To Have or Not to Have a Bridal Party

[MoKe0506]

Quote:

Originally Posted by FYB87 The first time I was married I didn't have any and I won't this time either. I dont' have any females that I would even consider to be MOH or BM's because I don't have anyone that I think of as a best friend or friends. I don't have sisters (only brothers) so I'm going to skip it. My mother does feel like I should have them and just pick family members. But, that is not something I am going to entertain. I hardly ever even talk to those people. Don't even live in the same state either. Don't think I answered your question. But, that's what I'm doing!

I'm right with you. I do not have any sisters, just three brothers. And I have close girlfriends but we are not close, close. My best friend is my fiance, and since I'm marrying him I wouldn't know who to choose as my MOH, lol. So we're not having a bridal party and I am fine with that. My mother keeps pressuring me to have one, suggesting family members as well. But like you, I'm not close to any of them. I was in a friend's wedding in 2005 and I haven't spoken to her in over a year. If I chose someone to be my MOH I would make sure it is someone that would still be my friend 5, 10 years from now.

I think it's up you. It's 2008, weddings have changed and you don't have to follow the rules. It's your day. I am enjoying the stress of not having a bridal party. I can just focus on me....

[Yvette]

we are not having a bridal party. we are only going to have a flower girl & ring bearer. (lil brother & sister) i didn't feel comfortable putting anyone in that financial situation (plus some of my friends are sort of flaky). but in the end i am glad i didn't because now our guest list is a lot smaller than we originally anticipated.

 

my suggestion is do what you want. in the end it's just the 2 of you who really matter. no need to stress about it.

[Thomasjsgirl]

I agree with the majority - you don't have to please anyone but yourself. No MOH? No big deal!

[vale]

I have to agree, its your wedding, do what's right for you and you feel comfortable with. We only have 7 going (including ourselves) and our three children are our bridesmaids. If we didn't have them, there wouldn't be a bridal party either.

[Beach Bride 80]

I think it is perfectly ok to not go with a bridal party. In fact that is the way its done at a lot of destination weddings. We attended one with no bridal party and it was very relaxed and stress-free for everyone. I would follow what your heart says to do.

[DelightfulDani]

I think it really depends on if there are important people in your life who you would like to stand up for you and are willing to take the responsibilities. I have 3 friends and a sister who would absoulutely die if they were not apart of th wedding. They are looking forward to a destination wedding.

[blkladylaw]

I'm not having one. I always thought it was silly and never understood the necessity of it. I have two distinct girlfriends that are like family and they have been assisting me with planning, if I need to hand someone bouquet I will just hand it to them as they'll be front row and center anyway, I don't have a dress with a train for anyone to adjust, they are already plotting bridal shower and bachelorette party together...all with no official title and without having to buy a bridesmaid dress, shoes and accessories. Friends are already coming out of airfare and hotel costs...no need for them to buy a special outfit just so we can look color coordinated in pictures. My fiance doesn't care about it either. Also if you have a bridal party at a destination wedding from what I have read aren't you supposed to at least pay for their lodging? Just something else to consider. As people mention doing it because they want these people to share in your special day...I feel they are sharing in my special day even without the official title as they have been supporting me through the process and will be there front row and center in whatever they choose to wear.

[kevsgirl]

It's weird - I was completely resistant to having a wedding party, because I never saw the point. And our wedding is going to be very small, with so far about 8 people confirmed. I figure 20 max.

 

Anyway, what happened was the other weekend I was thnking about how excited my 2 sisters are about the whole thing and I realized it would be really nice to have them as my MOHs or BMs. My little sister lives in the same city as me, but my other sister lives in Australia. We haven't been all together for years. It's going to be a really fun time, I think and we're all looking forward to it. Plus, they're both the type of people who are very considerate of things like making sure my eyebrows are combed (LOL!) and the veil is straight. And it's making them even more excited.

 

So in a way, I chose more for them than me. But since it's a DW and they're definitely coming, the only thing that changes really is gettig them both some small bouquets.

Oh and my mother has already offered to make their dresses, so ...

 

[aeroo]

I never intended on having a bridal party because I didn't want the added work/stress of it all. But a week before the wedding we decided to have my sister and his brother be MOH and best man. They really didn't have to do anything but stand up there with us, so they didn't have the traditional roles of planning or doing anything, which was great. I didn't really care either what they wore or if anything matched since it was just the two of them, but it just happened that my sis had bought a dress that matched the colour accent on my dress so it turned out great.

 

I say if you don't have anyone in mind, just nix the whole bridal party idea. It's not necessary and you'll save yourself lots of stress too.

[Jen_S]

If no one jumps out you do not have to use anyone. If you want one possibly use your mom or another close family member.