Am I crazy?/What would you do?

[starchild]

Jill makes a good point, that is a possibility. I think that for anyone if you are concerned it is all in the delivery, i.e. saying "no" or "don't" or "you can't" is not cool, but expressing your concerns and leaving it up to them to decide is alright.

 

Men are not going to spend their day quietly reflecting on your love and the life-changing ceremony ahead of them, so even if they stay close they may still be getting plastered at the pool bar while you're off at the spa.

 

Bottom line it comes down to your man and how well you know him, but then again if you know he'll come back drunk or tired and mess up the ceremony that is a whole other issue...

[Rhonda]

Ladies,

Thanks to all your responses/reasonings I've had a lot to think about...but, it really wasn't difficult...I totally agree that he SHOULD do what he wants...Our relationship has never been based on control...in fact that's what I love about it! My FI asked me simply out of respect for me. But, if he had just told me he was going, I would have been fine too! Sometimes, I think all of this wedding decision making gets to me...I start overthinking everything!

 

I hadn't thought about the "getting drunk or sunburnt" part of the whole thing, which certainly could happen and now I think that's a bigger concern. But, anyway, he's responsible and I totally trust that he won't compromise our wedding day.

 

Regarding the other guests...my initial concern was that if he went fishing for 4-5 hours the day after they arrived (the day before our wedding), then, they'd be like "we traveled all the way to Mexico for him and then he takes off with his buddies".

But, honestly, I don't think that's a big deal anymore..I think you're right...it's his vacation, so, he should do whatever makes him happy...plus, he would have plenty of other time to spend with them....AGAIN, just me overthinking things...

Boy, I can't wait for this whole thing to be over! (well, not really!)

[1elephant]

dh and his friends (and dad!) went go-carting (i think that's what it was) on the streets of mx, followed by a tequila tour. i just told him to be careful. if i was going to be with the girls, why couldn't he go do a guy thing, kwim? i also didn't care if my guests understood or not - it was our wedding day, not every day. they really couldn't expect to be hanging out with us all day.