Future sis-in-law driving me crazy!!

[Mrs. Martin]

So, I really have to vent because my soon to be sis is upsetting me!! First off, my FI and I went through so much drama with his family when we told them we were getting married in Cancun. Just to add to all this, my FI's sis calls me today to tell me that some family members that live out of state will be visiting this weekend and it would be a good opportunity to give them the invites that day. First off, I told his family from the beginning we will be sending out STD's to everyone, but only sending invites to the people that were going or were still maybe's. Now, she has the nerve to ask me why I'm not inviting her family anymore.

 

Uhh, who said that I didn't invite them?! They are not going, therefore I'm not sending them invites!! I'm sure by now she told her mom and her mom is going to turn around and judge the situation (and not to my favor). My mom and I are making my invites and do not feel like making 200 invites for his family that 1) haven't talked to my FI in years and 2) are for sure not going to the wedding!

 

Both our families are traditional Mexicans and a destination wedding is unheard of. But, my parents understand and support everything we are doing because they know it makes us happy. His family just judges us because we aren't doing everything their way when they got married or what the rest of the family does. Wait until they see the invites and see I didn't include RSVP cards (I'm having the guests RSVP through our website). They are really going to complain then!!

 

Thanks for listening to me vent!!

[Yari]

Yikes, that stinks. Sorry that you are going through this.

 

I swear sometimes family can be a PITA.

[jarauz]

I truely understand what your going through. My soon-to-be mother-in- law thinks we need to invite the 50 cousins/aunts/uncles/nieces/nephews/ of my FI, which he hasn't seen or heard from in......hum...hummmm..more than 10 years. Just because she moved to dominican republic and we're having are wedding in Punta Cana she feels I should invite these people. I'm pissed off. I even told her that we would have to pay for each person for the reception...I'm not having it....I told my FI he better let her have it.......

 

Thanks for leting me vent also Leslie.......

[BarefootBride]

ignore her. if shes not paying for, and sending them out Forget her!!!! Dont worry Its your wedding so do what you want to do!

[Kristin113]

Leslie... I know that it is easier said, than done, but you have to try and ignor everyone that tries to bring you down. I went through the same exact thing b/c my FI's family was pissed that we decided to have DW. We have been engaged now for over 9 months and they are still causing problems over it. Some people can not understand that it is your day and that the two of you have to do what is going to make you happy.

 

My only advice is to try and not let them get you down or change anything that you want for your wedding.......we had to learn this the hard way.

[lucy106]

Some people are so frickin nervy, I mean WTF! Who the hell does she think she is? As long as you and your FI are on the same page, screw her.

[Mrs. Martin]

Ha ha Thanks everyone!! It's good to know that I'm not the only one going through this! I'm the first one of my friends to get married, so they can't relate or understand the stupid drama that comes with wedding planning or having in-laws!!!

[Maura]

leslie, my FI comes from a pretty traditional mexican family, and surprisingly his entire family and all the extended family are in love with the idea of a DW. its my stupid american family that is hemming and hawing over EVERYTHING. we are doing website RSVPs too because 1) it will save money on stamps, and for all the stupid people who wont send them back anyway, and 2) its more eco friendly

 

dont sweat it, you dont owe an invitation to someone who already told you they arent coming, and who isnt close with your FI anyway.

[Hartyt509]

I personally would tell them to poke off!!! lol I'm gonna have exactly the same situation soon and i've realised the only way to deal with it is to say "Are you getting married? No, Are you paying for it?, well shut your trap and suck it up"

 

Harsh but I think its fair lol If she starts to give you crap just say look speak to me when you have something nice to say otherwise keep it shut.

 

Might seem harsh but its your day not theres and if you have to get snotty for them to get it - then do it better now than later.

 

Saying that you are probably nicer than me and won't want to upset them lol I just want to punch all their lights out lmao

[jajajaja]

I agree that your SIL has no right to comment on who you send invites to,. Just as an alternative perspective though- I didn't send invites to people that said no to the STD either. I did, however send them to family members that said no just for respect since they were family and also in hopes that they would change their minds. Several did too. DH had a few family members that booked like last minute. For us though, it was a matter of making 20 more invites. If you have to make 200 to accomdate his family, then I would skip it too. That's too much money.