im having surgery in a week and getting really scared :(

[Michelle]

Soo this is a really rough topic for me but i just need to get this out....I have colon cancer and in a week and a half (Sept 25th) will be having major surgery to have my entire colon removed ....im beyond terrified!!!

I have a genetic condition that I got from my mom that means I definately was going to get colon cancer and I know have it...and its a disease that I lost my mom to when I was 13 ....Now that I am 21 I have to go through surgery to pretty much save my life before I get really sick and I have been having alot of breakdowns lately and Will (my FI) has been amazing with me but I just dont know what to do some days. I just wish I could finish college with my friends who are all doing 4th year right now but instead I have to be doing this...its a long surgery and then I am in hospital for two weeks after and then in bed for 3 months and then back in for a second surgery and after that it is about a month recovery and then I can go back to regular life!...thats just such a long time and it really bothers me

 

So tomorrow I am meeting with my specialist for my final appointment before the surgery and I already had a breakdown tonight thinking about this its becoming way too real and i just wish I could be healthy and not have to go through this I just really needed to vent on here and get this out....I am having a really difficult time thinking about everything that is going to start happening in a week ...its going to be February or so before im all better and until then I am pretty much on a liquid diet ....well the only good thing that I can joke about is that my FI said this is the best diet ever (I dont need one though lol) and I will be really tiny when i go try on wedding dresses lol....but seriously this is getting scary and im having alot of trouble sleeping at night lately ....I havent slept alone in about a year and will miss Will ALOT when I am in hospital for two weeks...but I know this will make me better its just gonna be a really long road for recovery.... thanks for listening to me..sorry this was so long

[Yari]

Oh you poor thing. I am so sorry you are going through this.

 

I can't even imagine how scared you are. You have every right to vent and feel scared.

 

You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[A10CalGal]

Oh my goodness Shelly...this is a huge deal obviously. I can't believe you are going through this. I am so happy that it's a known thing that you are dealing with pro-actively...but still, I totally get why you are feeling the way you are.

 

I bet you will have way more support that you can imagine when this surgery happens. I wish you the best possible outcome.

[NotYourAverageDW]

Oh Shelly, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. And I agree with the PP I'm glad that you are tackling this proactively.

 

Hang in there, and remember that we're here rooting for you. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

[Kat81]

aw you poor thing. Just think of what a relief it will be when it's over and you won't have to worry anymore! We are all here for you and I hope time flies by for you. At least while you are in bed you can count on us girls for your daily dose of drama/laughter!

[yamille]

Shelly this is major and anxiety is certainly expected. Glad that your FI is being supportive. Know that you are in our thoughts. Good luck with your visit tomorrow.

[Tracy]

Shelly - i'm so sorry you are going through this - you do not deserve this (nor did your mom). Stay positive, flirt a little with the doctors, tell your friends to bring you lots of trash magazines and most of all think that your mom would want you to go through with this. You will not be alone - we will all be with you in thoughts and it sounds like Will is going to be by your side the whole time. Thoughts and prayers to you.

[Andi]

Oh I am so sorry you have to be going through this. Our thoughts and prayers will be with you the entire way!

[MissyR]

I am sorry that you have to deal with this all. Know that we will be thinking of you here on BDW - if you need ANYTHING I am in Toronto too and would be happy to help out (even if it means bringing my laptop to the hospital so you can get your dose of BDWF)

[JoLo908]

I am so sorry... you do not deserve, nor does anyone deserve to go through what you are going through. I hope and pray that this surgery will help you to lead the long healthy life that you are meant to lead. It is okay, you will heal, and be stronger for it. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please be strong.