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STILL CONFUSED about receiving GIFTS ...Advice?


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Mayan Bride - i will be hosting an open house / bbq back home after we return. This is to celebrate with the friends and family who could not attend. we will supply the food and drinks. This way it doesnt look like we are asking for stuff (cause were not) we just want the others to feel included in our day.

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I'm not really sure what to expect as far as gifts at the DW. I don't plan on saying one way or the other on invitations or anything. We are,however, having a big reception at home when we return. Our families have traditional beliefs and we are thankful they're accepting our having a DW, but they want us to share our celebration with the rest of our family too, so we are having a reception at home just like we would have had if we had the wedding at home. I don't expect people to bring gifts to either, especially the DW, but for the AHR I'm pretty sure everyone will bring gifts like they normally would to a wedding at home. I mentioned to some family members about requesting no gifts, but I was advised that some people would feel bad not giving a gift or just truly feel good about helping out. My take on is it that I'm not expecting gifts, but if I get them, great :) I wouldn't complain.

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Originally Posted by mayanbride78 View Post
Hmmmm, now what if your MOH (sister) and mother want to throw you a wedding shower for their close friends who can't celebrate the wedding with you in MX. They're mostly family friends. I also have some friends who've said from the get-go that they cant go to the wedding but want to celebrate whatever we decide to do at home (shower, reception etc). My mom insists her friends dont care if they weren't invited to Mexico they want to come to the shower.
I'm very uncomfortable inviting ppl coming to the wedding to the shower b/c it looks like i want gifts! And I really don't!! But I want them to be apart of any celebration we have. Can I have 2 invitations, one for my mom's friends with a registry and another for ppl. coming to MX stating they are coming only to eat and drink?!!!... And not mention that I'm registered anywhere. Is it weird to have some ppl. bringing gifts and others not? Ahhh...!
I would not give two different types of invites. Something about it screams poor form as one group is told they don't have to bring gifts and another group is not...

Look at it this way; you are not inviting them since you are not throwing the shower; your family is. Let them deal with it. You just be greatful for whatever comes your way and enjoy it! Anyone who comes will come because they want to and they will get you what they see fit. Whenever I get someone a gift and they tell me I didn't have to do it I respond "I don't have to do sh*t; I just did it because I wanted to." If I didn't want to get a gift, I would simply not go to the event and that would be that.
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