Gift etiquette

[Jess]

people that can't come are going to want to send you gifts - I would register

[Hartyt509]

I haven't registered anywhere and only 4 people have asked what we want for a wedding present lol

 

One was FI's sister and he said cash for a new TV lol the other was FMIL and he said the same (cash for the wedding would have been nice the cow lol)

 

My m8 asked me on Sat and I said nothing but thanks and the other was one of the girls coming to the wedding and I told her coming was enough lol

 

We won't get asked my family are pretending I haven't told them about the wedding the idiots lol

[jenniebey]

Quote:

Originally Posted by soon2bePowers We did not want to register BUT we knew that people would be buying us stuff. We decided to register but not to advertise it. We figured if people are planning to buy us something they will look for a registry. If someone was not planning to buy a gift, since we didn't discuss registry they wouldn't even know that we had. We are also established with a house but we registered for a nicer set of dishes (not china but a fun set), more towels and sheets, better set of cookware, table setting stuff, nice serving ware, etc. Hope this helps

We're doing the exact same thing. I don't expect gifts but I know from my friends' experience people will give them. I'd rather get something I want than something we don't need or like.

[BelizeBride]

Perhaps I am going to sound a bit materialistic, but I think receiving gifts is one of the best parts of getting married. When else do you ever get gifts as an adult? For me, its not that often. My fiance and I registered at two stores and have enjoyed receiving each and every gift. I think all couples should register. If you truly don't need anything, I like the idea of asking people to make a donation to a charity (of either your choosing or theirs).

[Soon2bMrsRosa]

I love the idea of registering but not advertising that you are registered! That way when people ask you can give it to them and if some were not expecting to buy a gift they would not feel pressured. Great idea!!!!!

[bumbles]

Originally, I didn't plan on registering because I didn't want any gifts. A card with a sweet note or attendance to the wedding would have been great! A friend who recently got married told me to just register anyway because people will ask and there'd be a shower. Sure enough, they did and there was. Bed Bath and Beyond is great.

 

We put this message on our website:

 

"Your presence is most important to us. If you insist, we have a registry, although gifts truly are not necessary or expected. Your smiling faces on the beach will do!"

 

Hope this helps!

[~*Lisa*~]

OH I like that quote, what a great idea!

 

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by bumbles Originally, I didn't plan on registering because I didn't want any gifts. A card with a sweet note or attendance to the wedding would have been great! A friend who recently got married told me to just register anyway because people will ask and there'd be a shower. Sure enough, they did and there was. Bed Bath and Beyond is great.   We put this message on our website:   "Your presence is most important to us. If you insist, we have a registry, although gifts truly are not necessary or expected. Your smiling faces on the beach will do!"   Hope this helps!

[TinaM2b]

Quote:

Originally Posted by bumbles "Your presence is most important to us. If you insist, we have a registry, although gifts truly are not necessary or expected. Your smiling faces on the beach will do!" Hope this helps!

Great quote!! I may add something similar to our website!

In our case, both me and my fiance have worked at the same place for 20 years, and we have extended family and several different circles of friends that we hang out with a lot. We know our friends/co-workers and no matter what we say, many or most of them will want to do something. We are not having an AHR, but probably a party in a few months. We will have a couple showers before the wedding. We went ahead and registered at several stores and honeymoonwishes.com. I found out about honeymoonwishes in the registry section on this BDW site.

honeymoonwishes is a pretty cool site that allows you to put things you would like on the site but you get cash when it is all said and done. I put things like flowers for our hotel rooms, snacks for our rooms, upgrades to our rooms, honeymoon lunch / dinner, spa treatments for me and my FH and a special shopping section. In the shopping section, I put some local artisan type stores that don't have registries but are fun to shop at (wine store, handmade pottery shop, local artisan market, etc). I made a point to mention the shopping section at the top of the page to inform people if they wanted to keep their money local, they could actually go to these stores.

Like another poster said, it is our time and when else do you get gifts as an adult!!

[ACH2009]

We were not planning to register either however my FMIL wanted to throw me a shower so we ended up starting a registry at Macy's and Bed, Bath and Beyond. Well we ended up having three showers so far and now our living room is filled with gifts! Plus I know whenever I can't attend a wedding or shower I always send a gift. I think people who can't attend would like to be able to send a gift in their absence.

[Amarillis]

We registered at Sears - we originally were not going to register, but with pressure from friends and family, we decided to. It ended up being a great decision, because even if people didn't buy things from our registry (for both shower and wedding gifts) they were able to see our taste and our style through items we had chosen ourselves. Thus I did not receive any wild, off colour items at my shower, everything was my taste.

 

It was fun too!