What to say to friends that are not invited?

[NyBeachBride]

me and my fi invited the people who truly matter....i alone have 100 people in my family, he has another 50 and then another 30 of friends...thats too much to chance it with our budgte and then invites would be very expensive....so we narrowed it down to the ost important and people in our live snot the cousin or uncle we never see...and no coworkers so noone feels bad, and i really dont like work people in my personal life anyways...funny because we did mostly 2 per invite...and if u are single then one per that invite....we had to be really strong on this because people assumed they could bring their boyfriend or 5 kids!! i sent out the stds addressed to the people invited...but people didnt realize what it meant, so i got emails rsvping saying yeah add me plus 3 or whatever....so on the std i said to please informally rsvp, so i sent out a message thru my wedding website , basically a reminder abotu the wedding and to not forget to rsvp, and in there i put, please make sure to confirm how many guests per invite before you book! this was people are not inviting peopel i dont even know

[luciel2820]

We're doing an AHR also so we're actually inviting close friends and family to the DW and everyone else to the AHR, and if anyone asks we just wanted something small away from home because it would also be our vacation

[echo2_62]

It sounds like a lot of other people are having an AHR, but we decided that both of us were happy not going that route. I remember a comment from a friend of mine that she made about many of our coworkers when she got married.It sounds a bit harsh maybe, but I thought was rather true at the same time. She'd said "you generally work with people out of obligation/necessity and you all work best when you all get along well - so naturally you will develop your 'work friends' but if those friendships don't really extend past the walls of the office, then how well do those people really know you as a couple and how important is it that they are attending one of the most important days of your life?".In continuation of that she also said that if the borderline friends were people that you like to be around if you happen to see them, but wouldn't make your invite list for the big summer bbq bash in your backyard, then do they need to come to your wedding? Neither of these things are to say that you don't enjoy that persons friendship or that you don't value them, simply that it might not be the worst thing in the world if they don't get invited.