ashleigh suggested, but I am worried not enough people will go to the website for it to be effective. Hmmm...

[Adamsgrrl]

So wait your FIL's are paying for ALL your Guests

[amyh]

I enclosed a prelim RSVP postcard with our STD's and am really excited to I did.

 

Our wedding is until July 4, 2008. We sent our STD's in April and asked for a prelim response by July 4, 2007.

So far we've recieved about 70+ "yes and maybe" responses. I'm happy we did this because there were a few that responded yes whom we had assuned they were def not going.

 

Bottom line- I see know problem with it as long as you give them you let them know that it is a prelim response.

[MikkiStreak]

Quote:

Originally Posted by GalitInNY Can I ask why you would have done it differently? Is it just that the rsvp wasn't necessary because you could have figured it out or was it something else? The thing is, we are inviting 150 people and I know that 100 or so are definitely going to come, but the other 50 people are complete unknowns. I originally wanted to put the rsvp on my website like Ashleigh suggested, but I am worried not enough people will go to the website for it to be effective. Hmmm...

There were a few reasons why I wished I would have just skipped the tentative RSVP on the STD. First, my instincts were pretty accurate. I got back responses that pretty much matched 90% of my assumptions. That alone would have been enough of an idea for what to do with room blocks and planning numbers. Second, I think when I got the no's back, I sat there thinking to myself, 'so now what? Do I ask them to tell me that again in a formal invite a couple months away from the wedding?' About half of our guest list is older generations, so I think it might be a little confusing to have to submit 2 RSVP's from the STD and the formal invite. Third, I opened the door to hand-written comments on the response cards. And, some of the family was pretty vocal in expressing their displeasure over a destination wedding. That kind of deflated my enthusiasm a bit and now I'm more hesitant about wanting to include people.... I just wasn't very prepared for those responses from family...

I would say that if you're inviting 150 and you already expect 100 confirmations, then drop about 25-30% of that number and use that for a starting point in room blocks and such. Just talk to your TA/resort about what happens if you need to add/remove some of the rooms in your block so you're clear on how it impacts your finances...

[-Kate-]

I just put our website on the std and told them to visit. On the site we told them about how Dreams books up and they should RSVP as soon as possible. People started RSVPing on their own. At the 6-7 month point I sent out an email informing people that we would be releasing the first block of rooms and to get it in gear. At this point - about 6 months out - I know what about 90% of our guest list is doing.

[dragonfly]

Are you letting people know ahead of time that the accomadations, and ai are paid for? This will surely determine if people say yes or not. By the way really great of you fil.