What have I learned from planning a destination wedding?

[EVKnowsitall]

Originally Posted by Jessica Correa 

 

 

I am debating whether to do the videographer. It is expensive but maybe I should reconsider and get one.... thank you so much

Absolutely. I can honestly say I would have deeply regretted if we did not have the videographer. I knew I wanted one right away but my husband didn't see the need since we paid a lot for our photographer. Pictures do tell a story, but the video captures the emotion. It's great to show the people who couldn't make it, great to show your future children should you have any, and great to see things you might have missed. In my MOH's toast she mentioned something about the look my husband had while he was waiting for me to come into the church- of course that is something I did not see, but the videographer caught a quick glimpse of it in our video. Things like that make the video worth it! Try to budget for it by taking something else out of the package that you feel like you can live without. For us it was decor. We let the natural ambiance speak for itself and that was a little sacrifice on my behalf because I wanted to do so much. We left the church with not a single decoration- no bows on the pews, no flowers, no fancy floral arrangements- and we did that so we could afford the videographer. It was worth it.

[KK2013]

This is a great thread!  It's funny, I'm not even married yet, but I can confirm a few things:

 

• This thread is awesome because it is such a support system!
• People really do wait until the last second to RSVP.  I have 88 responses yet to be received, with 2 weeks until the due date--and they had 3 months to respond!  I am sure I am going to have to hunt people down.
• It is true: the people you expect to come won't, and the people you don't will.  BUT, the most important people will
• Hysterical--people think it's easier and cheaper to have a destination wedding.  I suppose it CAN be cheaper, but I have found it's the same cost.  If anything, it is more difficult because of obvious logistics.  You can't just visit your venue to see how something looks anytime you feel like it, and you have to bring everything you have to a foreign location.  I am spending the same as my cousin who had 200 people to have 60 people.  AND, I would love to tell every person that flowers are NOT cheaper in a tropical location...they are more expensive! haha
• Going on a site visit is the best thing I ever did.  You can't truly get a feel for the place and the layout without seeing it in person.  No amount of maps and pictures can give you the same feeling as seeing it...if of course, you can work it into your budget. 
• Even though you have a travel agent, you will be inundated with questions regarding the travel from your guests.
• The tip about the midol is the most exciting news I've seen on here!  I have been listening to the song I'm dancing with my dad to every day in hopes of desensitizing myself so I don't cry! haha
• I've sent about 100 different centerpieces to the decorating company trying to come up with something beautiful in my price range.   Best thing I ever did was give them the price range and tell them to give me options.  One was actually cheaper than the told me it was earlier! ha!
• I created a word document outlining each of my events in the weekend with every detail from pictures of the location, to everything I am bringing for that event, they are provided, food choices, etc.  I am going to print multiple copies and give to every person involved.  That way, they have a quick reference of what I want

[samanthalise]

I love this thread so much. I am only at the beginning stages of planning but this thread has helped me realize future bumps I may run into! I am very inspired by all of the brides on this thread, thank you so much for the advice. I can't wait to come back and help other future brides with my own advice

[jandl2013]

Hello to all you past and future brides.

 

I can truly say that this sit has been a major blessing!  It has been my savior in terms of keeping me calm when i'm close to the breaking point or if i'm just stuck about how to move forward with an idea or problem.  I have experienced most of what has been talked about on this thread from people giving me a hard time about our location for the destination wedding, the hotel, etc. etc. etc....and the joke is my wedding has NOT yet occurred! lol

 

I have a ridiculously large family that is very traditional and opinionated and everyone wanted things done THEIR way.  I took a step back from everyone and concentrated on what my FI and I want and that has helped tremendously.  Because we both want to please our families so strongly, it has caused us so much unnecessary stress so the best advice I can offer is to concentrate on what the two of you want.  People that love and care about you guys and what you want will make the effort to either be there or provide emotional or other support if they are unable to attend.

 

• A travel agent will definitely help you out, especially when dealing with a large amount of people or people who have never traveled
• Don't inundate your FI with stuff they could care less about, you'll just get angry and frustrated so it's not worth it

• Don't spend too much on the unnecessary (ex. extra fancy save the dates and extra fancy wedding invites or decorations...like seriously people throw these things aways)  I think I have been getting way too caught up in some of these things so I had to put my own brakes on
• USE THIS SITE TO TALK WITH OTHER BRIDES WHO ARE IN YOUR SHOES!  I can't stress this enough because most people really don't want to know every single planning detail of your planning unless weddings are their thing or they really want to know.  This site is a fantastic source for information for us destination wedding brides or potential brides and to be able to vent to people who truly undertstand is such a big relief and it might save some relationships with family and/or friends that just don't get it or are just too blinded to see it.
• Don't STRESS...take a step back from planning if it becomes too overwhelming.  The last thing anyone wants to deal with is a true BRIDEZILLA!  YIKES!
• Remember to try to enjoy yourself during planning AND during your wedding. Don't let anyone steal your joy because you are getting ready to marry your sweetheart and after the wedding it will just be you and that person so use this time to create a bigger and better bond between the two of you that will last LONG after your big day!

