Guest list issues

[Spazz]

I invited 200+ (my choice though, not FI's mom...lol!) expecting 50-60 to attend. I was very excited that our final number was 85. The point is though don't invite a ton of people thinking that maybe they won't come because I had a ton of people (mostly from my large family) that I never thought would come (mostly aunts and uncles and cousins). I was so happy they made it, but it was a huge surprise. So if you're set on having a small number, keep the number that you invite low. Your FI should talk to his mom about it.

[nikkianddean]

I think we all go through this!! We explained to the parents that our hope was somewhere between 30-40. I have always envisioned my wedding as a small affair with only our nearest and dearest.

 

Well, of course our mothers are saying we need to onvite more people. They have been very nice about it so we agreed that there are a lot of other people who will get invites, but we don;t expect to be there. I think the list is at 150 now, but I am mailing most invites later for the folks we don't expect to come. The ones who we exect are going out in the next 2 weeks to give everyone 7 months. They also already recieved STDs

 

It is never easy.

[atlcatlover]

I talked with FI tonight and he had explained to his mom already that we were thinking immediate family and close friends only, and she pulled the "what about inviting cousin susie" who FI hasnt spoken to in 5+ years bit. I think most everyone has to deal with that somewhere along the line.

 

He offered to speak with her again, but I figure since I need to learn to deal with MIL issues now I would go ahead and do it.

 

I think I am just going to have to coach her out of the very traditional mindset that she has the same way I have had to do with my parents. I am not going to give her a hard number, but I am going to explain again about the limitations and go from there. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

[~*petals*~]

I'm going through this too... I was really trying to strategize about who to give the website info to, and just let the rest find out when they get an announcement/invite to an informal at-home reception, but FI says they will talk and word will get out and the folks who weren't invited to Jamaica for the wedding would be upset anyway....

 

Hoping that the same thing happens with us as did with some of the rest of the brides, where only a small percentage show up and we have a reasonably-sized wedding after all...

[Richard King]

There is an easy answer to this one. There is a restriction at the destination venue, limiting numbers!

[BlissfulMsMiranda]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard King There is an easy answer to this one. There is a restriction at the destination venue, limiting numbers!

I've thought about mentioning that - because it's often true (if you don't want to dish out extra $$ for more attendants)... but we've just decided to send out limited invitations to the destination ceremony, then we'll send out the proper invites to the masses for the after party when we get back!!

[Virg]

We are also going through this. To appease the parents, we decided to play it safe and send invites to everyone. We also expect 30 people at the most.

We are paying for the wedding, however, the parents agreed to to pay the extra little fees for the guests they insisted on inviting (if they come example, long lost cousins, family and college friends).

 

Hope this helps!