Any Grand Palladium brides?

[jengullage]

Hi Ladies,

I am having some difficulty in figuring out what I should do for my wedding shower.  When I got engaged I had just started college a week prior and we sent out our invitations within a month of getting engaged as we wanted to give our families as much notice as we could.  I did not give any friends at school an invitation as I did not know them well enough and was worried about what they would think of me asking them to fork out all this money for someone they barely knew to go to their wedding.  The same goes with my work friends (I have a part time job while I am in school)  I was not very close with any of them at the time I got engaged. I have since talked to my school friends and told them how I was unsure of what they would have thought if I had given them an invitation and they were all very understanding and told me that they completly understood and would not have been able to make it regardless.  They are planning a bachelorette day for me which is so sweet of them!

 

 I have gotten a lot closer with certain people at school and at work over the past few months, and now I feel as though we have great friendships.  It is about the time where people have been asking me about my wedding shower and encouraging me to let them know what I would like and who I would like to be there.  This is giving me such great anxiety because I feel as though I want to invite my newfound friends but I have done some research online as for "what is exceptable" and I have basically found that if someone is not invited to your destination wedding they should not be invited to the wedding shower".  I completely see where they are coming from as it would seem like a "gift grab".  At the same time now that these are my closer friends (pretty much the closest in my life right now) I don't want them to feel like I have chosen to leave them out of this as well plus I really only have a few friends from highschool and I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't come as we are not that close anymore.

 

One more problem is that my aunts seem to be feuding with my mom and sisters over stuff that I have chosen to stay out of.  I even invited the whole extended family to Christmas dinner and those aunts and uncles chose not to come as they didn't want to be around my mom and sisters.  I think that they all went back and fourth bad talking each other and accusing each  other of different things that I chose to completly not have a say in.  This really makes me feel like they will not come to my wedding shower, because of course my mom and sisters will be there.  I hate to make this sound like a pity party but lets be realistic--this is my nightmare--no one even shows up to this shower and believe me I am really feeling like this will happen.

 

I need your advise on what I should do. Am I facing things that other people are too? Any insight is helpful

[MyTye2B]

Hi Jen,

 

Don't worry, I feel like this is really common, especially with destination weddings!  I would say just be honest with the friends from school.  You're close with them now, and that's what matters, no one can fault you for not having invited someone that you knew for a month to your wedding.  I totally get why you think people would see it as a gift grab, but I think a lot of the literature out there online is geared towards traditional weddings.  We're quite different.  I think it would be perfectly acceptable to have that conversation with your friends, let them know that if they can manage to get away that they're welcome to join the wedding week too, just unfortunately you didn't know them at the time the planning all began and the actual wedding day has been planned for just your close family.  I'm positive they would understand and love to join you at your shower.  

 

Will you be having an AHR?  You can even say to them honestly which is the best policy, lol, that you feel badly about not having invited them to the wedding since it was planned when you didn't know each other well, but that you'd still love them to be able to be at your shower - especially since they've been asking about it, it's not like they're shying away from the topic - and you hope they will be able to come to your At Home Reception as well.   Just make sure you give them an invitation to that, haha.  We're doing just a very casual AHR in my parent's backyard out in Ontario, but a townhall kind of buffet thing out in Alberta. 

 

I'm questioning whether it's acceptable to invite people to my shower who have already told me that they can't come to my wedding.  Or the mother's of my bridesmaids who will obviously not be coming to my wedding but I stood in their daughter's weddings and my mom went to their showers (but my mom also went to most of their weddings in town too.)  What do you guys think about that?  That's for the shower that my mom and sister are throwing in my hometown of Windsor, although I've lived in Calgary for the last 4 years where my fiances family lives.  My dilemma with my shower is that his family is very small town, doesn't do things like that, so I'm not having one out here.  I think that's weird but that's another story for another day haha.  A friend of mine from Calgary said that she would like to throw kind of like a shower/party for me, so I guess following my own advice I'm going to invite people from work to that!  I suppose his family will also be invited to that!