 

GOOD LUCK LADIES

[mvee1025]

Originally Posted by Jessica Correa 

 

I learned that even though I went with a destination wedding because it was cheaper and less stressful, it is the COMPLETE OPPOSITE. 

YES!  everyone keeps asking how things are going and I always tell them whoever said a DW would be easier and less stressful was so off base!

[pongyang2001]

i love this site. thank you ladies for sharing all your thoughts and experiences. i am in the early stage of planning my wedding for next year. i hope i don't turn into a bridezilla if my guests don't rsvp on time

[Kate G]

Just got married in May and have learned a lot through the process!

 

- I definitely agree with those that said people you thought would be there won't --- hardly any of my extended family came to my wedding and it was really hard. BUT I can honestly say on the day of the wedding, I wasn't thinking of any of them

- Don't expect things to go entirely smoothly the day of; they probably won't...but it's okay!

- Friendships might be challenged and you may feel that you aren't being made to feel as special for your wedding because a lot of people can't come, so they act like they don't care that much.

- SPRING FOR GOOD PHOTOGRAPHY. I can't stress enough how important this is. We hired a photographer from my home state and flew him to Mexico, but it was worth every penny. Same goes for video. The photographer and videographer gave us priceless works of art that we will have for the rest of our lives...we could have saved a lot using the vendors at the resort, but to us, it was so worth it to spring for the good stuff! Here's our wedding film: http://vimeo.com/70227492

- You will most likely have to hunt people down for their RSVPs!

[Jessica Correa]

Originally Posted by Kate G 

 

Just got married in May and have learned a lot through the process!

 

- I definitely agree with those that said people you thought would be there won't --- hardly any of my extended family came to my wedding and it was really hard. BUT I can honestly say on the day of the wedding, I wasn't thinking of any of them

- Don't expect things to go entirely smoothly the day of; they probably won't...but it's okay!

- Friendships might be challenged and you may feel that you aren't being made to feel as special for your wedding because a lot of people can't come, so they act like they don't care that much.

- SPRING FOR GOOD PHOTOGRAPHY. I can't stress enough how important this is. We hired a photographer from my home state and flew him to Mexico, but it was worth every penny. Same goes for video. The photographer and videographer gave us priceless works of art that we will have for the rest of our lives...we could have saved a lot using the vendors at the resort, but to us, it was so worth it to spring for the good stuff! Here's our wedding film: http://vimeo.com/70227492

- You will most likely have to hunt people down for their RSVPs!

 

aww your wedding film was beautifully done! I absolutely loved it. 

I was questioning whether to get the videographer but after reading all these testimonies, I decided I will go the extra mile and get it! 

[NJBride2014]

Originally Posted by Kate G 

 

Just got married in May and have learned a lot through the process!

 

- I definitely agree with those that said people you thought would be there won't --- hardly any of my extended family came to my wedding and it was really hard. BUT I can honestly say on the day of the wedding, I wasn't thinking of any of them

- Don't expect things to go entirely smoothly the day of; they probably won't...but it's okay!

- Friendships might be challenged and you may feel that you aren't being made to feel as special for your wedding because a lot of people can't come, so they act like they don't care that much.

- SPRING FOR GOOD PHOTOGRAPHY. I can't stress enough how important this is. We hired a photographer from my home state and flew him to Mexico, but it was worth every penny. Same goes for video. The photographer and videographer gave us priceless works of art that we will have for the rest of our lives...we could have saved a lot using the vendors at the resort, but to us, it was so worth it to spring for the good stuff! Here's our wedding film: http://vimeo.com/70227492

- You will most likely have to hunt people down for their RSVPs!

Congrats Kate! Your video was so beautiful and moving I loved the emotion you both had on your special day.  Your dress was also so whimsical you looked gorgeous.  I might have to steal some of your decorations I got some really good ideas. 

[brownsugarbride]

Just got married in May and have learned a lot through the process! - I definitely agree with those that said people you thought would be there won't --- hardly any of my extended family came to my wedding and it was really hard. BUT I can honestly say on the day of the wedding, I wasn't thinking of any of them - Don't expect things to go entirely smoothly the day of; they probably won't...but it's okay! - Friendships might be challenged and you may feel that you aren't being made to feel as special for your wedding because a lot of people can't come, so they act like they don't care that much. - SPRING FOR GOOD PHOTOGRAPHY. I can't stress enough how important this is. We hired a photographer from my home state and flew him to Mexico, but it was worth every penny. Same goes for video. The photographer and videographer gave us priceless works of art that we will have for the rest of our lives...we could have saved a lot using the vendors at the resort, but to us, it was so worth it to spring for the good stuff! Here's our wedding film: http://vimeo.com/70227492 - You will most likely have to hunt people down for their RSVPs!

I loved your video, all of the amazing emotions...everything! Your dress was like a dream!