Bridal shower questions...

[addisonreed1113]

I just had my first shower today :-) yeah! It was so great! mimosas shared memories, etc. I really could care less about gifts (though I did receive a lot of really nice things we need!) but just love the idea of getting together with everyone! I know it can get expensive, but I love going to showers and giving gifts and watching the bride (or mom if baby shower) open gifts!

I do know one very important rule.. you can't invite women you aren't inviting to the wedding. Also, as a thank you for my shower I am thorwing a very nice Bridesmaid luncheon for all my girls (6) and flower girl.

[addisonreed1113]

Quote:

Originally Posted by PDXlove I have a dumb question that I have wondered when I attend showers-- do you get people a gift for the shower and also bring one to the wedding? Is the gift you bring to the shower considered the wedding gift? I'm not having a shower but I have always been unsure of this and want to make sure I am getting it right. I truly enjoy getting people a gift to start their lives off or upgrade to nicer stuff but I'm not so much down with getting every friend that gets married multiple gifts for each party they throw up to the wedding. Not at this financial standpoint in my life!

It's not dumb...it gets really confusing!!! Yes you bring a shower gift AND a wedding gift.

[nylalany]

RE: GIFTS

1. Just b/c you've lived with someone or even on your own does not mean you have everything you need. I have hand me down pots and mismatched plates and silverware, no small kitchenware, etc., b/c I've spent $/time on furnishing my house, etc, and whatever - it just not always correct to assume this.

2. Even if you register for stuff, people will still give you non-registry items. I got so much lingerie, and then some things like bath products and vases and cookbooks and stuff, so at least if you register, maybe you'll get less of these things perhaps. (I like lingerie, but only a little of what I got fit since I'm so small, and some people didn't include gift receipts).

RE: SHOWERS

1. A shower is not just about gifts. It is a chance to hang out with your girl friends and relatives and be girly and have fun. At my LA shower of about 15 gals, we ended up playing games, which I thought I was against, but the main game turned out to be great! It was based on my cousin interviewing my fiance with 25 questions. At the shower, she read each question, asked the girls to guess if I'd know the answer or not, and then asked me for the answer. This game tested how well I knew my fiance, how well my friends knew me, and helped everyone get to know my fiance more without him even being there. Several gals quizzed their sig others when they got home!

2. My NY shower offered a chance for some of my old friends and many of my mother's friends to catch up with me since they were not able to come to Mexico for my wedding (although they were invited, per my mother's insistence). We were going to have a small shower, which I would have preferred, but these women actually asked if they could attend a shower if there was going to be one, since they wouldn't get to see me at my wedding. So go figure!

3. At both showers, there was a nice luncheon provided - my friends made the lunch, my mom catered hers, so people could enjoy a nice lunch together.

 

I have been to showers with "no gift" requests, so you can in theory do that too. And the charity option is always a nice one.

[Jacqueline]

I think Showers are a great tradition and a nice gesture. When I go showers, bridal or baby, I dont feel its gift grabbing, I'm always excited and happy to get them stuff. Its a nice gesture to start the newlyweds or parents-to-be off, ya know? A lot of times my fam will make sentimental things, like a photo album, or a scrapbook, something like that. Which is more exciting in a way b/c it's a surprise. I know that my sister felt alil weird registering at first and that thought she was making people feel obligated to get her something...but she realized that her fam and close friends wouldn't feel that way toward a shower for her. They were more than happy to go and celebrate her happiness.

[beachbride08]

Quote:

Originally Posted by PDXlove I have a dumb question that I have wondered when I attend showers-- do you get people a gift for the shower and also bring one to the wedding? Is the gift you bring to the shower considered the wedding gift? I'm not having a shower but I have always been unsure of this and want to make sure I am getting it right. I truly enjoy getting people a gift to start their lives off or upgrade to nicer stuff but I'm not so much down with getting every friend that gets married multiple gifts for each party they throw up to the wedding. Not at this financial standpoint in my life!

I have always given a gift for the shower, and money for the wedding. I was always told you should give at least enough $ to cover your plate(s). Around here that can be up to $80-150 pp depending on the place so it adds up. I usually spend around $50-100 for the shower gift depending on how closely related.

[katrina]

i have another shower question...

 

when filling out the card do you sign it from you and your fi? or just you because it's a girl event and fi isn't there...? not sure what "etiquette" is on this one.

[nylalany]

I sign it just from me because it is a shower and a girl thiing and the guy wasn't invited. However I did get cards signed from both (which I thought was confusing, but I guess some people do that too.

[DanielleNDerek]

nylalany- after seeing pics from your shower, i'm getting psyched to have one. Yours looked like fun! And the game you described with the 25 ?s was a great idea.

[RoSean]

Don't miss out on a bridal shower.

It's a once in a lifetime experience like your wedding.

 

I'm not about gifts either, but once in a awhile you have to embrace the attention and accept the love of your family and friends.

[KellyMN]

People bring a gifts to the wedding and the shower. Where I'm from, shower gifts are a lot of things off your registry, if you have one. Wedding gifts are a lot of cash. It's a lot different for a DW than a traditional wedding I think. And, it probably varies a lot by generation and geographical location. If you do go to a shower though, of course your wedding gift is a little less.