 

I'm sorry to read about the family squabbles as well.  It's amazing how much drama goes on with weddings!  I've been feeling unlucky being so far away from family and friends during the planning but maybe it's a good thing haha!  Although no one is exempt from it I think.  My mom's all worried about the etiquette at my Windsor shower.  To the point that we're having it at this place called Gourmet Emporium and I can't have any lactose and she thinks it will look rude if I have a meal that's different from the one that's being served to the guests.  They have a gluten and lactose free menu available so I'm sure people won't be like, yeah make the bride sick because it's rude if she doesn't eat the same food as us! 

 

Another issue I'm having is my one bridesmaid (who has a LOT of money - I don't!) keeps asking me what am I having for favours at my wedding.  I told her that the OOT (which are costing quite a bit to put together) are the favours.  'Oh that's it?  What about for the actual wedding?' is what I keep getting as a response.  Do you think OOT bags are good enough or should I do something else?  I'm not that big on favours.  It's not that I don't appreciate people coming out, of COURSE I do, more than I can express.... it's just that they're usually little trinkets that people don't want anyway and then have to bring home with them.  Haha, it just dawned on me that the OOT bag will be the same but my hope is that they'll use the majority of the things I've included!  My sister and mom were so worried about the favours for the shower and I would much prefer they get little tags that say in lieu of favours a donation has been made to SickKids hospital in honour of Avery (my daughter who passed away) so that's what we're doing for the shower.  Should I do the same thing for the wedding or are the OOT bags enough? 

 

Anyways haha, long story short I think you're totally fine and in the right to invite your friends from school.  You want them there, they want to be there, they're happy for you and want to bring a gift.  Screw etiquette - do what feels right for you and your situation. 

 

Lauren

[karenk]

Hi Again,  sorry for the dual post back there.  I honestly didn't think the first one posted.  LOL

 

@ Jen,   I totally understand your dilemma for the shower, but I agree with Lauren, if your friends have expressed that they would like to be invited to the shower than absolutely invite them.  Most people realize that you can't invite absolutely everyone to a destination wedding but have some fun with the shower.  Express that gifts aren't manditory or something small is preferred especially from your college friends.  Student are typically pretty broke. LOL 

 

Lauren.. I feel that your OOT bags are plenty and also expensive things add up so fast.  I love the donation to a charity instead of favors idea.  We have asked for no gifts period from anyone but if they really want they are asked to make a donation to a Animal Rescue group I volunteer with.  I am doing favors but Im also not doing OOT bags.. for me it was a choice, one or the other.

 

Lauren - about our scanvenger hunt.  I am going to try and attach my list for you.  This is the final copy.  We actually stayed away from a lot of romantic stuff and have fun stuff.  Maybe you will find somethings you like.  We are having it as items and pictures.  Some of my tie breakers will be if they have items over pictures.  Items will give them extra points.  

 

 

 

Scavenger Hunt single.docx

[MyTye2B]

Originally Posted by karenk 

 

Lauren - about our scanvenger hunt.  I am going to try and attach my list for you.  This is the final copy.  We actually stayed away from a lot of romantic stuff and have fun stuff.  Maybe you will find somethings you like.  We are having it as items and pictures.  Some of my tie breakers will be if they have items over pictures.  Items will give them extra points.  

 

 

 

 

 

Karen this is so great!!  Thank you so much for attaching your list.  I did get a few ideas - Tacky Tourist and Airplane Snack for sure, haha!!  Love the idea of bringing the actual items if you have them for verification.  Thanks for the help!

 

Lauren

Scavenger Hunt single.docx

[WeddingCancun]

Originally Posted by normas09 

 

Thank you all for your help so far. One quick question...I tried looking for this on the site...how far is the resort from playa del carmen? Is it closer to Tulum? 

 

i think it's 30 minutes away from Playa del carmen

[karenk]

GP is in the middle it is approx 32km to Tulum and 32 km to Playa Del Carmen.. 

[87shayla]

Hello,

 

Just got back a week ago from our wedding at the Palladium, it was amazing!! So hard to leave there and come home, back to reality.

 

We used the wedding DJ app as well and it worked perfectly for the entire day. Definitely worth the $1.99

 

Our wedding supper was really good, top meal i had there in the two weeks we spent there. We chose the steak and i was surprised by how good it was and perfectly cooked....coming from an alberta girl that is quite the compliment.

