GRRRR... EX GF's. and GF's

[jajajaja]

haha that's a nice track record. Just to put this out there- there are some really crazy guys out there too. A lot of guys dominate the "head games" playing field.

 

As for your current problem, are you dating the same type of girl? I know lots of crazy girls (FYI they are normal in friendships but when it comes to relationships with a guy- forget about it. All sanity disappears.) Typically it seems like the crazy girls are pretty much needy from the get-go. Then they get slightly more psychotic as time progresses.

[jean-marcus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LC_Rachel haha that's a nice track record. Just to put this out there- there are some really crazy guys out there too. A lot of guys dominate the "head games" playing field. As for your current problem, are you dating the same type of girl? I know lots of crazy girls (FYI they are normal in friendships but when it comes to relationships with a guy- forget about it. All sanity disappears.) Typically it seems like the crazy girls are pretty much needy from the get-go. Then they get slightly more psychotic as time progresses.

but all of them (except for one) started out totally normal. infact i would comment about how odd it is that they arent psycho.. and then seriously like clock work.. about a month into it... POOOFFFF nut case....

i think i just need to not date a woman until a month of knowing them and then wait to see if they go crazy...

[jajajaja]

haha thats a good idea. Make get to know them as a friend first.

 

My FI and I were "friends" for like 8 months before we started dating. He asked me out all the time but I would say no because I wasn't sure I wanted to go there. Thank goodness he kept asking til I said yes.

[A10CalGal]

So, if I were to address this issue, I wouldn't see it as a "why are the women I date so crazy?" issue, but rather a "what is it about me/my past that attracts dysfunctional relationships." We tend to recreate past dysfuntion in current relationships, whether we are conscious of it or not.

 

I used to wonder why every guy I dated turned out to be a lying cheating asshole...thought I had bad luck. Then I realized that I was attracting lying cheating assholes - so then I had to take a look at myself. What was the underlying cause for bringing sub-par people into my life? What kind of people do I really want to attract into my life? What do I need to do differently to make that happen? Honestly, there was a lot of deep shit there, but the easiest thing I did was this: when you feel a strong attraction to someone, turn around & walk away! You are attracted to crazy girls, like it or not. You need to start dating girls that you don't feel an instant crazy attraction to...try it.

[dragonfly]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jean-marcus so finally able to just walk away from this last one i was dating... ive had enough of those head games and childish behaviour and drama.... seriously... is it that hard to find a woman who has a level head on her shoulders, void of SERIOUS emotional baggage and issues, and with somewhat moral standards, and some kind of direction in life im telling you the women here in seattle (minus the ones on bdw who are already taken of coursssse) are all nut jobs... here is pretty much the basic low down of the last ones 1. compulsive liar (didnt even know her real name or that she had a kid and was still married)

Quote:

Originally Posted by mauraw how does that happen??

It happens because if you are cheating on your husband, of course your a liar, it's the only way that works, if she's cheating on her family she has no consious, so it's easy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kat81 You need to come to Texas. I'll hook ya up with some saneish hot chicks

Don't come to Toronto, because all I can hook you up with are insanishly HOT chicks

"...why cant women be easier to read."
I don't think we are that difficult, but most guys I know are reading around ass level

Quote:

Originally Posted by jean-marcus no. seriously though. guys dont have issues... most guys want 1.sex, 2. beer, 3. sports personally i could care less about two of them (guess which ones) hahaha I agree with you there, guys are pretty simple, you forgot cars, but it's usually the sex part of that equation that keep men from making good choices in the women they choose no seriously. i dont want some complex woman.. i cant stand that. i want a woman who says what she really means. i hate games

In the beginning there will always be a few games, you would be bored if there weren't, you just have to wade through the crap. Now let's be honest till we are really ready for a potential long term relationship, the bad girls/boys are always going to be more appealling. Have you really thought about what you are ready for? Are you really looking for the right one or do you get blinded by the hot factor. One of my best friends is the hottest, pretiest girls I have ever met, guys LOVE her, hell girls LOVE her (another reason why guys love her) Well she goes out with guys and they are so in awe of her but not for much more then a month. Then they say whay didn't you tell me she was nut's, and nut's she is, but damnit she is one hot, fun, nut job (I love her). She never hides it but guys are just too stupid in the beginning to see it because they can't see past the face, the boobs, the ass, and her up for anything personality to see how truly insane she really is. anyway my point is it's most likely you that you need to take a look at, not the women, because trust me there are lot's of good one's out there you just have to work a little harder to find us

