My Marriage is Over!!!

[foxytv]

Erica - I am just curious - do you know what his feelings are on this whole situation now? Is he remorseful and sees the errors of his ways - or his he mad and blaming him being in jail on you? I know you said there is a court order for no contact - but I just figured somehow you probably had gotten some feedback. What about his family? How are they responding/reacting? Can he not make bail and go into a rehab center until his court date? Also, what are the sets of charges against him? I don't recall seeing that but maybe I missed it.

 

As I said earlier -- You are doing the right thing, and I'm glad to see that you are staying strong.

[DanielleNDerek]

Hopefully he wont be in remand for that long and when he's there he will have time to reflect and realize he has to get better.

[stacey]

Im sorry, but can someone please tell me what a remand is? is is a jail, or something else?

[EricaG]

He was a mess when I talked to him on Sat before the conditions were on. He was remorseful, then he was upset because I called the police, then he understood why I did, then crying because he knew he messed up and that he would probably face jail time.

 

As for the charges, he said there were 6 charges on Sat, but I'm not completely sure on all of them. There is breach of probation, one count of assault(for banging my head into the wall) and then theres uttering threats (Not sure if this is the other 4 charges or if there were other charges laid for something else.

Bail was set high at $3000 and no one that has that is willing to lose it if he messes up again, so he will be in there until his court date, unless someone finally splurges on him.

[big3n09]

Stay strong and remember everything happens for a reason. This may be his turning point so don't say it's over yet(for better or for worse), until you know you have done all you can hang in there he needs you even if it's for you to teach him a lesson.

[pryzeless]

This situation is really hard but it seems like you are doing all the right things. Stay strong and think of what a wonderful thing your doing for your kids! Best of Luck.

[MarieSam]

Quote:

Originally Posted by EricaG As for the charges, he said there were 6 charges on Sat, but I'm not completely sure on all of them. There is breach of probation, one count of assault(for banging my head into the wall) and then theres uttering threats (Not sure if this is the other 4 charges or if there were other charges laid for something else.

Wait Erica, banging your head into the wall and threatening you?? Did he get violent with you too? Did I miss this?

[EricaG]

Stacey - The remand center is like jail but it is where people go while they wait for their court appearances. Rather than having them sit in the cells under the RCMP detachment in the holding cells, they go to a maximum security remand center. Then if they are convicted and have to go to jail, they are transferred from the remand to the jail they will be staying in. I have heard that it is not a very nice place to be at all!!!

 

MarieSam - All he did physically was bang my head against the wall, but if I would have tried to take the kids out of the apt that night, I know that it would have been a lot more than that. When he drinks, he gets into these rages and everything in life that isn't wonderful becomes my fault! He has this look of hate and evil in his eyes and there is no sign of the man I loved or married. As soon as he sobers up he is back to himself and starts apologizing for what was said and done, which usually he doesn't remember anything or only bits and parts. Then come the promises of never drinking again and blah, blah, blah!

[Kelly C]

Erica, Im telling you I was married to one of them and he is still the same. He hasnt spent time in jail. But has lost everything. And now found someone else to get married too. I feel so sorry for her, she is a really sweet girl. NO matter what you have done the right thing for you and your children.

[FutureMrsLewis]

I really hope that he can get the help that he so desperately needs. Hopefully when he does get his day in court, even if he has already served his time in remand and won't need any extra jail time, they send him to rehab or something similar, because he needs to know the severity of his alcoholism and will never lead a satisfying life until he can get past it.

 

And it's great to see that you're staying so strong and that you've already realized that you did the right thing. You did what was right for yourself, your children, and also your husband. You're awesome, and one day I hope he'll thank you for what you're doing for him right now, because he needs this more than he'll ever know.