 

If anyone has any questions feel free to ask me if you want, i'll try to remember to check back here every once and awhile.

 

Happy planning ladies

[perez21]

Hi Shayla,

 

Congratulations! We're getting married at Grand Palladium Palace this July. This thread has been great so far. Did you book a private reception? Were you able to do speeches etc.? Did you have a complete wedding? We were thinking of just getting married here in Toronto then just have a ceremony there. Does anyone know how this works? Does it have to be a vow renewal or can we do a faux civil ceremony?

Has anyone done the beach reception? I'm thinking of semi-prviate indoor reception then have a beach party. A lot of people were happy with DJ Mannia but with the added cost of having an outside dj, I don't know if it's worth it. We're already planning an outside photographer which I think is more important to splurge on.

 

Sorry for the barage of questions!

[87shayla]

There's no reason to be sorry about asking questions

 

Because we had a group over 40 (we had 60) we had to have a private reception, which I was happy about because a previous wedding we had been to at a palladium did not have over 40 people and they were kicked out of the a la carte right after cake cutting, which meant no dancing/party. So having the private reception worked out best for us. We got to turn on the tunes and dance for a couple hours.

 

We did have the complete wedding there, however when we started our planning we really considered doing the legal stuff at home before going. I would suggest doing the legal stuff at home if you can get away with it, so much easier, and can be cheaper for you when you are in Mexico. Basically you would then purchase the `renewal` package. They can also make this look as real as possible if you are trying to keep it a secret that you did the legal stuff at home. 

 

If you have a beach party after i think that would be a blast! It can get a bit windy and chilly on the beach at night but it would be very neat i think.

 

Hope that answered a couple of your questions

[MyTye2B]

Originally Posted by perez21 

 

Hi Shayla,

 

Congratulations! We're getting married at Grand Palladium Palace this July. This thread has been great so far. Did you book a private reception? Were you able to do speeches etc.? Did you have a complete wedding? We were thinking of just getting married here in Toronto then just have a ceremony there. Does anyone know how this works? Does it have to be a vow renewal or can we do a faux civil ceremony?

 

Has anyone done the beach reception? I'm thinking of semi-prviate indoor reception then have a beach party. A lot of people were happy with DJ Mannia but with the added cost of having an outside dj, I don't know if it's worth it. We're already planning an outside photographer which I think is more important to splurge on.

 

Sorry for the barage of questions!

 

Hi Perez, My fiance and I are getting married in Canada first and then we're just having a 'renewal of vows' ceremony at Grand Palladium.  It still sounds like it will all be the same - Vanessa even said we'll sign paperwork so to get a song for that part too.  I'm not quite sure how to go about getting legally married here.  We don't even know where we're going to do it yet.  We both work for an airline so we're thinking about going somewhere in Canada we've never been, like the east coast just us, to do it.  Or we may go back to BC where we got engaged, or we might go to my hometown Windsor so that my Nana can be there because I don't think she'll be well enough to come to the wedding.  We'll have to see.  I'm not sure about the beach party - I didn't even know that was an option but it sounds like fun!  We did end up getting a DJ but you're right it is expensive.  That's the one thing Tye is asking for in the whole wedding, lol, so I figure we'd do it!  I think the photographer is a nice splurge.  You'll have the pictures forever. 

 

Originally Posted by 87shayla 

 

Hello,

 

Just got back a week ago from our wedding at the Palladium, it was amazing!! So hard to leave there and come home, back to reality.

 

We used the wedding DJ app as well and it worked perfectly for the entire day. Definitely worth the $1.99

 

Our wedding supper was really good, top meal i had there in the two weeks we spent there. We chose the steak and i was surprised by how good it was and perfectly cooked....coming from an alberta girl that is quite the compliment.

 

If anyone has any questions feel free to ask me if you want, i'll try to remember to check back here every once and awhile.

 

Happy planning ladies

 

 

Congratulations, Shayla!  I'm really happy to hear that everything went great for you!  I'm an Alberta girl too so it's good to know the steak is up to par.    Enjoy married life, and come back to say hi when you can!