He wants to buy a motorcycle!!!

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Originally Posted by monicaswave Ok ladies so my FI just dropped the bomb that he has been looking at getting a motorcycle. First of all, I do think it's very dangerous to have one. Guys usually get carried away with speed and like to push their limits. Also, the city we live at is not very motorcycle friendly so drivers don't really care or watch for people on bikes. Half the roads here in Houston are in consturction most of the time so there is a good chance you will run into an unexpected pot hole or some loose debris. But most importantly we are paying (mostly he) for the wedding ourselves and I really don't think we need that extra expense right now. This made me really upset because even though I know my FI is covering the majority of the expenses for wedding I have been extremly thoughtful of our finances. I have cut down cost as much as possible on certain items and even sacrificed going on an all girls trip to Vegas with my friends so I can try to save as much as possible. He does make comments on how much money this wedding is costing and blah blah so I do stress at times with the cost. I passed on the dress I was sooo in love with because I didn't feel right asking my FI to pay that much money on a dress and now he wants to get a bike!!! I told him how I feel and I could tell it made him a little upset. I told him I wouldn't stop him form getting his bike but to please wait until after the wedding. Then, he said that we could upgrade our wedding to how much his bike ends up costing. That made me even more mad.....he only wants to upgrade our wedding to how much he spends on a bike!!!! GGGGggggrrrrr!!!! Ladies please give me some advice.

Even though I work and pay my share of the bills, my FI pays for mostly everything. He's also into extreme sports and has 4 dirt bikes, 3 sand rails, 1 harley, $5K worth of scuba diving equipment, 15 bowling balls, and yes he still bitches about the cost of the wedding and how it's stressing him out. And yet he'll spend a ton of money on his toys. In fact he just bought me my harley as well to go riding with! I guess the bottomline is that most men feel that it's a waste of money to throw a big party. They rather spend the money on stuff they can have for years or investment. And truthfully, I sometimes agree and feel a little selfish that I rather spend the $50K to upgrade my ring or travel around the world =) instead of the wedding and spending the money on guest who won't remember anything after a few shots! haha =)

Since my FI does pays for mostly everything and never ask for a dime from me, I just let him do and buy whatever he wants to. He knows that his priority is taking care of the family and putting a roof over our head and food on our table. As long as he can balance everything without stressing me out - I'm good =)

Also, we not only have a joint bank account, but we also have separate accounts of our own which I find it really nice. We don't stress over every penny that comes in and out and we don't know how much we pay for certain things we buy for each other. Well, I feel for you and I hope you two can come to a compromise =)

[Monique]

Well me and FI both own bikes and ride together...he had his before I met him and I learned how to ride in highschool...but bought mine a couple of years ago...I understand your view but...you don't want to stop someone from doing what they enjoy...the more you push the more he'll want the bike and to be honest he probably won't ride it that much...Good luck!

[alex]

Mat bought a sport bike when we were VERY low on cash. We were renting a house with 3 other people & I was making minimum wage!! We definately couldn't afford it, but I didn't really say anything about it. I actually really enjoyed it!!! (I've secretly always wanted one!) He had it for a few months & then he sold it for a new truck. He enjoyed it while he had it & then I think he kinda got it out of his system!

All I can say is that it sucks about the money part & him complaining about other expenses. But boys will be boys...