[jean-marcus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Christa So, if I were to address this issue, I wouldn't see it as a "why are the women I date so crazy?" issue, but rather a "what is it about me/my past that attracts dysfunctional relationships." We tend to recreate past dysfuntion in current relationships, whether we are conscious of it or not. I used to wonder why every guy I dated turned out to be a lying cheating asshole...thought I had bad luck. Then I realized that I was attracting lying cheating assholes - so then I had to take a look at myself. What was the underlying cause for bringing sub-par people into my life? What kind of people do I really want to attract into my life? What do I need to do differently to make that happen? Honestly, there was a lot of deep shit there, but the easiest thing I did was this: when you feel a strong attraction to someone, turn around & walk away! You are attracted to crazy girls, like it or not. You need to start dating girls that you don't feel an instant crazy attraction to...try it.

i know i already stated this a little later in the thread. i am attarcted to fun spontaneous women and i guess im attracted to that side of them and then later on i learn that i met them at their "high" and then when i get ot know them i come to realize that they have this insane low to them. why cant bi polar people always have that "up" side to them because thats like the best woman for me. always happy and joyous and wanting to go explore the world... just like me...

i havent had any traumatic relationships that im trying to recreate. ive had sane ones. its just the last two years have been nut jobs. i think i need to find some foreign girl. . go back to sweden and find a woman there and bring her back hahaha...

ORRRR mail order brides.. hmm doesnt sem like such a bad idea now jk

[jajajaja]

I have a crazy spontaneous friend- but she's about 4 hrs away.

[jean-marcus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by dragonfly In the beginning there will always be a few games, you would be bored if there weren't, you just have to wade through the crap. Now let's be honest till we are really ready for a potential long term relationship, the bad girls/boys are always going to be more appealling. Have you really thought about what you are ready for?

i dont think i can explain this enough.... I HAAATE GAMES>. i dont like them. i never have. as soon as i notice that they are playing games i lose interest. its just a headache and drama.. i honestly want a woman who is honest and speaks her thoughts. life is too short to play games...

and i have always been ready to settle down and have a serious relationship. im not like most guys. i hate casual dating. im looking for miss right. but im not about to just rush into it and settle for anything. im not about to say "i do" before i know that its gonna be forever.

[rodent]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jean-marcus i dont think i can explain this enough.... I HAAATE GAMES>. i dont like them. i never have. as soon as i notice that they are playing games i lose interest. its just a headache and drama.. i honestly want a woman who is honest and speaks her thoughts. life is too short to play games... and i have always been ready to settle down and have a serious relationship. im not like most guys. i hate casual dating. im looking for miss right. but im not about to just rush into it and settle for anything. im not about to say "i do" before i know that its gonna be forever.

I agree. There don't have to be games in the beginning. Mike & I never played any games. We were always honest & straight forward. It was so refreshing. I had been ready to be in a relationship like that, but every guy I dated was always so wishy washy. I felt like they didn't know what they wanted so it was too confusing to me & just got frustrating. Mike knew he wanted to be with me without any doubts. So I think that's what made things so simple. I'm not saying our relationship is a fairy tail. We have our fights & things to work through. But, we are always improving as a couple.

So if you are ready then to be serious about someone then I think it just takes the right person. Are you dating girls your age? or ones a lot younger? If they are younger they may not be ready for anything serious.

Would you consider online dating? I think it works for so many people because so many of the people on their are tired are messing around with the dating scene & just want to find someone they can really care about. Then there are some just looking for a good time, but usually you can sort them out. I haven't done it, but my friends have had good experiences. If I was single right now, I'd definitly be giving it a shot.

[jean-marcus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgan I agree. There don't have to be games in the beginning. Mike & I never played any games. We were always honest & straight forward. It was so refreshing. I had been ready to be in a relationship like that, but every guy I dated was always so wishy washy. I felt like they didn't know what they wanted so it was too confusing to me & just got frustrating. Mike knew he wanted to be with me without any doubts. So I think that's what made things so simple. I'm not saying our relationship is a fairy tail. We have our fights & things to work through. But, we are always improving as a couple. So if you are ready then to be serious about someone then I think it just takes the right person. Are you dating girls your age? or ones a lot younger? If they are younger they may not be ready for anything serious. Would you consider online dating? I think it works for so many people because so many of the people on their are tired are messing around with the dating scene & just want to find someone they can really care about. Then there are some just looking for a good time, but usually you can sort them out. I haven't done it, but my friends have had good experiences. If I was single right now, I'd definitly be giving it a shot.

finally someone agrees with me that games are detramental to a relationship haha

i have dated women 19-42 (im 30) and there doesnt seem to be a happy medium... get them too young and they are all about partying and sleeping around and this and that... get them older then they are desperate to settle down usually and seem to have an insane amount of issues built up from past relationships... usually i seem to date a few years younger then me but that doesnt work either hahaha

im just SOL