AHR drama!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Alipires1]

So I told everyone that when we came home we were having a reception in August. Two of my bridesmaids are making it very difficult to organize a reception.

 

My DH is a police officer and he is trying to plan the wedding so that his platoon is off so they may attend the wedding.

 

One of my bridesmaids called and said she is taking a vacation to Europe from August 6-August 20. There are 3 weekends in August we can actually have the wedding and two of them fall when she is away. My other girlfriend is having a 30th birthday party for her bf on the only other available day for us...the 29th.

 

No matter what I do someone is going to be pissed. I tried to ask my girlfriend to move the date of the party to either the 22 of August or the 12 of September because these are dates she is available, but my DH is not, and she said no. She said she "is going to be bitter now." It is a backyard birthday party guest of honor's birthday is 9/11.

 

Then she said just have the wedding without her. This would mean her bf...who is also in the wedding wouldn't be able to make it. Her bf's parents are really close to DH's family, so they wouldn't be able to make it either. Her sister, who I am also close with, and all of our friends would have to choose which party to attend. I feel really badly about asking her to move the date, but there aren't a lot of options.

 

DH doesn't want to go into September. WTF!!!!!

[big3n09]

I'm a little confused are you saying they can't make the reception or the actual wedding? If it's the DW they can get tricky because everybody is not going to be there bottom line. You and DH have to decide what you guys want and who you can live without being there. Like you said somebody is going to be pissed and as long as it's not you or DH, then that's ok. I understand how the scheduling thing works I am a Paramedic and there are a few people at work I want to invite but they are on different shifts so they may can't make it but the show must go on. FI grandparents whom I love are like 90 and I don't think they will be able to make the trip and I know they would love to but thie is what we want and we a going to have it without tmen unfortunately. As long as you #1 people ( parents, siblings, other VIP's) can make it I would choose the date that works best for both of you. Remember everybody is not going to come, even the people you think may or say they are may not when it's time. If it's the reception then if they can't stop by for a few minutes that day to support you guys then, again the show must go on.

[KLC77]

Sorry, I'm confused too. They can't make the AHR or are you having another ceremony at the AHR or will they miss the wedding?

[Alipires1]

I mean the at home reception, but we are doing a mini ceremony, so our friends and family who couldn't be there can still see us "get married". It was a compromise we did with his mother, because she was upset that the grandparents would miss seeing us take our vows. So we are calling it a renewal and a local decan is going to bless the marriage.

[big3n09]

Ok, so I would pick a date that works for the both of you guys if they can't be there for about 30 min maybe for the mini ceremony or stop by just to show there support then I would not be changing things around for them. I assume you are taliking about at the most a 4 hour event and if they cant fit you in for 30min to an hour that day then oh well. The friend that will be out of town may just miss it. Are these people going to be at the DW ceremony because if so then at least they were part of something, can't please everybody and you and DH should be the one's that matter most.

[boscobel]

I would choose whichever day you want. Since there is no "winning", you might as well chose what works best for you. It really sucks having to work around people schedules, but August is such a busy month for people, so I can understand the other people might have stuff going on (as I am sure you do too, didn't mean to imply otherwise...)

[KLC77]

I agree. I was in my friends wedding that was on a cruise, but I couldn't make it to her AHR. It was not a big deal. I was there for the real thing! You should pick the date that works for you and your FI. As for your friend that is having the bday party, I assume she has put some time and effort into her planning as well, so I could see her being upset she would have to change the date. But there is more than one day in a weekend. Can you guys do the party one day and your friends party the other day of the same weekend (sat/sun)?

[Alipires1]

Well so far things aren't going well. These are the only two days we can get at either hall. My girlfriend that is having her bf's bday party said she is not willing to try to change it. My other friends said to chose the date at the nicer hall because I am getting the same price(but is also the date of by friends bf's party.)

 

I just feel really badly either way. I offered to pay to have the invitations reprinted because she said she already ordered them, and I offered to help clean her sisters yard with her to help so we could possible move the party one week up, but I think she is using the date anyway. Oh well I have to remind myself that you can't please everyone.

[Soon To Be Mrs. Gomez]

Yes. You cannot please everyone so don't worry. Plan the date you want! You are still the bride.

[lgarner83]

I would actually have it on one of the dates that your friend who will be in Europe will be away. This way only one person won't be able to make it (and she can't be bitter, she'll be living it up in Europe!) and your other BM will be able to make it (it sounds like she has a lot invested into this party and this party might mean as much to her as your reception means to you) along with her sister and other mutual friends. This way that group will not have to choose and everyone will have a great time.