Venue Communication Floods In..& So Do the Problems

[Ayita]

First of all, know that communication is often hard with WC. My hotel first told me they did not have one, then they had one, we started, then she quit, then I started with an external one, then the hotel got a new one, I had to resend her everything that had been agreed with both the external and the former internal WC... irritant, loss of time, stressing... but not unusual unfortunately. At least, you get answers !!!! It's not the case of all brides so look at the bright side

 

As regards the ceremony : personally I had actually never thought of NOT having either a minister, or a friend, do our (symbolic) ceremony. I wanted something professional and moving. I am surprised to read that WC actually sometimes perform ceremonies... I would never have asked. Anyway... if your WC has never done one... well maybe you don't want to take the risk and it's better to ask a friend !

 

Ot try other ministers eventually. Mine cost only $300 (not 400).

[BillysBride]

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanielleNDerek Savannah does she realize your having a symbolic ceremony? Her response makes it sound like your trying to get legally married in Mexico.

You guys, I SWEAR, I have repeated it in almost every email. It was part of the intitial info SHE requested yesterday "Type of Ceremony (civil/vow renewal)" on the info form. I've said it in like ten different ways, 12 different times. lol It's amazing. I feel like I'm starting to frustrate her, not that I give a damn. We're BOTH getting frustrated, but on my side, I cannot fathom why the hell she is saying what she is unless she truly doesn't know the difference.

Ayita-I hadn't thought of having staff perform it either til I seen it was the norm. If they won't let staff to do it, I'll get a pro. Family/friends performing it is just not for us. I'd be uncomfortable and feel even more like it wasn't really a ceremony. I'd also feel like the guests were feeling the same, like the ceremony wasn't real or meaningful. "Hell, thats Uncle Joe up there...they are sooo not married!" lol Don't ask me why, but having a staff member do it would be fine.

My latest response...am I being unclear? WHAT AM I DOING WRONG??!! ARRRRGH!

R*****,

I am not understanding.

Since the ceremony is not legally binding, why would the officiant need to have official permission from Mexico? We will be legally married here in the U.S. either before the wedding or after our return from Mexico. This is just a ceremony for our family and friends to witness and enjoy.

Please clarify.

[DanielleNDerek]

well if doesnt get any easier to understand than the last email you just sent her. hopefully she understands its not legal now. lol i hope she does!

[BillysBride]

Her response. I am so done. Seriously...DONE. Can't deal with any more today. Am typing a response to her and will probably NOT be reading anything else I receive til tomorrow. I'm going to forward this crap to the TA and see what she is able to do.

 

 

From her:

 

A minister is a professional, has knowledge and experience in symbolic ceremonies and give to the couple a certificate to remember that special date.

 

I do not think anyone could have the same value as a minister.

 

I understand that is not a legally, but The community of ministers cannot act outside the law, if one foreign wishes to act as Minister in Mexico for pleasure or business has to ask permission and the hotel is obliged to inform you.

 

If any other doubt, do not hesitate to let me know.

 

I'm forwarding this nonsense to the TA and seeing what she has to say. This is ridiculous. Anyway, here's my final response for the day:

 

R****,

 

I have talked to many, many brides, including my sister, who have had either family members stand in and lead their symbolic ceremonies, or had the on site wedding coordinators offer to do it. That is where my confusion is coming from as I have never heard of it being a problem. We do not care about whether the person is a professional or a member of the ministry; that is not a personal requirement to us. We plan to write our own vows and do not need an expert to simply lead us through them. The ceremony will be short and very traditional. If we were to choose someone from the wedding party to lead it, they would not be conducting business or getting paid for their participation.

 

It was a complete suprise to me that this is something that the Avalon is unfamiliar with, so please bear with me as I try to figure out what is best to do. If having someone outside of the "community of ministers" perform the ceremony is not an option, we need to know that specifically. Ofcourse, anything that adds additional cost to the wedding needs to be taken into consideration for us with our budget.

 

So very simply, I need to know if we are able to have a regular member of our wedding party, NOT a professional, lead us through the ceremony and if having the on site coordinator do it is an option. If we had a family member do it, they are obviously not a member of any professional clergy.

 

I hope this clarifies our needs and desires. If it is simply the hotel's policy not to allow non-clergy to lead ceremonies, that is something we need to know. I know it is not the policy throughout Mexico since as I've stated, we know many people who have married in Mexico and had either family or coordinators perform the ceremony.

[stefnicole]

I just don't really understand her response to you. Is she saying that having a non-minister conduct a symbolic ceremony is illegal? I'm not sure she knows what she's saying.

[BillysBride]

This has been nagging at the back of my brain all day, ofcourse. So I thought I'd turn to my friendly BDW search engine to see if any other brides had ever encountered any info that might help our sitch. I can across this..from SanFranSarah, who was married just a few months ago at Ana y Jose. I'm wondering if THIS is what the corporate wc is referring to, only she doesn't realize she needs to tell me it's referencing NEW law??

Hi (again) Ana y Jose friends. I emailed jackie re: officiant and she got right back to me saying this: "there is a new law that allows only professional officiants for ceremonies (with or without a pay) that also have a legal working permit to officiate in Mexico. This is a new law and there is not much information on how to get the permit etc, and it is changing a lot of plans for many of our future brides, so we will still allow anyone you want to marry you, no problem" Whew. . . . . . .

 

If this is what the deal is about, then I'm still wondering why she can't just say, plainly "it is against the law in the country of Mexico for anyone who is not specifically licensed to perform weddings, either civil or symbolic." lol..KWIM? IF that is the case, then wouldn't it be obvious by now where my confusion is coming from? Not sure why SHE is confused if this is the new law..should be clear that I'm unaware of the restriction.

 

I'm trying to find what I can about any new laws enacted in 2009..nothin yet. Anyone come across this and know anything I'd really appreciate a head's up.

[foxytv]

Wow - what drama. Glad its worked out.

 

We did our symbolic ceremony in the DR and while we did have a minister officiate, our WC read the translation. But, while we were supposed to sign a non-binding certificate, we were never asked to, which is a bummer, but oh well. We were legally married before we left.

[EDSROSA]

Hey Savanah, I had a similar problem with my WC in Punta Cana. At first I felt that she was pushing the legal fees on me. Doing a symbolic wedding saved us a lot of $$. Well after that was clarified she insisted on telling me that a lawyer had to do the ceremony, she COULD NOT do it. After a phone call with her we got everything in place. She did tell me that she thought a "professional" had to do the symbolic ceremony and then the hotel manager corrected her. Let us know what happens.