Cold feet!

[meghanmbm]

Is anyone else getting cold feet? I am starting to really freak out about the whole wedding/marriage thing. Not sure why, my man is the most wonderful person i have ever met. I think money is playing a big part. Please tell me i am not the only one.

[Chanti]

Hi Meghan, I think it's normal to have cold feet no matter how much you love the person you're with (my main reason for cold feet is that this is my second mariage)... Mariage is a big commitment and requires work: it's not all fun and games. The beauty of a DW is that you can easilty minimize costs: you don't need to splurge like some do, it can be meaningful and totally special without spending a fortune. You definitely need to discuss a budget and try to keep within that established financial commitment, but a DW should be cheaper than a traditional wedding. Some resorts even have free wedding packages and in that case all you really need to worry about is your wedding clothes!

Good luck, and you're not alone :-)

[BachataBride]

I agree with Chanti...but you have to beware of the "free" wedding packages. That is the route we are going, but you still have to pay to get your documents translated if you don't do the legal thing before you go (we paid $560 US), there are judges fees that the "free" wedding doesn't cover (ours is $610 US), plus any extras you'll need at the resort has a fee as well (ie, MOH bouquet, extra boutinneres, music, video, photos, etc).

But back to topic...yes, cold feet is normal! Poor FI has been stressing for months about it - I just told him "babe...nothing's going to change. We already bought a house, have a dog - and we can't possibly be having any less sex!!!"

[Hartyt509]

Yep I think I will be dragged kicking and screaming and will need a gun at my head to say "I do"!!!

[michellepicksbrent]

Glad I'm not the only one with 'cold feet'! I've been having weird dreams about getting married and waking up in a panic! Although FH and I have been together for 4+ years, I question if we've been together long enough and whether I'm ready for the next stage of my life. I find that taking a deep breath and clearing my head helps. I'm sure that you'll have some crazy mixed emotions up until you arrive at your DW location and then the wedding will go from something that has been planned on paper to something that is real and all will be well.

[JBean]

I can't believe no one has posted in this thread for 2 years! Cold feet must be still common right?? My fiance is amazing - but I'm totally freaking out and it's still 7 months away!! Will it get worse as it gets closer?? 

[Michelle-2]

Hey JBean -

 

Actually you are not alone!  I got a major case of cold feet.  We were scheduled to get married on April 14th (yes, next week) at Beaches Turks  Caicos and in February, we decided to postphone the wedding until October.  To make a long story short... this is my second marriage, the only guests were my parents and my 12 year old daughter so pushing it out a bit was not a big deal.  Besides having the normal fears after a failed first marriage, nothing seemed to be "flowing" - and I started to panic.  My dress was a disaster (ordered from Babyonline), my custom wedding band was still not in, my AHR was still not planned, etc...  On top of all that, I had the constant stress of dealing with my ex (he still doesn't know that I am getting married).  After deciding to postphone, it felt like a HUGE weight lifted off my shoulders.  I can now actually look forward to the planning and get excited - and I have since the most perfect wedding dress two weeks ago, and my wedding band just came in.  so, now I am feeling much better.  My FI is an amazing man and so supportive and understanding of my decisions, which makes me want to  marry him even more!

[knitgirl13]

I'm not having cold feet about my fiance at all, just about if we're making the right choice eloping since everyone we invited decided they couldn't/didn't want to go for some reason or other.  I just hope we're not disappointed about not having anyone there to share our day with.  No AHR for us either.  The wedding industry where I live is out of control and that's part of why we are marrying in Mexico in the first place and nobody we know has a large enough home or yard to have a casual backyard BBQ.

[JBean]

Thanks ladies. I guess we all have our reasons. I've always been a bit of a loner and free spirit and just never pictured myself being "tied down" so it's taking some adjusting. I have no issues being in long term relationships... There's just something about a ring that makes everything so final.

[Michelle-2]

I can totally relate to that JBean.  It took me so long to get out of a very unhealthy and controlling marriage that sometimes I wonder why the heck am I doing this again now that I am "free".  But honestly, with the right man by your side, you won't feel like you are tied down.

 

I wish you all the best!!!